Random talk thread: It just keeps happening

[BIONIC]

I bought a bottle of apple cider vinegar and thought it was already diluted. drank about half the bottle before reading the label saying "take 1 tablespoon a day". this is not the first time I've done this 

[Potato]

Got the blood drawn today. How the fuck is it 2022 and we're using fucking needles like barbarians. Cant they just test my poo or something

Speaking of barbarianism, do you have any idea how you take a stool sample? You'll prefer the needle...trust me.

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[Potato]

they collect the sample off the end of potato's dick after he fucks your ass 

That's one way. Gotta go deep for that though.

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[james]

Got the blood drawn today. How the fuck is it 2022 and we're using fucking needles like barbarians. Cant they just test my poo or something

Speaking of barbarianism, do you have any idea how you take a stool sample? You'll prefer the needle...trust me.

I assume you poop into a toilet and when you're done the hot nurse fishes it out with a large spoon

[samir]

You have to fish it out yourself with the smallest spoon known to man and put it in a tiny test tube and spill shit all over yourself before giving it to the hot nurse.

[Potato]

a true greek 

Only gay if you're receiving

[Potato]

Got the blood drawn today. How the fuck is it 2022 and we're using fucking needles like barbarians. Cant they just test my poo or something

Speaking of barbarianism, do you have any idea how you take a stool sample? You'll prefer the needle...trust me.

I assume you poop into a toilet and when you're done the hot nurse fishes it out with a large spoon

Usually you have to place some sort of plastic screen over the water, shit onto that and then fish it out with a tiny spoon while covering your hands with your own shit.

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[james]

I thought the tiny spoon stuff was a joke but now I'm sus

[Potato]

I thought the tiny spoon stuff was a joke but now I'm sus

https://www.nhs.uk/common-health-questions/infections/how-should-i-collect-and-store-a-stool-faeces-sample/

To collect the sample:

• label a clean, screw-top container with your name, date of birth and the date
• place something in the toilet to catch the poo, such as a potty or an empty plastic food container, or spread clean newspaper or plastic wrap over the rim of the toilet

• make sure the poo doesn't touch the inside of the toilet

• use the spoon or spatula that comes with the container to collect the poo, then screw the lid shut

• if you've been given a container, aim to fill around a third of it – that's about the size of a walnut if you're using your own container

• put anything you used to collect the poo in a plastic bag, tie it up and put it the bin

• wash your hands thoroughly with soap and warm running water

Recommended that you store it in your refrigerator

[james]

Why cant you just give them a tupperware with the fully intact poo

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[chronovore]

If someplace needs a stool sample, they should be giving you a kit for it, which has instructions on it. Call the office.

[james]

If someplace needs a stool sample, they should be giving you a kit for it, which has instructions on it. Call the office.

No the problem is they didn't want my poo they wanted blood

[Madrun Badrun]

Weathers at feels-like -18 right now.  WTF. 

[Raist]

Got the blood drawn today. How the fuck is it 2022 and we're using fucking needles like barbarians. Cant they just test my poo or something

Oh your poor thing.

Did they give you a lollipop and a spiderman plaster after that at least?

[james]

Got the blood drawn today. How the fuck is it 2022 and we're using fucking needles like barbarians. Cant they just test my poo or something

Oh your poor thing.

Did they give you a lollipop and a spiderman plaster after that at least?

In this economy?

No, I bring my own like a responsible adult

[james]

My friend from OnlyFans hasnt posted in a month Im worried about her 

[Rahxephon91]

On Sunday I finally moved out of my mom's basement I mean house into my own townhouse. So Im just doing a lot of moving on a very cheap budget as Im still shit with handling money. Luckily my job allowed me to use a work vehicle to do most of the transporting of furniture. Not like I had a ton.

But its all starting to come together.

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[james]

I'm in a zoom meeting and this woman who's half Japanese half European is 

[Potato]

I'm in a zoom meeting and this woman who's half Japanese half European is 

Screenshot bitch

[chronovore]

I'm in a zoom meeting and this woman who's half Japanese half European is 

“Goddamn those half-Japanese girls, they get me every time.”

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[Rahxephon91]

Shitty pictures of my new home:

https://imgur.com/a/Wslbqg9

[james]

Those curtains tho

[Rahxephon91]

They are just sheets. Temporarily.

Plenty of stuff I need to purchase.

[Nintex]

Shitty pictures of my new home:

https://imgur.com/a/Wslbqg9

Congrats you have all the essentials now get some plants

[chronovore]

I'm in a zoom meeting and this woman who's half Japanese half European is 

“Goddamn those half-Japanese girls, they get me every time.”

maria ozawa 

She’s stunningly pretty, but SO BORING.

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[Cauliflower Of Love]

More like Maria ozzzzzzzzzz

[Snoopycat_]

Cypress Hill and Jello Biafra are actual pensioners.

[Snoopycat_]

I was in line behind this guy who was having a right one because the carrier bags cost 20p. It was such a small thing to be upset about. Then I remembered I'd had a good rant the night before about the cost of Levi 501s. I guess it's all relative innit.

[Cauliflower Of Love]

My neighbor has this massive dog and she weighs like 80 lbs. 


I think I need to help her somehow.

[SmokyDave]

I sliced through my thumb yesterday. It was a deep cut, but I collect and use knives so nothing new. Later on I noticed I couldn’t bend my thumb. I grabbed the end and pulled on it.

Some time later, my wife found me face down in a pool of blood. Turns out that pulling my thumb made me immediately pass out, at which point I went face first on to the corner of my subwoofer. I’ve smashed my front teeth up into my gum line, broken my nose, and I’m fairly sure I’ve fractured my jaw.

Slept it off last night, now I’m on my way to hospital. Just thought I’d share my stupidity with y’all.

Silver lining: I’m fairly sure I had my nose broken about 25 years ago, and the fall last night has reset it. My breathing feels amazing and my nose looks better than it did. Nice.

[Transhuman]

Make sure to moan and cry a lot so they give you the good stuff

[Potato]

I sliced through my thumb yesterday. It was a deep cut, but I collect and use knives so nothing new. Later on I noticed I couldn’t bend my thumb. I grabbed the end and pulled on it.

Some time later, my wife found me face down in a pool of blood. Turns out that pulling my thumb made me immediately pass out, at which point I went face first on to the corner of my subwoofer. I’ve smashed my front teeth up into my gum line, broken my nose, and I’m fairly sure I’ve fractured my jaw.

Slept it off last night, now I’m on my way to hospital. Just thought I’d share my stupidity with y’all.

Silver lining: I’m fairly sure I had my nose broken about 25 years ago, and the fall last night has reset it. My breathing feels amazing and my nose looks better than it did. Nice.

When you recover, post pics of knives.

[SmokyDave]

I already have the good stuff, that’s why I could wait 12 hours with a broken face 

I’ll post some knife pics at some point. The blade that started this shit was a QSP Phoenix in OD Green. Nice knife, sharp as fuck.

[HardcoreRetro]

You don't have one of those leather thimbles? Gotta protect yourself.

[Cauliflower Of Love]

I sliced through my thumb yesterday. It was a deep cut, but I collect and use knives so nothing new.

 

Should probably find a new hobby.

[bork]

Filler is now taking a two week vacation for his recent behavior, in case anyone asks.

[Transhuman]

That sounds nice where's he going?

[bork]

I already have the good stuff, that’s why I could wait 12 hours with a broken face 

I’ll post some knife pics at some point. The blade that started this shit was a QSP Phoenix in OD Green. Nice knife, sharp as fuck.

Glad you're OK man.  Careful with the knives!   

Was looking for something myself recently and tried out some different knives.  I liked the Civivi Elementum and the QSP Penguin.  Tried some more expensive Elementum variants, and they either felt too heavy/clunky or surprisingly cheap despite the higher price.  I tried the Civivi Nox (framelock style, initially was kinda hard to open but seems smooth now) and the Exarch too (cool front flipper design, but also seems flawed and felt like it would be too easy to come open in a pocket).  But I don't need all this shit so most of it is going back.  Keeping the Penguin since it cuts great for the price- sharper than the Elementum for sure.  Might hang onto the Nox too.

On the real cheap end of the spectrum, I like the Gerber Quadrant (looks like a shaving razor and has zero assisted open, but I don't mind this.  Feels safer that way.) and the Keysmart Dapper 150.  It's a cheapo $16 knife, but feels pretty premium with an anodized aluminum housing.  It's basically a Swiss Army Knife blade inside and opens the same way.  Really nice and good for opening stuff.  There's a tinier keychain version that I also ordered.  I also have couple of Pocket Samurai knives.  They're also keychain sized and really sharp.  Comes in super handy for opening stuff.

But this is my favorite:

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

They made a pocket knife that looks like the Tesla Cyber Truck. 


I got the cheaper micarta handle version and it cuts great- I need something for opening and breaking down boxes, and this is fantastic.  The micarta feels cheaper than the budget knives, but it cuts like butter and seems to be perfect for dealing with packages, so I'm keeping it.  Like it enough that I went and ordered the titanium version too.

[Potato]

I like knives, but don't own too many.

I did get this custom made hunting knife though


Made by a guy who used to make custom knives for Holland and Holland (high end gun manufacturers).

[bork]

I like knives, but don't own too many.

I did get this custom made hunting knife though
(Image removed from quote.)

Made by a guy who used to make custom knives for Holland and Holland (high end gun manufacturers).

Do you go hunting?  If not, are you using that for food prep?

Recently wwe got some Korean BBQ and they wouldn't provide us with knives ( ) so I had to rip up stuff with my hands for my 1.5 year-old daughter to eat.  A pocket knife sure would have come in handy, although I would have wanted to have it cleaned first anyway so dunno if it would have really helped. 

[Pissy F Benny]

I like knives, but don't own too many.

I did get this custom made hunting knife though
(Image removed from quote.)

Made by a guy who used to make custom knives for Holland and Holland (high end gun manufacturers).

Do you go hunting?  If not, are you using that for food prep?

Recently wwe got some Korean BBQ and they wouldn't provide us with knives ( ) so I had to rip up stuff with my hands for my 1.5 year-old daughter to eat.  A pocket knife sure would have come in handy, although I would have wanted to have it cleaned first anyway so dunno if it would have really helped.

[Potato]

I like knives, but don't own too many.

I did get this custom made hunting knife though
(Image removed from quote.)

Made by a guy who used to make custom knives for Holland and Holland (high end gun manufacturers).

Do you go hunting?

Yep. Bought it as an all-rounder. Still haven't used it because one of the other guys I go with usually does the field dressing.

[chronovore]

I sliced through my thumb yesterday. It was a deep cut, but I collect and use knives so nothing new. Later on I noticed I couldn’t bend my thumb. I grabbed the end and pulled on it.

Some time later, my wife found me face down in a pool of blood. Turns out that pulling my thumb made me immediately pass out, at which point I went face first on to the corner of my subwoofer. I’ve smashed my front teeth up into my gum line, broken my nose, and I’m fairly sure I’ve fractured my jaw.

Slept it off last night, now I’m on my way to hospital. Just thought I’d share my stupidity with y’all.

Silver lining: I’m fairly sure I had my nose broken about 25 years ago, and the fall last night has reset it. My breathing feels amazing and my nose looks better than it did. Nice.

Just a heads-up, this reads like you had a head injury but decided to go to sleep and visit the hospital the next morning.  If that's true, please call an ambulance to take you to the hospital immediately. Going to sleep with a head injury may mean you don't wake up.

[bork]

I think I'm all knifed-out.  Civivi blades kind of suck- am returning all the ones I got to try out.  QSP shits all over them.  The cheap Penguin D2 cuts better than the Nitro-V the Nox has.  The damascus blade on the fancy Elementum I got does cut great, but it's the kind of thing where it looks so nice that you'd be afraid to use it and the handle just feels cheap and shitty despite the nice look.

The GOAT for me is Kizer.  Love the Lieb.  It's nice n' small, so it's not intimidating, but is super well-made and cuts great.  Cardboard boxes beware.

[Potato]

I know Gerber get shit on, but fuck me if this doesn't look very cool:

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Also, this is just very 

[close]

[bork]

I know Gerber get shit on, but fuck me if this doesn't look very cool:

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Also, this is just very 

[close]

I have a Quadrant.     This is the first knife I got and I'd probably return it if I still had the box, but it was like $25 so it's good enough to be a cheap 'beater knife.'  They look cool (super-thin, too), but the blade quality is either crap or so-so out of the box.  Would recommend the white handle one.  The bamboo handle on the other one apparently dings up easily.  It's supposed to be a flipper knife, but the mechanism is super stiff and it opens half-way.  You can just flick it when half-opened to get to lock into place, though.

These are the Kizer knives I ended up ordering.  Some of them are definitely

spoiler (click to show/hide)

TEH GOAT Lieb:


The Domin Mini:


The Mini Bay (it's really tiny):


The Walnut (also really tiny):


The Cyber Blade:

[close]

[Potato]

Loving the little box cutters.

In other news, I just signed off from work and don't go back until 26 April. Going on a family holiday to Adelaide which is one of the nicest cities in Australia and a short trip to places like this

[BIONIC]

I sliced through my thumb yesterday. It was a deep cut, but I collect and use knives so nothing new. Later on I noticed I couldn’t bend my thumb. I grabbed the end and pulled on it.

Some time later, my wife found me face down in a pool of blood. Turns out that pulling my thumb made me immediately pass out, at which point I went face first on to the corner of my subwoofer. I’ve smashed my front teeth up into my gum line, broken my nose, and I’m fairly sure I’ve fractured my jaw.

Slept it off last night, now I’m on my way to hospital. Just thought I’d share my stupidity with y’all.

Silver lining: I’m fairly sure I had my nose broken about 25 years ago, and the fall last night has reset it. My breathing feels amazing and my nose looks better than it did. Nice.

Just a heads-up, this reads like you had a head injury but decided to go to sleep and visit the hospital the next morning.  If that's true, please call an ambulance to take you to the hospital immediately. Going to sleep with a head injury may mean you don't wake up.

I’m starting to think he didn’t wake up 

[Joe Molotov]

RIP SmokyDave

[Transhuman]

Makes you think. The only person from here I have on Facebook is filler, so if i'm offline for a while and he says i'm dead you should believe him.

[chronovore]

I sliced through my thumb yesterday. It was a deep cut, but I collect and use knives so nothing new. Later on I noticed I couldn’t bend my thumb. I grabbed the end and pulled on it.

Some time later, my wife found me face down in a pool of blood. Turns out that pulling my thumb made me immediately pass out, at which point I went face first on to the corner of my subwoofer. I’ve smashed my front teeth up into my gum line, broken my nose, and I’m fairly sure I’ve fractured my jaw.

Slept it off last night, now I’m on my way to hospital. Just thought I’d share my stupidity with y’all.

Silver lining: I’m fairly sure I had my nose broken about 25 years ago, and the fall last night has reset it. My breathing feels amazing and my nose looks better than it did. Nice.

Just a heads-up, this reads like you had a head injury but decided to go to sleep and visit the hospital the next morning.  If that's true, please call an ambulance to take you to the hospital immediately. Going to sleep with a head injury may mean you don't wake up.

I’m starting to think he didn’t wake up 

Yeah, this was his most recent thread.

The reason I brought it up was my Mom. One of the earliest signs that she was not processing things right was the time I called her for a video chat, and she had a bandage on her head.
"Mom, what happened to your head?"
"Oh, I just woke up on the floor, and there was blood all over the place."
"WHAT, MOM, NO, WHAT HAPPENED?"
"Oh, don't worry. I drove myself to the hospital."
"WHAT, MOM, NO! YOU CALL A DAMNED AMBULANCE! Head injuries, you don't go for a goddamned drive."

So, yeah.

[james]

Hes not in my super secret discord, is he in anyone elses?