Author Topic: #latestagecapitalism  (Read 28182 times)

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Great Rumbler

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#latestagecapitalism
« on: April 19, 2017, 02:58:40 PM »
One of the most lavishly funded gadget startups in Silicon Valley last year was Juicero Inc. It makes a juice machine. The product was an unlikely pick for top technology investors, but they were drawn to the idea of an internet-connected device that transforms single-serving packets of chopped fruits and vegetables into a refreshing and healthy beverage.

Quote
Google’s venture capital arm and other backers poured about $120 million into the startup. Juicero sells the machine for $400.

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But after the product hit the market, some investors were surprised to discover a much cheaper alternative: You can squeeze the Juicero bags with your bare hands.

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The experiment found that squeezing the bag yields nearly the same amount of juice just as quickly—and in some cases, faster—than using the device.

 :idont

spoiler (click to show/hide)
Quote
The device also reads a QR code printed on the back of each produce pack and checks the source against an online database to ensure the contents haven’t expired or been recalled, the person said. The expiration date is also printed on the pack.
dog

I'm a Puppy!

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #1 on: April 19, 2017, 03:20:17 PM »
$120 Million :dead
spoiler (click to show/hide)
how much is the Star Citizen tally at?
que

Brehvolution

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #2 on: April 19, 2017, 03:26:40 PM »
:cac
©ZH

Joe Molotov

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #3 on: April 19, 2017, 04:16:23 PM »
Use your hands? What is this, some kind of baby toy? :snob
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Steve Contra

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #4 on: April 19, 2017, 04:17:06 PM »
I read this and was convinced there was some sort of mistake or it was missing a step. Like you had to juice real fruit into bags you could store or something. Something beyond just being a thing that takes bags of juice and puts them into a glass.
vin

etiolate

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #5 on: April 19, 2017, 04:41:20 PM »
I like to imagine trollish business ideas to pitch to Shark Tank. The last one I had was crossbreeding a cat and a squirrel to solve the problem of cats getting stuck in trees.

Syph

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #6 on: April 19, 2017, 05:30:40 PM »
i dont get the title joke
XO

Kara

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #7 on: April 19, 2017, 05:36:40 PM »
i dont get the title joke

It's a reference to being in the final stages of a condition (usually a terminal one) when the symptoms of an ailment tend to be at their most severe.

etiolate

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #8 on: April 19, 2017, 05:46:27 PM »
I wasn't aware that bad investments were a recent development.

chronovore

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #9 on: April 19, 2017, 08:57:43 PM »
This is just Silicon Valley's latest Cue Cat.

DMCA to protect ink jet cartridges are another idea which needs to be shot in the head. Is that gone yet? I want to know, but if I look, I'll rabbit hole for another hour.

Kara

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #10 on: April 19, 2017, 09:00:55 PM »
I wasn't aware that bad investments were a recent development.

Silicon Valley's particular brand of solutionism leading to hilarious (if dangerous in the case of Theranos) malinvestment is a rather specific phenomenon, though how much its existence can be seen as an indictment of capital over giving nerds any say in anything worthwhile whatsoever is something I am agnostic about.

The title is also a pun on late capitalism, but it wasn't clear to me if that was intended.

nachobro

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #11 on: April 19, 2017, 09:01:25 PM »
This is just Silicon Valley's latest Cue Cat.

DMCA to protect ink jet cartridges are another idea which needs to be shot in the head. Is that gone yet? I want to know, but if I look, I'll rabbit hole for another hour.
as someone who just had to deal with that shit the other day, no it is not gone yet :maf

Great Rumbler

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #12 on: April 19, 2017, 09:23:54 PM »
I wasn't aware that bad investments were a recent development.

Silicon Valley's particular brand of solutionism leading to hilarious (if dangerous in the case of Theranos) malinvestment is a rather specific phenomenon, though how much its existence can be seen as an indictment of capital over giving nerds any say in anything worthwhile whatsoever is something I am agnostic about.

The title is also a pun on late capitalism, but it wasn't clear to me if that was intended.

The intent of the title is to indicate that capitalism will not die in the chaotic flames of socialist revolution, but slowly drown in a sea of overproduced IoT junk designed specifically to appeal to venture capitalists and no one else.
dog

Trurl

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #13 on: April 19, 2017, 09:47:43 PM »
Are these just bags of juice?  What is this? 

recursivelyenumerable

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #14 on: April 19, 2017, 09:49:55 PM »
Quote
The intent of the title is to indicate that capitalism will not die in the chaotic flames of socialist revolution, but slowly drown in a sea of overproduced IoT junk designed specifically to appeal to venture capitalists and no one else.

Quote from: Karl Marx
At a certain high point this increasing concentration in its turn causes a new fall in the rate of profit. The mass of small dispersed capitals is thereby driven along the adventurous road of speculation, credit frauds, stock swindles, and crises. The so-called plethora of capital always applies essentially to a plethora of the capital for which the fall in the rate of profit is not compensated through the mass of profit — this is always true of newly developing fresh offshoots of capital — or to a plethora which places capitals incapable of action on their own at the disposal of the managers of large enterprises in the form of credit.

... If the rate of profit falls, there follows, on the one hand, an exertion of capital in order that the individual capitalists, through improved methods, etc., may depress the value of their individual commodity below the social average value and thereby realise an extra profit at the prevailing market-price. On the other hand, there appears swindling and a general promotion of swindling by recourse to frenzied ventures with new methods of production, new investments of capital, new adventures, all for the sake of securing a shred of extra profit which is independent of the general average and rises above it.
QED

Joe Molotov

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #15 on: April 19, 2017, 10:04:31 PM »
Are these just bags of juice?  What is this? 

They're bags of juice. That you put in a $400 machine and it squeezes the juice out of the bag.
©@©™

CatsCatsCats

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #16 on: April 19, 2017, 10:59:31 PM »
Into a cup! For drinking!


TAKE MY MONEY
😽💨

Syph

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #17 on: April 19, 2017, 11:00:45 PM »
Quote
The intent of the title is to indicate that capitalism will not die in the chaotic flames of socialist revolution, but slowly drown in a sea of overproduced IoT junk designed specifically to appeal to venture capitalists and no one else.

Quote from: Karl Marx
At a certain high point this increasing concentration in its turn causes a new fall in the rate of profit. The mass of small dispersed capitals is thereby driven along the adventurous road of speculation, credit frauds, stock swindles, and crises. The so-called plethora of capital always applies essentially to a plethora of the capital for which the fall in the rate of profit is not compensated through the mass of profit — this is always true of newly developing fresh offshoots of capital — or to a plethora which places capitals incapable of action on their own at the disposal of the managers of large enterprises in the form of credit.

... If the rate of profit falls, there follows, on the one hand, an exertion of capital in order that the individual capitalists, through improved methods, etc., may depress the value of their individual commodity below the social average value and thereby realise an extra profit at the prevailing market-price. On the other hand, there appears swindling and a general promotion of swindling by recourse to frenzied ventures with new methods of production, new investments of capital, new adventures, all for the sake of securing a shred of extra profit which is independent of the general average and rises above it.
marx just salty that noone liked him and that he was too conceited to accept the jobs offered to him
 :success
XO

Premium Lager

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #18 on: April 20, 2017, 01:22:53 AM »
Thanks for the morning laugh :lol

benjipwns

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #19 on: April 20, 2017, 01:28:19 AM »
so the only reason it's internet connected is to check the QR code? couldn't it like...use a satellite time clock?
meowr

benjipwns

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #20 on: April 20, 2017, 01:29:59 AM »
marx just salty that noone liked him and that he was too conceited to accept the jobs offered to him
 :success
funds were what Engels was for

and translations I guess
meowr

Great Rumbler

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #21 on: April 20, 2017, 01:39:33 AM »
so the only reason it's internet connected is to check the QR code? couldn't it like...use a satellite time clock?

Internet of things! Meeble meeble meeble! One of us! ONE OF US!!
dog

benjipwns

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #22 on: April 20, 2017, 01:42:07 AM »
it'd pretty cool if they could find a way that it alters the QR code to tell you when it's actually gone bad rather than the normal expiration date guess which has some extreme latitudes depending on the manufacturer

when do i get the $120 million?
meowr

Kara

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #23 on: April 20, 2017, 01:59:12 AM »
The title is also a pun on late capitalism, but it wasn't clear to me if that was intended.

The intent of the title is to indicate that capitalism will not die in the chaotic flames of socialist revolution, but slowly drown in a sea of overproduced IoT junk designed specifically to appeal to venture capitalists and no one else.

Here I was fretting that you were a FRANKFURT SCHOOL CULTURAL MARXIST when in fact you accept the tenets of dialectical materialism. Good to know this forum's moderation is in the right hands. :whew

benjipwns

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #24 on: April 20, 2017, 02:06:57 AM »
You don't become the People's Commissariat of Internal Affairs of Yum Brands! without being well versed in the synthesis of correct thought.
meowr

ToxicAdam

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #25 on: April 20, 2017, 02:18:44 PM »
Cue Cat! That's a name I haven't heard in forever. Back when Wired was my bible.




zomgee

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #26 on: April 20, 2017, 02:23:54 PM »
I still have my CueCat!
rub

Syph

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #27 on: April 20, 2017, 05:20:22 PM »
marx just salty that noone liked him and that he was too conceited to accept the jobs offered to him
 :success
funds were what Engels was for

and translations I guess
circumlocutory translations...(more like that was marx in the first place smh)
XO

Let's Cyber

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #28 on: April 20, 2017, 07:01:58 PM »

Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #29 on: April 20, 2017, 07:58:42 PM »
I just buy stuff to get a momentary endorphin rush that I would otherwise have to accomplish something in order to achieve. Is that so wrong?

zomgee

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #30 on: April 20, 2017, 08:11:55 PM »
I just buy stuff to get a momentary endorphin rush that I would otherwise have to accomplish something in order to achieve. Is that so wrong?

Just get your wallet out and squeeze it over the garbage disposal until your money gets shredded. You get the same effect.
rub

Olivia Wilde Homo

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #31 on: April 20, 2017, 08:15:49 PM »
Still not as satisfying as the debacle known as Soylent.
8===D

Trurl

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #32 on: April 20, 2017, 08:38:49 PM »
I don't know anything about how Soylent turned out, but at least there was something to its pitch.  Maybe it's no better than drinking something like Ensure I guess.

Olivia Wilde Homo

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #33 on: April 20, 2017, 08:43:30 PM »
I don't know anything about how Soylent turned out, but at least there was something to its pitch.  Maybe it's no better than drinking something like Ensure I guess.

Ensure + Silicon Valley + rat shit
8===D

I'm a Puppy!

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #34 on: April 20, 2017, 08:48:24 PM »
Message from the CEO

https://medium.com/@Juicero/a-note-from-juiceros-new-ceo-cb23a1462b03

 :kobeyuck :crowdlaff
So much :confused in this.

Try to solve obesity with fruit juice brehs :doge
que

Yeti

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #35 on: April 20, 2017, 08:58:04 PM »
Still not as satisfying as the debacle known as Soylent.

When Kara went on one of his longer hiatuses I was pretty sure it was because he died from eating tainted Soylent.
WDW

Great Rumbler

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #36 on: April 20, 2017, 11:12:02 PM »
Drinking Soylent is basically admitting that you have given up on trying to derive any actual joy from the act of living.
dog

jakefromstatefarm

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #37 on: April 20, 2017, 11:25:27 PM »
Drinking Soylent is basically admitting that you have given up on trying to derive any actual joy from the act of living.
but this is exactly why I find it so appealing!

Premium Lager

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I'm a Puppy!

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #39 on: April 21, 2017, 04:00:43 PM »
If you want to tank a stock there are more effective and efficient ways to accomplish that :snob
que

Rufus

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #40 on: April 21, 2017, 07:44:54 PM »
Yeah, but what if you're a psycho? Suddenly a whole other world of possibilities opens up!

chronovore

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #41 on: April 24, 2017, 06:58:09 AM »
Cue Cat! That's a name I haven't heard in forever. Back when Wired was my bible.

Nice; I also have a collection of ur-WIRED, otherwise known as MONDO 2000.

chronovore

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #42 on: April 24, 2017, 06:58:59 AM »
Drinking Soylent is basically admitting that you have given up on trying to derive any actual joy from the act of living.

Is that why Kara bought stock in the company?  :doge

Trent Dole

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #43 on: April 24, 2017, 11:57:12 AM »
This is just Silicon Valley's latest Cue Cat.

DMCA to protect ink jet cartridges are another idea which needs to be shot in the head. Is that gone yet? I want to know, but if I look, I'll rabbit hole for another hour.
I had to look this up. :doge
spoiler (click to show/hide)
Click the URLDOGE
Hi

Joe Molotov

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #44 on: April 24, 2017, 12:05:29 PM »
Quote
he CueCat was invented by J. Jovan Philyaw, who changed his name to J. Hutton Pulitzer.

Because J. Jonah Jameson was already taken.
©@©™

CatsCatsCats

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #45 on: April 24, 2017, 06:06:07 PM »
This is just Silicon Valley's latest Cue Cat.

DMCA to protect ink jet cartridges are another idea which needs to be shot in the head. Is that gone yet? I want to know, but if I look, I'll rabbit hole for another hour.
I had to look this up. :doge
spoiler (click to show/hide)
Click the URLDOGE

Oh now I'm wondering how many other times the doge hid urls  :ohhh
😽💨

chronovore

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #46 on: April 25, 2017, 04:44:53 AM »
This is just Silicon Valley's latest Cue Cat.

DMCA to protect ink jet cartridges are another idea which needs to be shot in the head. Is that gone yet? I want to know, but if I look, I'll rabbit hole for another hour.
I had to look this up. :doge
spoiler (click to show/hide)
Click the URLDOGE

Oh now I'm wondering how many other times the doge hid urls  :ohhh

:neo
« Last Edit: April 27, 2017, 08:01:12 PM by chronovore »

Steve Contra

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #47 on: April 26, 2017, 05:11:36 PM »
Sometimes it's just too beautiful to stand

https://twitter.com/IvankaTrump/status/715648874346520576
vin

Rufus

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #48 on: April 26, 2017, 05:18:19 PM »
*cash register noise


etiolate

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #50 on: May 05, 2017, 04:07:19 PM »
I'm offended that any man of taste would think Popeye's chicken would need anything added. Plus, how well does cocaine pair with hot sauce and slaw? For shame!

toku

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T234

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #52 on: May 06, 2017, 12:37:14 PM »
I'm offended that any man of taste would think Popeye's chicken would need anything added. Plus, how well does cocaine pair with hot sauce and slaw? For shame!


I've done quite a bit of cocaine, I never once felt as though I wanted to eat anything during it but pussy.
UK

Great Rumbler

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dog

toku

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etiolate

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #55 on: May 07, 2017, 11:55:10 PM »
I went to a Dutch Bros Coffee today and the experience made me think of this thread and Tom Haverford from P&R.

toku

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recursivelyenumerable

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QED

Great Rumbler

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #58 on: May 14, 2017, 10:44:05 PM »
:ohhh
dog

recursivelyenumerable

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Re: #latestagecapitalism
« Reply #59 on: May 15, 2017, 04:46:35 AM »
Def one of the more easily circumvented DRM systems
QED