Yet another GAF thread - I still haven't got over it :( (No spergfits allowed)

[bud]

when i hadn't discovered the 'proper' way of masturbating yet, i would masturbate by rubbing my dick against my left thigh.

is this why it bends to the left.

[bud]

i also remember jerking off to naughty newgrounds.com games. 

roast beef or vagina flash games

didn't even care if it ended up roast beef. still tugged

there were those games where you tried to fuck the woman.

the women were so well drawn.

big tits.
big butt.
long legs.

i'm horny right now.

[nudemacusers]

i honestly wonder if i made my dick curve as a result of all the frenzied masturbation of youth. does science have an answer for this.

[Atramental]

I think it curves left if your right handed and curves right if you're left handed. 

[Your Stalker]

mine is straight

[nudemacusers]

and if your pillows are polyfill instead of down?

[Himu]

lol

[bud]

I think it curves left if your right handed and curves right if you're left handed. 

what if it's straight

are you ambidextruous then

[Rufus]

As I'm trying to find out why dicks curve, it occurs to me that Wikipedia/Wikimedia has porn on it. No age-gates, no nothing.

[benjipwns]

As I'm trying to find out why dicks curve, it occurs to me that Wikipedia/Wikimedia has porn on it. No age-gates, no nothing.

There's some really amusing diagrams in some of those sex related Wikipedia articles.

[Rufus]

HOLY SHIT!

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

This guy can fuck around a corner. And I thought peeing with an erect, but regular, dick was annoying.

[Atramental]

Must be a bitch to pee with that thing.

[brob]

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:GIF_videos_of_male_masturbation

some real creative stuff here 

[bud]

HOLY SHIT!

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

This guy can fuck around a corner. And I thought pee-ing with an erect, but regular, dick was annoying.

  http://i.imgur.com/93qggwG.jpg 

[Atramental]

I think it curves left if your right handed and curves right if you're left handed. 

what if it's straight

are you ambidextruous then

I dunno.

Shit might be genetic for all I know.

[Atramental]

HOLY SHIT!

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

This guy can fuck around a corner. And I thought pee-ing with an erect, but regular, dick was annoying.

  http://i.imgur.com/93qggwG.jpg 

(Image removed from quote.)

[Broseidon]

those dicks

[nudemacusers]

not really impressed with those dicks tbh

the techniques represented, though

[bud]

  http://efukt.com/21010_78_Percent_Of_His_Sexual_Partners_Quit.html 

[Himu]

Those dicks....

[Shaka Khan]

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:GIF_videos_of_male_masturbation

some real creative stuff here 

Most of it were done by the same person.

[Rufus]

http://i.imgur.com/93qggwG.jpg 

(Image removed from quote.)

Ahoy, Captain Hook.
Yeah, something's not right there. Could be this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peyronie%27s_disease

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:GIF_videos_of_male_masturbation

some real creative stuff here 

The guy with the toilet roll.

[nudemacusers]

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:GIF_videos_of_male_masturbation

some real creative stuff here 

Most of it were done by the same person.

unfortunately. 

[Atramental]

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:GIF_videos_of_male_masturbation

some real creative stuff here 

Most of it were done by the same person.

[bud]

the campfire method hahaha

[StealthFan]

The Dark Master Yakub has taken this thread 

[Phoenix Dark]

when i hadn't discovered the 'proper' way of masturbating yet, i would masturbate by rubbing my dick against my left thigh.

is this why it bends to the left.

First time was while looking at a Jet magazine; I thought I had peed my pants so I hopped out my bed and ran into the bathroom.

The versitality of the thigh maneuver can't be overlooked. I was able to do it in public without anyone knowing - although I only tried while driving with my parents. To the unsuspecting eye it just looks like you have a hand on your thigh

[Your Stalker]

i still do the thigh rub from time to time

[nudemacusers]

i'm like odb, there's no father to my masturbation style 

[StealthFan]

Jerking in public is so satisfying.

[Phoenix Dark]

I didn't even know about the traditional jerk off fashion for a year, despite seeing chicks jerk guys off on video.

[thisismyusername]

HOLY SHIT!

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

This guy can fuck around a corner. And I thought peeing with an erect, but regular, dick was annoying.

I'm saying that's half-mast. There's no way that one is real-hard.

http://i.imgur.com/93qggwG.jpg 

(Image removed from quote.)

 

[Phoenix Dark]

those dicks look like they'd be banned from Steam for wall hacks.

[Shadow Mod]

[bud]

we got our first computer at home in my first year of high school. dragon ball z was all the rage at the time.

this kid in class had mentioned that dragonball-x.com--and that's the first porno site i ever visited. 

i remember getting creative and typing in random shit like hotsex.com into the adress bar. one day i found out it saved your internet history so i freaked out. left the house, ran towards my buddy's house, but he wasn't home. i had to delete everything before my brother got home. i don't know how long it took me, but in the end, i got the job done.

[Phoenix Dark]

The first hardcore porn I saw was some Asian shit that blew my mind. I had no concept of oral sex until I saw that shit. Then I started seeing more extreme photoshops, like Gillian Anderson sucking a dick and the Spice Girls getting nutted on.

Downloading porn on a 56k AOL connection was an Olympian feat. That's why I don't respect children today, they never struggled like I did. It took me DAYS to download this on Kazaa, and it was my first porn video iirc
http://www.xvideos.com/video223080/funny_videos_-_porno_bloopers_-_asian_gets_scared_off_big_dick

that shit had me like


and thus my porn palette was formed.

[Shadow Mod]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=802041

[Shuri]

i'd be interested in seeing that data

Its too early for this research to see daylight breh. Im still working on my White People book (Image removed from quote.)

store pause worthy "data" on your computer for research purposes, brehs

and how many pause worthy "films" are stored on your personal computer, friend?

The only porn I ever downloaded on my computer was a collection of Heather bj videos. Remember that blonde wife who did oral videos back in the early 2000s?

Heather 

Bonus reading material: http://thoughtcatalog.com/hersh-bavnik/2013/12/the-legend-of-heather-i-deepthroat-an-incomplete-story-of-americas-greatest-porn-star/

[Broseidon]

The first proper porn vid I saw was downloaded from kazaa 

I can still picture it in my head.

[nudemacusers]

can't even remember my first porn.

I've been in this game for years, it made me a animal.

[benjipwns]

Heather 

You know how people talk about how porn creates unrealistic expectations and blah blah blah.

She certainly made that true for me. 

[spindashing]

I never downloaded porn on Kazaa but I did make the dumb shit mistake of downloading an obvious virus disguised as a Photoshop download. 

[doctavius bonbon]

can't even remember my first porn.

I've been in this game for years, it made me a animal.

I can't remember either tbh, but it probably looked something like this:

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

i guess it's even though you can't see shit

[benjipwns]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=108183993&postcount=992

 

[benjipwns]

Devolution
Banned

Finally. It's safe to post on GAF for a while again.

[Phoenix Dark]

the most frustrating thing about Heather and Wifey is that they only did videos with their husbands. I would have paid to see either of them with a black guy.

Wifey has a ridiculous tease video where she watches bbc porn and then uses a black dildo, but that's it.

[doctavius bonbon]

Devolution
Banned

Finally. It's safe to post on GAF for a while again.

slain by the animu. 

[Shadow Mod]

Like someone getting off to K-on girls talking massive shit about men being men isn't hilarious.

Whatever.

[MIMIC]

  http://i.imgur.com/93qggwG.jpg 

(Image removed from quote.)

[Atramental]

Like someone getting off to K-on girls talking massive shit about men being men isn't hilarious.

Whatever.

Must've caught duckroll on a bad day.

[thisismyusername]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=108183993&postcount=992

 

TL;DCTR, Mumei. Sorry, bb.

[Rufus]

Read the bit Liu Kan quoted at least. Good stuff.

[bachikarn]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=108134976&postcount=1203

oh shit, I totally linked to the wrong post

[Shadow Mod]

Like someone getting off to K-on girls talking massive shit about men being men isn't hilarious.

Whatever.

Must've caught duckroll on a bad day.

Doubt it was him actually.

Anyway I don't consider airing someone's dirty laundry to highlight that they're probably not posting in good faith/kind of disgusting/possibly a pedo to be "outside shit." To me it warns other posters they're wasting their time.

But whatever that runs corollary to "every thread is a vacuum only post 'nicely', respect everyone."

Respect is earned. And I certainly don't respect dudes who jerk it to little anime girls, and there are plenty over there.

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=108133314&postcount=1202

What else is that thread for other than giving members pictures of your SO to jack off to?

[Shadow Mod]

if your position on respect is that people don't receive it by default and must do something to earn it, GAF must be a real crushing disappointment for you

Some posters are cool though and I've met more than a few irl but there are just some things that I refuse to dignify. Letting people know they're wasting their time on some gross ass dude is just something I feel is necessary.

[nudemacusers]

Its a gaming forum, everyone is a gross ass dude

i'm not gross, i change my sheets yearly and shower many times a week.

[headwalk]

if your position on respect is that people don't receive it by default and must do something to earn it, GAF must be a real crushing disappointment for you

it's a pretty loathsome mindset in general, mostly floated by the kind of city wanker dickheads who i have to deal with every time i want to go play pinball (the only good pinball bar around here is right in the middle of financial district) as an excuse to be city wanker dickheads to anyone who they haven't shared a one grand lunch or semi conscious hooker with at some point.

[Shadow Mod]

Its a gaming forum, everyone is a gross ass dude

Hey that'd be fine if they dropped the pretense of elevated discussion. Who honestly wants to deal with the musings about manhood from someone who jerks it to K-On? I was just informing the masses.

[nudemacusers]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=108133314&postcount=1202

it appears this guy, going by the upload dates on his flickr, has been fake internet dating this chick for several years. lmao christ.

and drawings of her too :deadpos

[Shadow Mod]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=108133314&postcount=1202

it appears this guy, going by the upload dates on his flickr, has been fake internet dating this chick for several years. lmao christ.

and drawings of her too :deadpos

Drawings? Breh links.