RELATIONSHIPS: helping wizards deplete their mana since 2011

[Kara]

What did you say to her when she sent you nudes, Atra?

[Atramental]

What did you say to her when she sent you nudes, Atra?

We were talking about tumblr and how it’s like a modern day scrap book (and also chocked full of porn).

Then she was saying how her tumblr profile is just full of selfies, nature pics, and also some pics of her butt. 

I just played it all off super casual, chuckled, and didn’t really say anything more.

I haven’t followed her profile yet but I do know the name of it.

[Atramental]

dp

[Mupepe]

dp

Yeah. Dp her at the rave

[Kara]

Then she was saying how her tumblr profile is just full of selfies, nature pics, and also some pics of her butt. 

I just played it all off super casual, chuckled, and didn’t really say anything more.

I s2g this fucking season.

[Atramental]

Oh, it gets even better...

But I’ll fill you guys in tomorrow since I need to wake up early for work.

[tiesto]

God, I love her (as a friend). 

Anyways, it was a fun and eventful day. And I'll probably be going to my first rave and trying MDMA for the first time ever next weekend. 

Nice, any big names playing?

[Atramental]

Oh yeah, fun facts:
-Possum Girl's ex looks like Ryan Gosling.
-Her ex has the same first name as me.
-There's still some photos of him hanging on the wall in her house.

God, I love her (as a friend). 

Anyways, it was a fun and eventful day. And I'll probably be going to my first rave and trying MDMA for the first time ever next weekend. 

Nice, any big names playing?

Nah, not really.

[Assimilate]

Oh yeah, fun facts:
-Possum Girl's ex looks like Ryan Gosling.
-Her ex has the same first name as me.
-There's still some photos of him hanging on the wall in her house.

God, I love her (as a friend). 

Anyways, it was a fun and eventful day. And I'll probably be going to my first rave and trying MDMA for the first time ever next weekend. 

Nice, any big names playing?

Nah, not really.

Atra, whip your dick out the next time she's high. Make sure it's rock and do it.

[VomKriege]

Boring C plot update : I've been on and off dating apps without much success. Finally had a match sticking, we're at the "agreed to take a drink sometime".

[Atramental]

Atra, whip your dick out the next time she's high. Make sure it's rock and do it.

I'm not going to sexually assault her. Jesus. 

[Atramental]

Does she ever shower when you are over?

No. 

But she did once jokingly say/text me to pick her up 15 minutes later from the agreed upon time since she would still be in a towel from a shower.

[Raist]

Oh yeah, fun facts:
-Possum Girl's ex looks like Ryan Gosling.
-Her ex has the same first name as me.
-There's still some photos of him hanging on the wall in her house.

Yikes.

[MMaRsu]

Fucking hell

Just when I was getting over this chick

I see her in the city on my bike home

 

Now Im sad

I wanted to stop and say hi to her, but I figured that would be too weird so I just went home and felt sad instead

[brawndolicious]

Atra, it sounds like this girl knows she's attractive. Those types are a lot less picky about superficial things.

[brawndolicious]

As opposed to all of these attractive people who don't know they are attractive.

There is a significant difference between somebody who thinks they are attractive enough for the average person and someone who thinks their pussy got handed the top pedestal in life.

[Atramental]

I'm pretty sure she knows she's attractive.

I mean, people who have low self-esteem, for their physical appearance, don't take selfies regularly. 

spoiler (click to show/hide)

I jokingly (i.e. low key snark-ly) said to her that she was "objectively pretty" when she was talking about people complimenting her looks. 

[close]

[CatsCatsCats]

Oh that’s hardly true

[Atramental]

Oh that’s hardly true

Perhaps.

I can't really speak for what goes on in the heads of women since I only pretend to be one on occasion. 

[Kara]

Boring C plot update : I've been on and off dating apps without much success. Finally had a match sticking, we're at the "agreed to take a drink sometime".

At this point it's the A plot since you're actually going on an explicitly romantic date.

You go to posting with the posters you have, not the posters you might want or wish to have at a later time.

[Assimilate]

Atra, whip your dick out the next time she's high. Make sure it's rock and do it.

Come on, man. Like I said, you’ve got to be a force for good in this world. I know you’ve got what it takes to make a difference in people’s lives. Telling him to pull a Harvey Weinstein, that ain’t it.

But i think it can work depending what Atra is rocking. If he's rocking a 7.5+ he should absolutely whip it out.

If he's rocking like a 6incher, ok maybe not.  His prowess won't really startle her into submission at that level.

Feel what i'm saying?

[I'm a Puppy!]

Yes. Please Atra. Everyone knows unsolicited dick always works wonders.

Pls post results.

[I'm a Puppy!]

Fucking hell

Just when I was getting over this chick

I see her in the city on my bike home

 

Now Im sad

I wanted to stop and say hi to her, but I figured that would be too weird so I just went home and felt sad instead

Kramit: Where asking if they like being choked is A-OK, but saying "Hi" it too weird.

[Kara]

Atra is jerking this thread around instead of Femme Atra shit posting so he'll just go "Guys I whipped it out. I'll post more tomorrow," and then after a series of 7 to 10 posts of digging the truth will be revealed as look it's fucking nothing dot gif. (Which is a good thing in this one instance.)

[Atramental]

I do like the friend route you bring up Glen;  but the combination of the "gay best friend" trope and the "friend zoned guy" trope w/ this character lead me to believe she's not the type to keep around attractive female friends.

(she’s bi)

But yeah, she has a lot of gay guy friends and a few lady friends who are either in relationships or they look rather butch. 

btw, I’m still using tinder and going out by myself to try & meet other girls since it’s pretty obvious that possum girl sees me just as a friend.

[Atramental]

One thing I will say, I can tell she's still pretty deep in recovery mode about her break up with her ex-bf of 4 years.

And the fact that she still has pics of him is a sign that he probably did the dumping and not her.

Also, she even said to me that I'd probably like him if I met him.

[CatsCatsCats]

Eeeeesh. Yeah, make her beg if she wants the D.

[Assimilate]

Just thinking of this in economic terms, I don't see whipping it out as the optimal strategy. It's a boom or bust option. Either she gets one look at the D and decides she wants to jump on it, or she's disgusted, and if this happens the best case scenario is that he loses a current friend, while the worst case scenario is he gets charged with a crime, and there's also a mid-case scenario where he doesn't get charged, but he does get outed on the internet and gains the reputation of being a sexual predator.

Based on a reading of the last couple weeks of this thread, I'd say a generous estimate of the likelihood that seeing Atra's D makes Possum Girl want to jump on it to be 25%. At best.

So if we assign utility values from -100 (jail time and sex offender registration status) to 10 (Atra getting laid), with the other outcomes being somewhere in the middle, the expected value for Atra isn't very good.

25% x 10 (she jumps on the D)
+ 50% x 0 (he just loses a friend)
+ 15% x -25 (he gets publicly outed as a pervert)
+ 10% x -100 (he gets charged with sexual assault)

Expected value comes out to -11.25. Now maybe the odds of getting charged with sexual assault aren't quite 10%, and maybe Atra is too low-profile of a person to really be outed, and maybe the odds of her jumping on the D are higher than 25%, but I'd still be shocked if there's a strong case for this strategy having a positive expected value in terms of Atra's utility.


I'd also be hard-pressed to see any way to assign the probabilities and utility values in which not whipping it out doesn't at least have an expected utility vale of zero. Literally the only one I can think of is if there's a non-remote chance that Atra's unrequited love for this girl causes him to jump off a bridge. And it probably has a positive expected value, since there's a non-zero chance that Possum Girl hooks him up with one of her friends if he just acts like a normal dude.

This entire analysis is bunk.

You didn't factor in Atras' D size. Depending on where it lands will differentiate those probability values a great deal.

If he whips out a glorious peace of rock hard wood his chances shoot up exponentially. If he brings out some mediocre bullshit then yeah he's probably getting charged with assault.

[Atramental]

My D is incredibly average and nothing to write home about. Trust me. 

[CatsCatsCats]

We’ll trust... butt verify

[Assimilate]

My D is incredibly average and nothing to write home about. Trust me. 

 

at least you're honest.

[Atramental]

We’ll trust... butt verify

Ask TIMU about it. To my knowledge, he's the only borean that's seen my pecker. 

spoiler (click to show/hide)

I mean beak.

[close]

[VomKriege]

Boring C plot update : I've been on and off dating apps without much success. Finally had a match sticking, we're at the "agreed to take a drink sometime".

At this point it's the A plot since you're actually going on an explicitly romantic date.

You go to posting with the posters you have, not the posters you might want or wish to have at a later time.

Chatting so far hasn't been as vapid as usual, certainly less forced and lively over two days. She lives pretty close by too and somehow this makes it all more plausible on the surface too. She took the suggestion of a drink in good spirits but I think she's still getting a feel at the moment (or waiting for a more opportune window than the middle of the week).

Don't worry Exodust, I'll let you know when your cheerleading paid off.

[Beezy]

btw, I’m still using tinder and going out by myself to try & meet other girls since it’s pretty obvious that possum girl sees me just as a friend (for now).

What happened to that big girl?

[Assimilate]

Disappointment washes across Assimilate’s face as the realization Attra has an average penis sets in.

yeah I was hoping I could convince him to whip it out in front of her

[Atramental]

btw, I’m still using tinder and going out by myself to try & meet other girls since it’s pretty obvious that possum girl sees me just as a friend (for now).

What happened to that big girl?

Radio Silence

[Atramental]

So... if on Saturday I end up taking MDMA with Possum Girl I'm not entirely sure what my lovely dovey uninhibited self might do.

Thoughts? 

[CatsCatsCats]

Expect nothing be open to everything

[BlueTsunami]

So... if on Saturday I end up taking MDMA with Possum Girl I'm not entirely sure what my lovely dovey uninhibited self might do.

Thoughts? 

If you find the night is tanking find another chick physically equivelent to possum girl to grind up on. But do not go after someone beneath her. You want to incite jealousy, not pity.

[I'm a Puppy!]

So... if on Saturday I end up taking MDMA with Possum Girl I'm not entirely sure what my lovely dovey uninhibited self might do.

Thoughts? 

If you find the night is tanking find another chick physically equivelent to possum girl to grind up on. But do not go after someone beneath her. You want to incite jealousy, not pity.

The rare good advice post in this thread.

[Mupepe]

fuck her in the butt

[Atramental]

she does have a nice butt 

spoiler (click to show/hide)

the last night I was with her she changed into her clothes to sleep in (a hoodie + some super short gym shorts). She had a group of friends there but while I was sitting on her couch (as pictured here). But... she walked past me a couple of times with her ass facing me. 

Granted, I just smoked a couple puffs of a joint her friends were passing around and I was super sleepy from a long day of driving to & from various places.

[close]

[Atramental]

Also, I hope I’m entertaining you guys with these updates.

It would be a shame if I was going through all this rigmarole just for my own amusement and no one else’s. 

[Mupepe]

Pretend to be gay so you can get close to her without setting off her spidey sense.  Wait a couple of years for her to really trust you and then get drunk and break down to her one night that you think you're into girls again while you two are doing your nails and drinking margaritas in PJ's.  A couple more drinks later and then you break down and tell her that it's her and she turned you straight (again).  But tell her you're not ready for vag sex yet.  You need to ease into it.  Just  BJ's and buttsex for a while.  That will really sell it.  If you're into it, get her to get a strap on too and really give it to you so you can seal the deal.

[Atramental]

Oh my god, possum girl is my own personal “tyler durden”. 

She’s so wild & free and I’m closed off & reserved. She’s constantly taking me places and doing things with me that would normally be outside my comfort zone if I was by myself. 

edit: I almost want to tell her about this revelation but I must refrain out of fear that she’ll disappear as soon as I make my alter ego aware that it is my alter ego. 

[I'm a Puppy!]

[nachobro]

Oh my god, possum girl is my own personal “tyler durden”. 

She’s so wild & free and I’m closed off & reserved. She’s constantly taking me places and doing things with me that would normally be outside my comfort zone if I was by myself. 

its cause she's hinting she wants you to stick it in, you prude

[Kara]

Also, I hope I’m entertaining you guys with these updates.

It would be a shame if I was going through all this rigmarole just for my own amusement and no one else’s. 

I think you should fork them to a new thread called "FRIENDSHIPS: helping people stay celibate since ca. 305." It's not a topical tale atm and it's very onanistic. hth.

[BlueTsunami]

she does have a nice butt 

spoiler (click to show/hide)

the last night I was with her she changed into her clothes to sleep in (a hoodie + some super short gym shorts). She had a group of friends there but while I was sitting on her couch (as pictured here). But... she walked past me a couple of times with her ass facing me. 

Granted, I just smoked a couple puffs of a joint her friends were passing around and I was super sleepy from a long day of driving to & from various places.

[close]

Should have broke into the infamous Heat monologue. If no one got it they werent cool anyways.

Oh my god, possum girl is my own personal “tyler durden”. 

She’s so wild & free and I’m closed off & reserved. She’s constantly taking me places and doing things with me that would normally be outside my comfort zone if I was by myself. 

edit: I almost want to tell her about this revelation but I must refrain out of fear that she’ll disappear as soon as I make my alter ego aware that it is my alter ego. 

This is all turning out 500 Days of Summer'ish

I can also see Zoe Deschennel owning an opposum... ironically

[Atramental]

What I can’t figure out is if she’s deliberately teasing me or she’s just so comfortable/body positive she doesn’t mind showing some skin to guys she just met. You know. The whole “free the nipple” or “clothing is not consent” stuff.

I’m leaning towards the latter.

Also, she talks so casually about sex its like she’s talking about the weather.

[Atramental]

Betting she fucks you once, but only once, insists on remaining friends, and it destroys you psychologically

Oh no. Anything but that.

If it’s just a one time thing I will no joke decline. It’s all or nothing for me.

Either we’re platonic friends or fucking on the reg

edit: I’m becoming hysterical. I’m no joke running on a hour of sleep and just need to take a snooze as soon as I get home from work.

[Atramental]

So... if on Saturday I end up taking MDMA with Possum Girl I'm not entirely sure what my lovely dovey uninhibited self might do.

Thoughts? 

Focus on maintaining your composure;  play it cool.  MDMA can turn people into obnoxious simps or into the most interesting conversationalist ever.  The latter requires maintaining your composure though.

I’m going to meditate a fuckload before Saturday. That’s for sure.

[Huff]

play it cool man

u cool man?

[Raist]

So... if on Saturday I end up taking MDMA with Possum Girl I'm not entirely sure what my lovely dovey uninhibited self might do.

Thoughts? 

Focus on maintaining your composure;  play it cool.  MDMA can turn people into obnoxious simps or into the most interesting conversationalist ever.  The latter requires maintaining your composure though.

I’m going to meditate a fuckload before Saturday. That’s for sure.

Yeah you need to chill bro lol;  these last few posts of yours.. over a girl you've know, what.. 2 weeks?  Hung out with.. 3-4 times?

CHILL MON

Reminder: http://www.thebore.com/forum/index.php?topic=44700.msg2216376#msg2216376

[CatsCatsCats]

The problem with that advice is if you’re really fucked up telling yourself not to think about it or worry about it can drive you nuts when you forget what you aren’t supposed to think about

Source: getting stuck in a thought loop all night on too many mushies

[hampster]

Oh my god, possum girl is my own personal “tyler durden”. 

She’s so wild & free and I’m closed off & reserved. She’s constantly taking me places and doing things with me that would normally be outside my comfort zone if I was by myself. 

edit: I almost want to tell her about this revelation but I must refrain out of fear that she’ll disappear as soon as I make my alter ego aware that it is my alter ego. 

Give us a heads up before the domestic terrorism starts

[Atramental]

Another thing that has me a bit spooked about taking MDMA is making sure I’m actually taking pure MDMA that hasn’t been cut with some bullshit that could fuck me up. Or it’s just flat out not MDMA. Or I take a pill with a super high dose of MDMA.

If there’s no testing kit/booth or whatever I’ll just play it safe and stay sober.

[CatsCatsCats]

Oh you’ll definitely be taking some meth or someshit in there

[Atramental]

Dammit.

I like filler but I don’t want to end up like him. 

[CatsCatsCats]

They won’t ban you for having it mixed in