I need Facebook advice since I'm socially inept.
I finally bit the bullet and defriended a family member who lives across the country, who I didn't really "know" until the last couple of years, and who is a passive aggressive bitch that uses everything the family says online to cause drama. She's nice enough to the family (well those who still speak to her) so she can keep her drama loving claws dug in, then will stir up shit and let us locals deal with the aftermath. Usually this happens after a tragedy (when my brother died, when my grandma died, etc), but generally any other time when she isn't the center of attention. She's truly a horrible human being. I can't even convey all the shit she has done and said, same goes for her mother. Well, if this gives an idea, one time, she told my disabled brother, who struggled his entire short life, that she had it harder than him. Yup, she's a gem.
Well now its my birthday. What better time to harass me about defriending her? I get the message asking why in whatever reason would I have done such a thing. I even went through my privacy settings last week to make sure the option to receive messages from non-friends was turned off, but guess not. THANKS FB. Do I respond to this trash (on my birthday, sick no less)? If so, how? She's just like my dear sweet MIL so whatever I say will be null and voided cause NU UH DID NOT. The last time I talked to her, I told her off for talking about me behind my back, she tried denying it, couldn't, then started defending it, never apologized and I haven't heard from her since. That was last summer. She knows exactly why I bumped her, and I gave her ample time to cool off and apologize. Instead, she started talking about me to my mom again, like I wouldn't find out? (Well ok, we all know it was for her to start more drama, and drag my mom into it cause my mom just can't keep her big mouth shut!! How dare her!) My initial thought is to not respond because its going nowhere and will just stress me out. I thought about something vague about just limiting Facebook to close friends/family, but she will argue that she is close family DAMNIT.
The other issue is that my mom will have to deal with this too. So I can either tell this woman why, she can ignore it and deny her wrongdoing, then will go crying to my mom and her mom. My mom backs me 100% but is also a gentle, sweet, peacekeeping woman. Or I can ignore her, and my mom will still have to deal with her drama and questions. I'd delete the whole profile if it wasn't for family out of state that we actually like.
Wildcard option: let her stew until tomorrow, staring at that "Seen at 3:30" read receipt, planning her inevitable attack on my mom, then I message her tomorrow saying it was an inappropriate subject to bring up and deal with on my birthday. Then send her a link to some pretentious huffpo article about "Why you should un friend these 10 people" and let her figure out which category she falls under.