I'm not good at giving women gifts. What to give my mother for Mother's Day?

[Himu]

Please help!~ My price range is 60 dollars maximum!

[Mupepe]

my tongue down her throat.

[Himu]

Eat my man juice, semen sipper!

[Madrun Badrun]

I'm helping my mom rake leafs at the cabin  - I didn't want to go out to get something and in the last year she hasn't touched any of her birthday or xmas presents. 

[Vizzys]

A vacuum

[Saint Cornelius]

this is what I got your mom last year - it's the gift that keeps on giving (besides herpes. and luggage)!

I'm helping my mom rake leafs at the cabin

yeah yeah, you sick fucker. 

[Himu]

If only giving my mommy a hug would suffice

[demi]

A GAF membership

[Himu]

(Image removed from quote.)


this is what I got your mom last year - it's the gift that keeps on giving (besides herpes. and luggage)!

I'm helping my mom rake leafs at the cabin

yeah yeah, you sick fucker. 

what the fuck?

[cloudwalking]

only 60 bucks?

[Saint Cornelius]

only 60 bucks?

no £3.99

[Himu]

only 60 bucks?

What the hell is wrong with 60 bucks

[Saint Cornelius]

[cloudwalking]

only 60 bucks?

What the hell is wrong with 60 bucks

be a good son. get her something expensive

[Saint Cornelius]

be a good son. get her something expensive

but he only has 60 bucks. work with him cloudy, you slut

[Himu]

I'm not getting her anything more than 60 dollars. I skipped on paying for gas this week for this.

[cloudwalking]

you'll always be remembered as the son who didn't spend enough.

[Mupepe]

damn himuro, are you that broke that you had to skip buying gas?  what do you spend your money on?  it's all that anime isn't it?

[Himu]

damn himuro, are you that broke that you had to skip buying gas?  what do you spend your money on?  it's all that anime isn't it?

No. I'm really only fucking around. I am limiting myself to 60 dollars BECAUSE I'M CHEAP.

[Himu]

you'll always be remembered as the son who didn't spend enough.

I'm not trying to get into my mom's cooter, ok?

[Saint Cornelius]

so you're not trying to help her "rake leaves at the cabin", then?

[Himu]

[cloudwalking]

ok but seriously, there is a lot of stuff you can buy for 60 bucks:

general shit women like:

- clothes
- handbags
- jewelry
- chocolate
- bath/shower stuff

another good idea would be to use the $60 on a gift certificate for something she'd be unlikely to treat herself to, like a massage parlor or a nice restaurant.

less than $60:

- buy ingredients and cook her dinner
- do all the household chores
- breakfast in bed
- if you're handy, fix up some things around the house

or mix it up. you could just get her some mother's day flowers, do all of her usual chores for her, and make her a nice dinner. bam. cheap and easy and you didn't even spend the whole $60.

and don't forget to say "i love you mom"

[Saint Cornelius]

and a little oral wouldn't hurt. what's up with your pops?

[Himu]

He's too fat to try that stuff, I'd fear for their life if they attempted to have sex these days.

[Saint Cornelius]

so hook her up then! it's not like you aren't familar with her vagina.

...i mean you're not adopted, rite?

[Cheebs]

He's too fat to try that stuff, I'd fear for their life if they attempted to have sex these days.

Buy her a online dating account to find herself a nice man to have an affair with then.

[Himu]

so hook her up then! it's not like you aren't familar with her vagina.

...i mean you're not adopted, rite?

I wasn't born from her vag. They did a c-section.

[cloudwalking]

himu, take my advice, you fucker. your mom will be so thrilled she'll be lusting after you

[Cheebs]

seems like everyone here agrees Himu wants in her pants

[Madrun Badrun]

so you're not trying to help her "rake leaves at the cabin", then?

Jerk.  You know you only came into this thread for gift ideas for old ladies, because their the only ones you have a chance of getting. 

[Cheebs]

so you're not trying to help her "rake leaves at the cabin", then?

Jerk.  You know you only came into this thread for gift ideas for old ladies, because their the only ones you have a chance of getting. 

pics of your mom plz

[Madrun Badrun]

so hook her up then! it's not like you aren't familar with her vagina.

...i mean you're not adopted, rite?

I wasn't born from her vag. They did a c-section.

Then you can knock the price down to $50 then.  C-section = - $10.

[Himu]

I AM NOT SIGMUND FREUD, OKAY?!!!?

[Cheebs]

I AM NOT SIGMUND FREUD, OKAY?!!!?

whats her cup size, you live at home check one of her bras right now.

[Saint Cornelius]

your mom will be so thrilled she'll be lusting after you

that's what i'm saying!

Jerk.  You know you only came into this thread for gift ideas for old ladies, because their the only ones you have a chance of getting. 

yo what's wrong with older women?

[Himu]

I AM NOT SIGMUND FREUD, OKAY?!!!?

whats her cup size, you live at home check one of her bras right now.

at school and NO

[Madrun Badrun]

I AM NOT SIGMUND FREUD, OKAY?!!!?

I thought all blackmen wanted to have sex with their moms, something about monkey jeans or something.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

You know monkey jeans, the pants that make a girls ass look like a baboon, no true blackman can resist that....that was a lot funnier in my head,lol.

[close]

[Saint Cornelius]

does she have big titties because if so, that pearl necklace should be no prob whatev

[Phoenix Dark]

I think I'm going to get my mom a book. Right now she's reading Hillary's boo ( she luuuuvs Hillary) so I think I'll get her Obama's first book

[Mupepe]

I can confirm Himuro's mom is hot.

Saint: She has some gigantic fucking tits.

[Saint Cornelius]

WORD

[Mupepe]

this thread title should be changed to "I'm not good at giving cunnilingus.  What to give my mother for Mother's day then?"

[Himu]

AUUUUUGH!

[cloudwalking]

himu, my advice was serious, if you couldn't tell

[Cheebs]

AUUUUUGH!

when you get home, check one her bras.

[Mupepe]

himu, my advice was serious, if you couldn't tell

Yeah.  Cloud's advice was solid dude.  Doing the ABC's really does work.

[Madrun Badrun]

himu, my advice was serious, if you couldn't tell

Is that what you got your mom?  Girl-girl incest is kind of hawt 

[Himu]

*screams*

[cloudwalking]

well, my mom is pretty hot.

[Mupepe]

your mom is a screamer?  i bet that was hard to deal with when you were little

[Himu]

himu, my advice was serious, if you couldn't tell

Is that what you got your mom?  Girl-girl incest is kind of hawt 

who do you think can hold more cum

cloud or her mom

[Cheebs]

People tell me my mom is hot. It's kinda weird.

[Madrun Badrun]

your mom is a screamer?  i bet that was hard to deal with when you were little

    Now thats going to far. 

[Mupepe]

himu, my advice was serious, if you couldn't tell

Is that what you got your mom?  Girl-girl incest is kind of hawt 

who do you think can hold more cum

cloud or my mom

your mom definitely.  gallons

[Himu]

you have gallons of cum?!

Go mom!

[Cheebs]

HIMUMU get some damn bra size for us when you get home

[Madrun Badrun]

People tell me my mom is hot. It's kinda weird.

Do people say that as they walk out of her bedroom while zipping up their pants?  Do they also fallow up that statement with "well son, at least collage is payed for you". 

[Madrun Badrun]

himu, my advice was serious, if you couldn't tell

Is that what you got your mom?  Girl-girl incest is kind of hawt 

who do you think can hold more cum

cloud or her mom

Cloud is burning for the man juice, I mean why else would she stalk people? 

[Saint Cornelius]

Yeah.  Cloud's advice was solid dude.  Doing the ABC's really does work.

OMFG I was going to say that. Sam Kinison fan?