Decided to give this a rewatch to see if I'm wrong about it being a complete waste of time when better mech shows like Gurren Lagaan exists. We'll also see if Shinji is still an intolerable POS, or if his existence is somehow justified.
Just to get it out of the way: there's zero chance I'll be putting in anywhere near the amount of effort Karakand put into his Blossom thread. I will not be doing screencaps. I'll be watching on one monitor and typing up observations on the other. Let's get started.
Episode 1
The episode starts off on the right foot, with a shot of what looks to be an Angel under the water, and some cool shots of perimeter defenses and empty city streets. Good apocalytic/world-at-war vibe.
Around 3:30, Jay Dubya appears on screen, and my irritation level rises substantially.
4:00 - cool battle scene as the Angel shrugs off human military attacks like Rahxephon shrugs off interest from black chicks.
7:00 - car held together with duct tape like what I imagine Karakand drives on his way to a 16 hour day of misery. Fan-service thigh shot of the purple-haired chick. She has some internal monologue about making car payments, like that fucking matters when Revelation is happening. More JayDubya shots.
11:00 - Shinji is reading an instruction manual, because clearly JayDubya never planned ahead and bothered to train humanity's last hope in advance. I would have had the kid in training since he learned to crawl, but that's just me. Libertarians aren't known for their practicality.
13:30 - Shinji is just now learning that he's there to pilot a giant robot. Purple-haired chick didn't bother to explain this to him during the car ride. Apparently the instruction manual he was reading was about something else entirely, probably some useless shit. Everyone involved in this plan is a goddamn moron.
13:40 - the next few minutes: - Extended scene showing Shinji being a little bitch. Refuses to pilot the Eva, asks why he's there after it's just been explained to him, then after he's given the middle finger to humanity and forced them to go with a pilot on life-support, whines about how he isn't needed after all. It only took 17 minutes to establish this kid as the worst protagonist in history.
18:40 - Shinji mans up after seeing that the other pilot, Rei, literally is on life-support. Now he's going into battle with absolutely zero training because JayDubya doesn't believe in central planning.
21:20: Purple haired chick: "Can we really do this?" JayDubya: "If we don't stop the Angel, humanity is done for." No fucking shit you morons. Even Shinji gets that at this point. Everyone seems to love contradicting things they said minutes earlier.
22:00 - Shinji is facing down the Angel. Cut to credits.
Next up: Episode 2.
