RELATIONSHIPS: helping wizards deplete their mana since 2011

[Bebpo]

What are some good modern dating apps? I've been told by the gals in my circle that gals these days have moved on from OKC and Tinder and are using Bumble and some other ones which may explain the wasteland of the opposite sex on OKC these days when I'm browsing. I feel like I wouldn't do well on Bumble simply because my height being short, which is why I've never done too well on anything where I'm not messaging first like OKC. Still up to give it a shot and maybe some other newer sites? I still use CmB and occasionally go on dates off it but it's pretty on/off, for every month of hundreds of women I like, I get like 1 match/month of someone liking me back and usually end up going on a date with them after some messaging.

Man, I really don't want to go back to all the bs of online dating, but just not feeling anything currently going on. Have one more gal to go on a first date with probably this week, but I've talked on the phone with her and probably not interested (plus she has a kid and I'm still not sure if I'm up for dating anyone with kids yet), and a client wants me to come have dinner with them and their hot single daughter this week but I find stuff like that so awkward. I've always declined that kinda stuff, but I might give it a shot this time.

[BlueTsunami]

me and the gf were too lazy to figure out when we first started dating officially so we made up a date up

Smarch 69

[Assimilate]

What are some good modern dating apps? I've been told by the gals in my circle that gals these days have moved on from OKC and Tinder and are using Bumble and some other ones which may explain the wasteland of the opposite sex on OKC these days when I'm browsing. I feel like I wouldn't do well on Bumble simply because my height being short, which is why I've never done too well on anything where I'm not messaging first like OKC. Still up to give it a shot and maybe some other newer sites? I still use CmB and occasionally go on dates off it but it's pretty on/off, for every month of hundreds of women I like, I get like 1 match/month of someone liking me back and usually end up going on a date with them after some messaging.

Man, I really don't want to go back to all the bs of online dating, but just not feeling anything currently going on. Have one more gal to go on a first date with probably this week, but I've talked on the phone with her and probably not interested (plus she has a kid and I'm still not sure if I'm up for dating anyone with kids yet), and a client wants me to come have dinner with them and their hot single daughter this week but I find stuff like that so awkward. I've always declined that kinda stuff, but I might give it a shot this time.

Please, do share your Bumble experiences on TheBore. 

[team filler]

What are some good modern dating apps? I've been told by the gals in my circle that gals these days have moved on from OKC and Tinder and are using Bumble and some other ones which may explain the wasteland of the opposite sex on OKC these days when I'm browsing. I feel like I wouldn't do well on Bumble simply because my height being short, which is why I've never done too well on anything where I'm not messaging first like OKC. Still up to give it a shot and maybe some other newer sites? I still use CmB and occasionally go on dates off it but it's pretty on/off, for every month of hundreds of women I like, I get like 1 match/month of someone liking me back and usually end up going on a date with them after some messaging.

Man, I really don't want to go back to all the bs of online dating, but just not feeling anything currently going on. Have one more gal to go on a first date with probably this week, but I've talked on the phone with her and probably not interested (plus she has a kid and I'm still not sure if I'm up for dating anyone with kids yet), and a client wants me to come have dinner with them and their hot single daughter this week but I find stuff like that so awkward. I've always declined that kinda stuff, but I might give it a shot this time.

plenty of fish 

[Assimilate]

What are some good modern dating apps? I've been told by the gals in my circle that gals these days have moved on from OKC and Tinder and are using Bumble and some other ones which may explain the wasteland of the opposite sex on OKC these days when I'm browsing. I feel like I wouldn't do well on Bumble simply because my height being short, which is why I've never done too well on anything where I'm not messaging first like OKC. Still up to give it a shot and maybe some other newer sites? I still use CmB and occasionally go on dates off it but it's pretty on/off, for every month of hundreds of women I like, I get like 1 match/month of someone liking me back and usually end up going on a date with them after some messaging.

Man, I really don't want to go back to all the bs of online dating, but just not feeling anything currently going on. Have one more gal to go on a first date with probably this week, but I've talked on the phone with her and probably not interested (plus she has a kid and I'm still not sure if I'm up for dating anyone with kids yet), and a client wants me to come have dinner with them and their hot single daughter this week but I find stuff like that so awkward. I've always declined that kinda stuff, but I might give it a shot this time.

plenty of fish 

I had a close friend that turned to plenty of fish after many rejections on the other apps because of his height.

He threw in the towel, got on plenty of fish, and starting meeting up with 40-50 year olds at the tender age of 28. 

[team filler]

 

[Huff]

Hinge is one I haven’t seen you mention before that’s started as a friend of friend thing using Facebook info, but it may have changed a bit

[Tasty]

bebps you'd kill it on Grindr.

[Valkyrie]

Is Grindr for males only or do gay girls use it too?

[Kara]

The lesbians I know use Tinder.

[seagrams hotsauce]

grindr for lesbians would just be grindr but you could cosign a lease with your matches

[Atramental]

Had a 2nd date with pot girl again. It was a fun/okay time overall but I can tell I’m basically phoning it in and my interest in her is waning.

Managed to kiss her this time but it was only one peck on the lips and not the usual make out sesh. 

She seems down to meet up again and we might try taking a day trip up to Asheville but I dunno...

I feel like I should just call it quits and move onto someone else so I’m not wasting our time. 

[BlueTsunami]

That dynamic is going to 100% become a hassle if you fade away vs tell her outright. Maybe take a cue from heroin girl and say you have a girlfriend or something

[Assimilate]

Nah listen to Exodust.

[Olivia Wilde Homo]

Had a 2nd date with pot girl again

not the usual make out sesh.

 

[Mupepe]

I agree with riding it out. It’s all experience and if you’re not leading her on to think it’s something more then no harm.

[BlueTsunami]

Give her the half pipe just in case

[BlueTsunami]

HEARTS WILL BREAK

[toku]

dont think at all

[team filler]

eat her ass

[I'm a Puppy!]

eat my ass.

[nudemacusers]

Had a 2nd date with pot girl again. It was a fun/okay time overall but I can tell I’m basically phoning it in and my interest in her is waning.

Managed to kiss her this time but it was only one peck on the lips and not the usual make out sesh. 

She seems down to meet up again and we might try taking a day trip up to Asheville but I dunno...

I feel like I should just call it quits and move onto someone else so I’m not wasting our time. 

Bang to be sure... When you go to the bathroom after to piss/cleanup and you look in the mirror and question your morality and self-worth then you’ll know it wasn’t meant to be.

[CatsCatsCats]

Radical idea: become smoke buddies

[Mupepe]

Have her peg you.

I like this twist

[Assimilate]

And I'm sure Atra will find the twist itself eye opening.

You speak from experience?

[chronovore]

No, your brand of heel is just annoying, doesn’t get a proper rise from me; however, I am slightly triggered at my phononym mistake up there.

It's cool. The Bore is flexible on their "no homophone" rule.

[CatsCatsCats]

Oh jeez I even went and got that word wrong, too

[chronovore]

But you’re going to fuck her and get that milk right?

Sounds great in theory, but it could be a letdown.

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/letdown

Guys let's restore the good vibes in this thread by going back and liking Mandark's pun.

How long are you planning on milking that joke?

[Tasty]

DADS STAHP

[Tasty]

I often wonder if I'm too independent (selfish) for a long-term relationship. Does anyone else get this feeling sometimes?

[VomKriege]

That's too vague, it really depends on the dynamic and the other person ?

[Tasty]

As an example, the impression I get is that most S/Os, after a certain point, expect at least some amount of text messaging every day. But there were times when days passed and I didn't even think of my last boyfriend for a 1-3 days at a time. I'm content with being focused on my own stuff and not really actively reaching out to discuss what's going on with them. It's a mixture of lack of focus and lack of caring, and I'm concerned it's a character fault of mine.

[Mandark]

But you’re going to fuck her and get that milk right?

Sounds great in theory, but it could be a letdown.

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/letdown

Guys let's restore the good vibes in this thread by going back and liking Mandark's pun.

How long are you planning on milking that joke?

You might read the threads whole, but many posters just skim, so their odds of seeing that joke are about half and half.

[VomKriege]

As an example, the impression I get is that most S/Os, after a certain point, expect at least some amount of text messaging every day. But there were times when days pass and I didn't even think of my last boyfriend for a 1-3 days at a time. I'm content with being focused on my own stuff and not really actively reaching out to discuss what's going on with them. It's a mixture of lack of focus and lack of caring, and I'm concerned it's a character fault of mine.

Oh it starts as soon as the texting
But is it really a flaw or a fault though ? It's true that beyond a certain line a "serious" relationship will call for dedication and commitment. But is it what you want really ? At the beginning (and texting a few weeks in is the beginning) things should flow naturally IMHO. If they don't I am not sure that forcing it is healthy long term.

[naff]

But you’re going to fuck her and get that milk right?

Sounds great in theory, but it could be a letdown.

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/letdown

Guys let's restore the good vibes in this thread by going back and liking Mandark's pun.

How long are you planning on milking that joke?

You might read the threads whole, but many posters just skim, so their odds of seeing that joke are about half and half.

i try. but generally when i pop into a thread for a nip, i quickly realise im intolerant

[Tasty]

The idea I have in mind is that if I really like the person, engaging in communication with them should remain near the top of my mind at all times, but I also worry that I'll either never meet the right person to bring that out of me, or that I'm incapable at all of caring enough about another person that I devote a consistent cognitive load to their existence over my own.

I do have limited dating experience though, so this all might be much ado about nothing.

[Purrp Skirrp]

Date thots with BPD.





 

[brawndolicious]

Date thots with BPD.
 

If someone doesn't view their mental health and its effects on others as their own responsibility, then you have no choice even if you feel like you could help them.

TOTHOTsOT

[Bebpo]

As an example, the impression I get is that most S/Os, after a certain point, expect at least some amount of text messaging every day. But there were times when days passed and I didn't even think of my last boyfriend for a 1-3 days at a time. I'm content with being focused on my own stuff and not really actively reaching out to discuss what's going on with them. It's a mixture of lack of focus and lack of caring, and I'm concerned it's a character fault of mine.

I think that’s pretty normal for dating because a person you just met or have gone on a date or two with doesn’t necessarily become prime importance in your daily life.

But at least in my experience when you’re in an actual relationship, I find it weird to not think of the other person daily as your lives usually start to intertwine, though I’m sure some people keep their lives more separate, don’t live together and can go some time not thinking about the other.

[Phoenix Dark]

Have you ever considered sugar babies, Bebpo? 

[Tasty]

I mentioned in jest to a friend that I wanted to be a "Sugar Boy" and she couldn't stop laughing. Then I started laughing too.

[toku]

isn't the right term rent boy

[Tasty]

isn't the right term rent boy

It is, which is why we were laughing.

[BlueTsunami]

Sugar boy def sounds more dignified

[I'm a Puppy!]

As an example, the impression I get is that most S/Os, after a certain point, expect at least some amount of text messaging every day. But there were times when days passed and I didn't even think of my last boyfriend for a 1-3 days at a time. I'm content with being focused on my own stuff and not really actively reaching out to discuss what's going on with them. It's a mixture of lack of focus and lack of caring, and I'm concerned it's a character fault of mine.

Maybe you just haven't found someone that perpetually sparks the fire for you?
I mean realtionships take work, that's true. But it's a "work" not a "job" if that makes sense.

Edit: Of course, I do know people that really can't have relationships, I know it's not popular but I think  not everyone has the skills/deserves to love/be loved. But you don't strike me as one of those people at all.

[Bebpo]

Have you ever considered sugar babies, Bebpo? 

Not my thing, only living that true love life.

[Tasty]

Apparently in Boston it's common for str8 guys on Bumble to pose with fish? Like overwhelmingly so.

Is this the case anywhere else?

[HardcoreRetro]

I been playing a bunch of Yakuza 6 and all the hostess girls responded really well to talking about fishing. Might be something in it.

[Assimilate]

Apparently in Boston it's common for str8 guys on Bumble to pose with fish? Like overwhelmingly so.

Is this the case anywhere else?

Fish posing has been a thing for a while. Women do it to.

It shows you "fish" and like the outdoors. 

[Tasty]

The article I read lists posing with fish as a "thing" for men, and "travel, yoga, and wine" as common for women.

“If you looked at Tinder,” says Will Noonan, a 35-year-old comedian from Boston, “you’d think . . . every one of these women has gone to Africa and saved children.”

Apparently The Office is common with both.

Normies 🙄

[HardcoreRetro]

Do they get consent from the fish though?

[Tasty]

Do they get consent from the fish though?

The fish is dead by the time they pose with it, so probably not.

[CatsCatsCats]

Girls on elephants or with other endangered animals are super common too

Left swipe em all

[Tasty]

Posing with African kids was always a huge turn off for me.

Going to Africa to get pictures to make you look like a less reprehensible human on Tinder is not a humanitarian cause.

Is it really that widespread?

Tbf gay apps are fairly monotonous too but it's mostly either shirtless pics, pics taken in front of a bathroom mirror (sometimes combined with the first point), travel pics, and wedding pics (which are sometimes in black and white.)

[Assimilate]

Posing with African kids was always a huge turn off for me.

Going to Africa to get pictures to make you look like a less reprehensible human on Tinder is not a humanitarian cause.

Is it really that widespread?

Tbf gay apps are fairly monotonous too but it's mostly either shirtless pics, pics taken in front of a bathroom mirror (sometimes combined with the first point), travel pics, and wedding pics (which are sometimes in black and white.)

It was pretty rampant when I was dating. It typically lead to them telling me about their huge humanitarian trip to build schools in Sierra Leone, staying in living quarters the kids attending those schools would kill for spending a single night in.

They'd usually complain that they would have to sometimes spend the whole day standing in a line, passing a bag of cement to the person beside them. But like, you're a fucking hairdresser. Did you think you'd be driving heavy machinery there?

When i was young, early 20s and in college i thought this one girl that was super fucking hot was soooooooo amazing for doing that.

Little did i know she was just another typical dumb cunt doing it for her social media thing and to feel good about herself.

[Tasty]

I don't think there's anything wrong with feeling good about humanitarian efforts, nor leveraging it in the dating game, but it does ring a bit hollow when it's like a one-time thing and everyone else is doing it.

[TEEEPO]

in dc you'd see a lot of photos of white women in africa or with endangered species given that its their job and all. still, it didn't make it any better but at least in those pictures you'd get a better impression on how they'd really look like since there is less camera fuckery. i always found photos like that to be very strategic in nature in what they signal 

as for me, i purposefully chose group pictures so i could turn all my friends into juggalos for my tinder/okc pics. i'm pretty sure it turned off quite a few but it worked out amazingly well

[Tasty]

Groups pics are the woooooorst wat r u doing 

[TEEEPO]

not when all your friends are juggalos

[tiesto]

For me, I've found that the "Eat Pray Love" types - the ones who went to 30+ countries, studied with a yogi in Mysore, humanitarian efforts in Uganda, etc. weren't too much into me... Most of the women I ended up with rarely ventured out of NY. I mean, I'm not exactly world-weary, but I've gotten out of NY at least - most of my travel has tended to be all around the US/Canada, though I've been to London and Paris back in HS, and of course I am going to Japan in a few weeks.

One or two group pics are good, make it look like you have friends and aren't some creepy loner. I usually did ones of me doing activities (electronic music festivals, boat parties, balloon festival, wine tasting, etc), my girlfriend said she liked how I did that.