Author Topic: Drug Experiences  (Read 40379 times)

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BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #240 on: November 17, 2018, 02:52:26 AM »
Lmao!

This is the 4acodmt synthetic.

I took a stupid fucking dose at 78mg then redosed 25mg four hours in. I fucking lost my marbles. I heard a voice calling my name and I'm fucking tearing up thinking about. It was hateful. I could tell it wanted me to see things I didnt want to see. It took all my fucking willpower to turn away from it.

I feel like I pierced the veil. Absolutely pierced it. And it wanted to eat me.

As far as visual the graphics on my TV melted and they came at me.  I wanted it to stop so badly. The feeling of dread was so overwhelming I wanted to scream for help.
:9

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #241 on: November 17, 2018, 02:59:16 AM »
I kid you not i was muttering to myself in tongues at one point caught in some sort of rapture
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BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #242 on: November 17, 2018, 03:11:54 AM »
What's got me spooked is the sense of deja vu. I've done this before, many many times. But everytime I've gone through it I've pulled a new experience away.

Honestly this feels like a pivotal moment in my life. Some sort of techtonic shift emotionally. I am liberated.
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BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #243 on: November 17, 2018, 03:24:43 AM »
Fuck me.  I browned out for a bit during. And now some of it is coming back. There was one point where, in an effort to drown out the singular voice calling out to me, I tried turning on my fan for some much needed white noise. It didnt turn on. Fuck. I needed to stop hearing this voice NOW. I got up and plugged it in. But in doing so I got this sense like I was in some sort of twilight space. In between reality and whatever else is out there. Felt like reality itself was watching me. Considering me. What is this gnat that stepped into our realm. Lets see what it does.
:9

toku

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #244 on: November 17, 2018, 05:47:58 AM »
when we break from linear time weird things happen

Tasty

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #245 on: November 17, 2018, 09:34:39 AM »
Fuck me.  I browned out for a bit during. And now some of it is coming back. There was one point where, in an effort to drown out the singular voice calling out to me, I tried turning on my fan for some much needed white noise. It didnt turn on. Fuck. I needed to stop hearing this voice NOW. I got up and plugged it in. But in doing so I got this sense like I was in some sort of twilight space. In between reality and whatever else is out there. Felt like reality itself was watching me. Considering me. What is this gnat that stepped into our realm. Lets see what it does.

Simulation theory breh... we're all being watched all the time. For who knows what reasons. :thinking

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #246 on: November 17, 2018, 09:56:16 AM »
when we break from linear time weird things happen

Exactly. And I couldnt comprehend a lick of it. I only had my emotions to guide me since logic went out the window there.

Fuck me.  I browned out for a bit during. And now some of it is coming back. There was one point where, in an effort to drown out the singular voice calling out to me, I tried turning on my fan for some much needed white noise. It didnt turn on. Fuck. I needed to stop hearing this voice NOW. I got up and plugged it in. But in doing so I got this sense like I was in some sort of twilight space. In between reality and whatever else is out there. Felt like reality itself was watching me. Considering me. What is this gnat that stepped into our realm. Lets see what it does.

Simulation theory breh... we're all being watched all the time. For who knows what reasons. :thinking

Yes. And the that thought unsettles me, deeply.

And this twilight place, if I were to reference a show in which the vibe was similar, it would have to be the upside down in Stranger Things. Not as visually dramatic but my room was my room but the light was wrong.

After I got the fan going I had this incredible urge to go outside in just my boxers and wait for... something. I was needed outside. But a fragment of me was still grasping to reality, fortunately.

Another strange thing. I extended my arm out at one point in the darkness. My arm was shadow, twisting, flashing, morphing. It was like the hyperspace scene in 2001:A Space Odyssey. But instead of bright lights flashing by me it was a negative light. Dark matter. My arms shadow had a shadow which had a shadow and so on. Moving back and forth quickly. It was beautiful in some obscene way.
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toku

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #247 on: November 17, 2018, 11:56:49 AM »
the only thing watching yourself is you, always

TVC15

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #248 on: November 17, 2018, 12:12:38 PM »
I was watching this (dat intro)



but I saw it was recommending this so I watched it and



I forgot she’s the queen for a reason
serge

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #249 on: November 17, 2018, 07:22:16 PM »
an interesting article on psilocybn and how ones personality can effect the experience

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/unique-everybody-else/201209/psilocybin-and-personality

What I found curious was how compelled I was to write along with my photography. When I was deep in the trip, before I lost total control I was uninhibited on being open about my emotions. Ive always toyed with this but my ego sort of held me back. In the trip it just flowed out of me and what sounded right I commited to completely. These poems accompanied posts on instagram. Some poems made and attached to a photo, some inspired by one of my photos.. It just kept coming and coming. I sill have that urge now.

On and the Cassidy decal I have on thr back of my phone, I caught a glimpse of him while I was off it. I had to look away. He was moving. I think I would have totally freaked if he started interacting with me.
« Last Edit: November 17, 2018, 07:26:26 PM by BlueTsunami »
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TVC15

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #250 on: November 17, 2018, 08:16:48 PM »
A friend and I are planning on starting a regimen of microdosing mushrooms in January. I’m not expecting much, considering I take mood stabilizers and antipsychotics, but we’ll see. Even weed is super dulled to me. I could smoke CBD all day with no effect, and I really only ever feel 70%+ THC.
serge

shosta

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #251 on: November 17, 2018, 08:20:46 PM »
microdosing shrooms is how you trigger schizophrenia
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TVC15

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #252 on: November 17, 2018, 08:24:02 PM »
Pretty sure I’m out of the danger zone for that.
serge

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #253 on: November 17, 2018, 10:01:36 PM »
A friend and I are planning on starting a regimen of microdosing mushrooms in January. I’m not expecting much, considering I take mood stabilizers and antipsychotics, but we’ll see. Even weed is super dulled to me. I could smoke CBD all day with no effect, and I really only ever feel 70%+ THC.

The only issue with microdosing would be tolerance buildup I believe. You'd have to account for it by doubling and tripling dosage to hit the same level of trip over the course of microdosing. Maybe taling three different distinct tryptamines and microdosing to mitigate this. One each day, then cycling back.

But microdosing is an interesting concept.

As far as schizophrenia, when i heard that voice I'm pretty sure thats what it feels like. It was compelling me to do things not directly tied to the voice itself. Youd have to take a heroic dose to get there for sure.

I'm reading about directing the trip once you become comfortable. Being able to will things into existence. As terrifying as this was my curiosity is going to get the best of me again. But not for a while.
« Last Edit: November 17, 2018, 10:29:12 PM by BlueTsunami »
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BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #254 on: November 23, 2018, 11:21:58 PM »
So i hand stuffed 140 capsules with cactus powder, and choked them all down in the span of an hour. Ive been slowly climbing for the past 8 hours. I keep thinking its just gonna fade but nope. 50g of this fucker is very slowly realeasing in my intestines right now.
« Last Edit: November 23, 2018, 11:30:00 PM by BlueTsunami »
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BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #255 on: November 24, 2018, 05:51:31 PM »

Darkness falls
And I don't know whether to feel
Relieved or
Afraid
All that I know is
I am happy to feel
Something


This darkness calls again
With one hand
Clutching my throat
The other
Caressing my cheek
I look into its eyes
With absolute love
Because I truly do not
Give a fuck


Oh baby
You think you know darkness?
How about you look into my eyes
Watch as my pupils dilate
As my face begins to grin
Oh my love
You don't know shit

« Last Edit: November 24, 2018, 08:15:36 PM by BlueTsunami »
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BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #256 on: November 24, 2018, 08:13:59 PM »

You do not know me
And if my miserable life continues as it does
You never will
:9

Atramental

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #257 on: November 29, 2018, 01:32:10 AM »
Dropping acid for the first time ever at a BDSM show.

Bad idea or baaad idea?  :doge

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #258 on: November 29, 2018, 05:51:06 AM »
Its like trying to thread a needle but maybe see if you can get a dosage thats best for you
:9

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #259 on: November 30, 2018, 07:51:43 PM »

Your Spring lips
to my
Winter heart
Breath life into what is
dead
:9

CatsCatsCats

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #260 on: November 30, 2018, 08:18:01 PM »
Dropping acid for the first time ever at a BDSM show.

Bad idea or baaad idea?  :doge

V bad

stufte

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #261 on: November 30, 2018, 08:24:36 PM »
IMO, you shouldn't drop acid for the first time in an unfamiliar place surrounded by randos.

Broseidon

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #262 on: November 30, 2018, 11:09:48 PM »
hope u had a good time atra :heartbeat
bent

Atramental

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #263 on: December 01, 2018, 02:13:46 AM »
It’s actually on the 7th of December.

I might be going there with a recent friend I made. But before we head there we’re gonna get somewhat blitzed on weed and/or alcohol. :doge

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BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #264 on: December 01, 2018, 07:57:50 AM »
Anyway you can get acid before then? I find that the initial system shock as far as thebnewness of the experience can make the trip sour easily, especially if youre prone to anxiety and this is in a quiet room by myself. If nothing else go into it with an affirmation that its all in your head and a way to stave off the bad thoughts.


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Yeah this is a recipe for disaster my man  :lol
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Atramental

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #265 on: December 01, 2018, 12:02:08 PM »
Well, she doesn’t own the town.

I can go wherever I please!

edit: also, I’ll not be able to get acid before then.

shosta

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #266 on: December 01, 2018, 12:36:20 PM »
"So what if we run into each other at the same BDSM liveshow? I go to BDSM liveshows all the time!"
每天生气

Atramental

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #267 on: December 01, 2018, 12:38:22 PM »
I don’t want to bail on that guy I might be going with though.  :doge

Maybe I’ll just get a gimp mask so no one will know it’s me.  :doge

shosta

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #268 on: December 01, 2018, 12:43:51 PM »
You're going with a dude?! :neogaf

Just a couple of bros, watching some porn!
每天生气

Atramental

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #269 on: December 01, 2018, 12:47:27 PM »
(he’s bi)  :doge

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #270 on: December 01, 2018, 01:21:30 PM »
Id go in a fake moustache and worn New York Yankees cap
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Atramental

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #271 on: December 01, 2018, 01:52:19 PM »
Also, when I was at my favorite bar last night, some dominatrix looking girl gave me a card inviting me to the event.

I mean...

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BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #272 on: December 01, 2018, 02:07:34 PM »
Have you forgotten already? Silence is violence :wag
:9

Atramental

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #273 on: December 01, 2018, 03:32:56 PM »
She’s been liking my posts on tumblr and facebook lately though.  :doge

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #274 on: December 01, 2018, 04:14:09 PM »
Yeah you dipped your dick in crazy. The opposum should have been the sign. Game like that drive me mad.
:9

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #275 on: December 01, 2018, 04:19:32 PM »
Yeah you dipped your dick in crazy. The opposum should have been the sign. Game like that drive me mad.

Editor’s note: didn’t actually dip his dick.

:lol I knew id catch this
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Atramental

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #276 on: December 01, 2018, 04:31:36 PM »
Yeah.

My long, dexterous fingers were the only things I dipped into her.  :doge

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #277 on: December 01, 2018, 04:33:38 PM »
Yeah.

My long, dexterous fingers were the only things I dipped into her.  :doge

I'm sure this has happened to all of us. This happened to me and my ex the first and it fucking suuuuucked. Also resorted to fingerbanging while my withered dick collapsed into itself.
:9

toku

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #278 on: December 01, 2018, 07:48:18 PM »
to be unmoored in that deep black of your other mind

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #279 on: December 01, 2018, 08:02:44 PM »
to be unmoored in that deep black of your other mind

Absolutely

This is before my rebirth, in every sense. I can't believe I was that person. Closed off in every way.
:9

Tasty

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #280 on: December 01, 2018, 11:32:32 PM »
Relationship thread ->

El Babua

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #281 on: December 01, 2018, 11:48:34 PM »
Truee. Atra, either intake some shit or leave this thread.

Atramental

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #282 on: December 02, 2018, 12:39:05 AM »
Last relationship related post in this thread:
I’m going to that BDSM show with my friend Friday.

I don’t care if possum girl likes it or not.

I’m going to be trying to get with other freaky girls that night anyways. Fuck it.

El Babua

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #283 on: December 02, 2018, 01:20:39 AM »
Fuck possum girl bro, either physically or rhetorically.

EightBitNate

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #284 on: December 03, 2018, 12:13:56 AM »
Anyone have experience with ritalin? I know it’s not recreational but I tried using it for focus and I’m feeling kinda meh about it’s side effects. Adderall was much better but maybe it was too strong. Both make me anxious af too.

Transhuman

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #285 on: December 03, 2018, 07:02:58 AM »
If you're looking for a drug for concentration/alertness, modafinil or armodafinil are a much safer alternative. It's bad to use it habitually for no reason though.

EightBitNate

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #286 on: December 03, 2018, 08:46:43 AM »
If you're looking for a drug for concentration/alertness, modafinil or armodafinil are a much safer alternative. It's bad to use it habitually for no reason though.

I’m not using it very often. Like once every few months.

Tasty

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #287 on: December 04, 2018, 05:57:01 PM »
Tried poppers again today. Between a meh and a whoah honestly.

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #288 on: December 06, 2018, 09:19:09 PM »
Gonna take 55mg of that DMT tomorrow. Pray for meh. I'm walking it up to see where the shore drops off for me. The dose that sent me over was 78 + a 28 redose.

And I was reading about higher dose DMT experiences and I got goosebumps when I read about

1) someone recalling dreams out of nowhere

And

2) someone saw a circular rainbow, like lens flair. Thats EXACTLY what I saw before the shit grabbed me by the throat and flung me around.
:9

CatsCatsCats

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #289 on: December 06, 2018, 11:02:12 PM »
There was a circular rainbow around the sun once when I was in elementary school, shit was rad

Think I might brew a low dose mushie tea this weekend for a bit of a chemical reset
« Last Edit: December 06, 2018, 11:07:29 PM by CatsCatsCats »

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #290 on: December 07, 2018, 04:53:27 PM »
23 hour fasted
55mg taken
Have a feeling this shit is gonna blow my butthole out the back of my neck
:9

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #291 on: December 07, 2018, 06:26:58 PM »
This is it everyone the perfect fucking dose
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BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #292 on: December 07, 2018, 07:11:33 PM »
Its so fucking strange, a lot of what I write, the good ones, feel as though I've heard them before. Like they're echoes I'm just amplifiing
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BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #293 on: December 07, 2018, 08:07:15 PM »
I can feel myself evolving lmao I'm losing it
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Cryo

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #294 on: December 07, 2018, 08:25:02 PM »
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« Last Edit: December 07, 2018, 08:35:04 PM by Cryo »

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #295 on: December 07, 2018, 08:34:55 PM »
That sounds terrifying, especially given the environment you were in
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Cryo

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #296 on: December 07, 2018, 08:39:22 PM »
idk, it was really peaceful and enjoyable when I didn’t end up too deep within my own isolationist thoughts. I was laying on a thermarest watching the underbrush and i could hone in on any minuscule movement of grass or branches waving in the leaves, I’ve never heard a creek warbling so beautifully in my life, and I was told a smile never left my face the entire trip.

BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #297 on: December 07, 2018, 10:40:46 PM »


The comedown

 :goty
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BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #298 on: December 08, 2018, 12:17:18 PM »
So i bought 2ft of whole fresh cactus after being burned by the connect I was using before. Think he sent me shit. Now I'm learning to cook it from the source. Pictures to come. Slamming the shit tonight. For you prospeftive weekend trippers there is no cross tolerance between psilocybn and mescaline. So you can rock out with your cock out back to back.
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BlueTsunami

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Re: Drug Experiences
« Reply #299 on: December 08, 2018, 06:20:59 PM »
Yep, this is it. 2 hours in and its becoming noticeable. Oh sweet mescaline, how I've missed you...
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