River Of Slime |OT| Mission: Impossible

[clothedmacuser]

Thread title updated with OP's consent.


https://www.resetera.com/threads/bidens-racist-remarks-about-students-schools-and-more-from-2007-resurface.115920/post-20600005


What does that imply about all the other times they update an OP?

[Cauliflower Of Love]

They love to go in an editorialize thread titles.  I intentionally subjectively capitalize thread titles for emphasize and they go in and fuck things up all the time.

OP, you can’t put quotes around something that is not a quote in a thread title.

lol, fuck off

[zepblackstar]

Fuck, imagine being a twig-thin shrill voiced gamer dweeb with maximum level derp face and having the audacity to cheat on this fine piece of elven ass

(Image removed from quote.)

out of your fucking mind

He went from her to... her?

lawd, forgive my hubris and disappointment BUT WTF?
 

[benjipwns]

Fuck, imagine being a twig-thin shrill voiced gamer dweeb with maximum level derp face and having the audacity to cheat on this fine piece of elven ass

(Image removed from quote.)

out of your fucking mind

she refused to cosplay samus as a wheelchair

[Transhuman]

Ninja no-girl policy vindicated total.

First you play Baldur’s Gate together, then you’re Balduring her Gates.

Nah. Ninja was worried about people starting rumours, he wasn't worried that he'd be unable to resist fucking anyone who threw themself at him

[Lonewulfeus]

I think ProJared looks like a distinguished mentally-challenged version of Pete from Shaun of the Dead

spoiler (click to show/hide)

I bet Pete’s dick is way better though

[close]

[BIONIC]

Ninja no-girl policy vindicated total.

First you play Baldur’s Gate together, then you’re Balduring her Gates.

When’s the last time you did either with your wife?

[Transhuman]

Mistress 9 and Heidi together

Mistress 9 and Mistress 10

[james]

Did we get nudes of the elf?

[Boredfrom]

(Image removed from quote.)
top 5 bruh moments

spoiler (click to show/hide)

#14 was faked :'(

[close]

His (soon ex) wife anime representation looks like Mash from Fate/Go.

[Transhuman]

I mean they might still get back together don't rush to conclusions

[Jenkem]

Two months ago, on March 9, 2019, was the last time Enzom posted on REE.
Almost a week later, on March 15, 2019, the Christchurch Shootings took place.

This could have been avoided had one person on the internet stood up and called him what he really wanted to.

[Cauliflower Of Love]

rioutous wouldnt know what to do with side pussy if it sat on him and grinded away.

[Momo]

Married women 


Unobtainable yet single women 

[BikeJesus]

Divorced cougar's hungry for a hot beef injection 

[Momo]

wait, is this projared secretly bi or was he always bi? all the people with stories about him i'm seeing are dudes

[BisMarckie]

When discussing older movies, people seem to have a "You had X years to see it" sort of attitude, the crux of the argument being that if you had enough time to get your chance to see a movie, then it's on you for not having seen it by now.

While reasonable on the surface, this doesn't actually work in practice. What if you simply haven't heard of an older movie? For example, about 5 years ago, I was browsing movies and decided to put on the Unusual Suspects out of sheer randomness. I was just look for something to watch, and happened on this movie. I think a friend may have recommended it, but gave no details on what it was. Otherwise, I have never heard of it before, never seen any information about it, nothing. As far as I knew, it was a highly obscure movie. I watched it and when I saw the ending, and thought that was pretty good. Some time later, I saw someone randomly post the major spoiler from that movie in a thread, and when someone called him out on it, he simply made the above argument: It was a several decade old movie, so spoiling it was free game.

The thing is, if I hadn't seen the Usual Suspects by then, which only happened on pure whim from boredom, I'd have had a good element on a movie I didn't even know existed (but would have enjoyed) spoiled for me. And that kind of conflicts with the assertion "you had X years to see it" argument, because I really didn't. I didn't even know it existed until long after it was made and I could have easily not seen it for more years to come. I'd also like to point out that how old you are depends on this as well. If your 13 years old, there are a multitude of reasons you wouldn't have heard of all sorts of older films until you went exploring.

Lets take another example, the most famous one ever: Darth Vader is Luke's father. (and before you pedantic shits with delusions of wit even try to turn the tables and say "Well, you just had a spoiler in your thread, didn't you", no, because this is so ubiquitously branded into society that it doesn't count as a spoiler, even if it should, which is actually what the next paragraph is about....)

I was spoiled to this twist before I knew what star wars was. People make a big deal out of star wars being the most culturally important blockbuster phenomenon of all time and I guess I certainly make enough SW threads to validate that to some degree, but to be honest, I don't like the original trilogy that much, for various reasons. But a big part of them is that when I finally watched them for the first time, my mind was constantly thinking "I've seen this done better elsewhere". And in regards to the twist itself, any impact of it was robbed because I was spoiled to Darth Vader being Luke's father through parodies, references, tributes, and otherwise allusions to the material from as early as when I was 8 years old.

I was spoiled to "I am your father" before I knew what Star Wars even was. So how can it be said that I had a fair chance to see it for myself?

And how did that affect how I enjoyed the movies? It's impossible to say, but it makes me sad to think I'd have liked the movies more if I didn't have that information thrust into my face so early. I am not a major spoilerphobe, but I nevertheless remembered that when I watched it, I wasn't in the moment with Luke and his shock and horror at the revelation. My first thought was "Oh, so this is where all the references come from", and I just think that's a bit of a shame.

Now listen, you are all lovely, intelligent people who can readily comprehend nuanced and detailed arguments....it's just that a good portion of you also have the attention span of goldfish hopped up on some amphetamines. So I'm anticipating a lot of replies that didn't get past the title or else the first few paragraphs and just assumed my argument to be that we should not talk about spoilers ever regardless of time or something to that effect. But I actually don't think that's reasonable.

Mostly because I think some spoilers....evolve, for a lack of better word. It's become this thing that everyone who is a member of the geek community has seen, to the point where we make references to it in other works, which means it's commonality spreads further. Darth Vader being Luke's father isn't merely the twist of Empire Strikes Back, or even merely a story beat, it's a cultural touchstone. There was a thread either here or back at the old place, where some poster came in and said that they had not only never seen Star Wars but also never knew that "I am your father" referred to Luke and Darth Vader, so when he finally did see it, he was hit with the twist as close to as someone who saw it in 1980 could do. But more interestingly, the reactions of every poster was something to behold. Everyone was so baffled and confused how this person could have gone 20 years without ever seeing Star Wars or even making the connection of what "I am your father" was. Everyone honestly treated him like some kind of alien, just because it was THAT incomprehensible that a person would go through that much of their life without knowing about Luke's dad.

Currently, we have the fastest induced version of this with Thanos' snap. I don't feel the need to hide it for the same reasons I don't feel the need to hide Luke's Father, evne though the snap is still relatively new. It's not just because everyone and their mother saw Infinity War twice either. The Snap, like the SW twist, wasn't just a plot point, it was a was a big cultural moment for all of us where we saw our blockbuster heroes, who have never truly lost in a movie before, lose catastrophically. It was a moment that deeply affected us, so what did we do? Well, what we always do as a society with our art: we meme

And through those memes, the snap spread through the internet like wildfire, and eventually, everyone knew about it whether they had an interest in Avengers or not. You can't realistically contain that. And by consequence, plenty of people, especially kids who are just starting to watch these, are now gonna be in my star wars situation, where it is Superhero movies might be something they enjoy, but they will be told about the snap before they even have a chance. And, again, the snap is only one year old.


So, I'm not saying spoilers are offlimits because...well, they can't be. We make a good portion of our culture off some spoilers. However, whats the solution to this then? Are you supposed to just watch all of cinema...like, every movie ever made, as soon as you decide you like movies in general? Because even if you limit it to just the major ones, that's still hundreds of hours of watching movies (and TV shows and games and so on) just so some person doesn't innocently spoil it without knowing because they assume, since it's been so many years, everyone'd have seen it. That's not really practical. I think all we can do is hope people are courteous about it atleast. Just keep in mind that no matter how old a movie is, someone hasn't seen it before, and they might like to, and there is no reason you have to include it in the title of your threads where people would be forced to see it.



Anyway, snape kills dumbledore.

Thoughts?

[Transhuman]

(Keyser Söze was a mug)

[Transhuman]

(No he doesn't)

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tetsuo:_The_Iron_Man

[VomKriege]

Learn to appreciate fictional works as a whole instead on focusing on their finishing note.

[Transhuman]

Nah a little surprise can make a big difference.

That poster is a crybaby tho

[GreatSageEqualOfHeaven]

1) That posters a hypocritical asshole, because if he doesn't believe there's a statute of limitations on spoilers, he just dropped a bunch of extremely specific and recognisable ones for literally no reason.

2) Spoilers mean nothing out of context; if you have no interest in watching cape films "THANOS SNAP!" means literally fuck all to you, and never will.
"Bruce willis is a ghost!" with no other context means nothing. Nor does "I am your father!". Nor does "It was earth all along!".
Conversely, "'Luke, I am your father' is what Darth Vader is misquoted as saying to Luke Skywalker at the end of Empire Strikes Back where it is revealed that the series antagonist is related to the protagonist" is a highly specific reference that is unambiguously a spoiler to anyone who hasn't seen that film, and they know specifically what film it is referring to.

3) "I'm a huge cinephile, what's the Usual Suspects? That some kinda obscure arthouse flick?"

4) I told someone who was about to watch Shawshank Redemption once its a pretty good film, but a bit melodramatic when Tim Robbins kills himself, and they thought I was a huge asshole right up until the point I'd actually kind of made the film better for saying that.
Conversely, when I was about to watch Shawshank Redemption with someone who'd never seen it, the literal fucking DVD menu screen is a loop of the scene with Tim Robbins covered in mud and shit standing in the rain next to a freshly dug hole doing a "FREEEEEEEEEEDOM!" pose, which.... breh, thats your fucking 'press play' screen?

[joeboy101]

(Keyser Söze was a mug)

The only mug here is you.

The coffee mug was Kobayashi.

[GreatSageEqualOfHeaven]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/anne-hathaways-new-movie-the-hustle-remake-of-dirty-rotten-scoundrels-has-a-rocking-13-on-rt.116121/post-20631115

Excelsheetthief weirdly not stepping up to the plate to bat for it being manbaby incels all butthurt about their unfunny empowering all female remake of popular prior material review bombing a film through their salty man tears.

Y'all at MGM need to get on Sonys level with the astroturfing and deflection of criticism if you want to shovel shit in insertcurrentyear

[VomKriege]

Nah a little surprise can make a big difference.

I don't think I said different ? But the extent to which some people want to police spoilers is textbook missing the forest for the trees and at its most extreme stifles any kind of critical conversation beyond a reptilian "It is good" / "It is bad".

[Raist]

Anne Hathaway tho 

[Snoopycat_]

I walked into Remoulade on Bourbon Street tonight and thought of you fellas. A table full of gorgeous Anne Hathaways, every shade from cafe au lait to deep mocha. All drunk, wearing scraps. I could feel your thirst all the way from here. Then I ate jambalaya and gumbo.

[Transhuman]

Nah a little surprise can make a big difference.

I don't think I said different ? But the extent to which some people want to police spoilers is textbook missing the forest for the trees and at its most extreme stifles any kind of critical conversation beyond a reptilian "It is good" / "It is bad".

The only thing worse than spoilers is seeing like 100+ fucking ads/mentions/videos/stories on Facebook/youtube about how you shouldn't spoild Endgame, and all the late-night talk shows/press junkets where the interviewer will say with fake mirth "hey can you tell us how it ends" and then Chris Evans/Scarlett Johansson/Robert Downey Jr./Brie Larson will smile and say "I wish I could tell you, but even I don't know how it ends. I'm only a vapid actor after all. Sometimes they tell me to stare at this stick with a dot on it, and I have to pretend like i'm talking to a big green man, but there's no-one actually there".

They clearly just throw the word spoiler around for these movies because some marketing exec figured out it's good for hype and is a good topic of smalltalk that even dumb people can understand.

[Transhuman]

Can I interest any of you in a group suicide?

[BIONIC]

Definitely. You go first tho 

[Transhuman]

Just a reminder that if you're going to buy scalpel blades for wristslit suicide, buy the #10 blade because it is curved for easier opening incision.

[Switters]

I walked into Remoulade on Bourbon Street tonight and thought of you fellas. A table full of gorgeous Anne Hathaways, every shade from cafe au lait to deep mocha. All drunk, wearing scraps. I could feel your thirst all the way from here. Then I ate jambalaya and gumbo.

Mother fucker, you can't just change two words and throw this around willy-nilly.

When i see "I walked into remoulade..." I want my asshole turned inside out with topical snark and anarchy.

This is a low-effort Weezer covering Africa level of effort that I will not stand for. Good day.

[bork]

Fuck, imagine being a twig-thin shrill voiced gamer dweeb with maximum level derp face and having the audacity to cheat on this fine piece of elven ass

(Image removed from quote.)

out of your fucking mind

New pussy > old pussy

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Chris Rock ended up cheating on his wife later on.  Man, that show when he started talking about this got really depressing. 

[close]

[GreatSageEqualOfHeaven]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/its-time-we-stopped-openly-spoiling-final-fantasy-vii-unmarked-spoilers.116138/post-20634013

Nah.
And her death is shitty compared to Galuf (Da God) in FFV. Who also dies.

e:
also fuck all you weebs in that topic calling her Aerith

Pretentious? Watashi?

[bork]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/beard-transplant.116095/

Beard Era... I just can't grow a beard. I lost the beard genetic lottery since the day I was born. Not a single hair on my cheeks... none, nada, zero.

I remember since I was in high school, I wanted a beard. I was jealous of my friends with a beard... Then the years passed and I never could grow one. I learned to live beardless. But the beard fad started a few years ago, and now I'm reminded again that I can't grow one.

I'm 35 years old. I won't grow a beard naturally... My body just can't do it. Never.

If I don't shave for a couple of weeks, this is all I can grow:

(Image removed from quote.)

Only some ugly hairs on my moustache and chin area. Absolutely not a single hair on my cheeks.

But look how awesome I would look with a bread (FaceApp):

(Image removed from quote.)

I tried Minoxidil, but got no luck. So I'm considering a beard transplant. They basically take hair follicle from the back of your heard and insert then into your face. It would cost close to $4000 USD.

I'm seriously considering it.

Has anyone of you ever heard of this procedure?

[HaughtyFrank]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/its-time-we-stopped-openly-spoiling-final-fantasy-vii-unmarked-spoilers.116138/post-20634013

Nah.
And her death is shitty compared to Galuf (Da God) in FFV. Who also dies.

e:
also fuck all you weebs in that topic calling her Aerith

I wonder how long it will take before there are articles about how super problematic everyone's most iconic memory from FF7 is.

[GreatSageEqualOfHeaven]

That's kind of the point, the game is so old that a lot of people have never had the chance to play it. Someone who was a 5 year old kid when the game released would be 27 today!

Gosh, if only it were available on modern systems like Windows, IOS, Android, Playstation 4, Nintendo Switch or Xbox One at a substantially cheaper pricetag than the remake will sell for and people would have the opportunity to play it through to completion.

[GreatSageEqualOfHeaven]

Also I'm just gonna come out and say it - its better to know that Aeris dies in advance, so you don't bother wasting any exp grind on her useless ass.

Just another example where FFV hit the exact same plotpoint and did it better.

[Momo]

FFV is the best final fantasy of them all though

[Jansen]

Too bad he didn't wait for those girls to age wel...

https://www.reddit.com/r/ProJared/comments/a83yv9/anybody_catch_projareds_dick_pic_on_tumblr/emz3te5?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

[Jansen]

LMAO that projared dick pic is the Facebook angle of dick pics

[BisMarckie]

[demi]

https://old.reddit.com/r/ProJared/comments/bmuhiv/reminder_reviewbrah_has_never_committed_adultery/

FACTS (also I bet he's hung like an innocent pure horse)

[Cauliflower Of Love]

Cable is Thanos.

[Tripon]

Thanos is purple because he is one big penis.

[Cauliflower Of Love]

I'm surprised there isn't a thread about the abortion bill in georgia on era.

[Joe Molotov]

Fuck, imagine being a twig-thin shrill voiced gamer dweeb with maximum level derp face and having the audacity to cheat on this fine piece of elven ass

(Image removed from quote.)

out of your fucking mind

she refused to cosplay samus as a wheelchair

Métis amputee Samus

[BisMarckie]

Don‘t cool young dude shame.

[Cauliflower Of Love]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/cathartic-objects-these-robotic-objects-are-designed-to-be-stabbed-and-beaten-to-help-you-feel-better.116180/


*Research Project on Catharsis*

reee: uh I don't think research shows what they hypothesizing.

[nachobro]

https://twitter.com/AtelierHeidi/status/1069788600789741569

his ex seems like an ok broad

[BisMarckie]

Imagine how many “Imma treat you right“ DMs she is getting from even dorkier dweebs than her ex.

[Raist]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/anne-hathaways-new-movie-the-hustle-remake-of-dirty-rotten-scoundrels-has-a-rocking-13-on-rt.116121/post-20631115

Excelsheetthief weirdly not stepping up to the plate to bat for it being manbaby incels all butthurt about their unfunny empowering all female remake of popular prior material review bombing a film through their salty man tears.

Y'all at MGM need to get on Sonys level with the astroturfing and deflection of criticism if you want to shovel shit in insertcurrentyear

Holy fuck

Anne Hathaway detonates a megaton blast of pure unfunniness in this terrifying film. She leaves behind a mushroom cloud of anti-humour, reducing every laugh possibility to grey-white ash in a postapocalyptic landscape of horror and despair. If J Robert Oppenheimer had witnessed this, he might have staggered out of the cinema auditorium, subjected the foyer to his stricken thousand-yard stare, and murmured that Hathaway had become Death of Comedy, the destroyer of gags.

https://www.theguardian.com/film/2019/may/09/the-hustle-review-anne-hathaway-rebel-wilson

[BisMarckie]

The “I crack jokes on a forum with 30 members“-virgin vs. the 1 million subscribers -chad.

[bork]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/beard-transplant.116095/

Beard Era... I just can't grow a beard. I lost the beard genetic lottery since the day I was born. Not a single hair on my cheeks... none, nada, zero.

I remember since I was in high school, I wanted a beard. I was jealous of my friends with a beard... Then the years passed and I never could grow one. I learned to live beardless. But the beard fad started a few years ago, and now I'm reminded again that I can't grow one.

I'm 35 years old. I won't grow a beard naturally... My body just can't do it. Never.

If I don't shave for a couple of weeks, this is all I can grow:

(Image removed from quote.)

Only some ugly hairs on my moustache and chin area. Absolutely not a single hair on my cheeks.

But look how awesome I would look with a bread (FaceApp):

(Image removed from quote.)

I tried Minoxidil, but got no luck. So I'm considering a beard transplant. They basically take hair follicle from the back of your heard and insert then into your face. It would cost close to $4000 USD.

I'm seriously considering it.

Has anyone of you ever heard of this procedure?

Promoting toxic masculinity.

Hypothesis: FernandoRocker cannot grow facial hair due to his lack of hygiene- his refusal to shower and wipe his muddy ass has resulted in a new form of bacteria, released from floating fecal particles, that destroy all facial hair when they come in contact with the filth on his skin.

[GreatSageEqualOfHeaven]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/ben-shapiro-crumbles-on-bbc-resorts-to-%E2%80%9Ci%E2%80%99m-more-popular-than-you%E2%80%9D.116211/post-20647348

But according to Youtube he destroys everyone

According to Youtube, huh?

[BisMarckie]

No spelling errors, though.

[BisMarckie]

We all are, this is a hate site after all.

[GreatSageEqualOfHeaven]

Self owned with facts and logic

None of these guys actually know how to have a debate and sustain an argument; they only know how to gish gallop college students and it shows every single time an interlocutor with the tiniest bit of preparation for that comes into contact with them.

None of these guys actually know how to have a debate and sustain an argument; they only know how to gish gallop college students and it shows every single time an interlocutor with the tiniest bit of preparation for that comes into contact with them.

Pretty much this.

Ben Shapiro is a person who would lose an argument against himself.

Why are people giving him attention?

And he wonders why no one wants to debate/talk to him. It's cause he's a fucking moron.

Ben Shapiro made his name talking over unconfident students and the like who likely have never spoke publically before. He's never really had to argue his point before. Against a real journalist on air who puts him on the spot he crumples like the fool he always was.

So we just gaslighting the way era approaches this in every other topic, now?
Even this topic has some dumb shit posting that fucking "alt right playbook" video because he didn't get the memo its good when you debate and obviously win, you only pick up your toys and go MUH FREEZE PEACH, MODS HALP when you lose

This is why you shouldn't bother debating these people. Despite selling himself as some facts not feels logic lord, he's a fucking moron.

This is why you shouldn't bother debating these people. Despite selling himself as some facts not feels logic lord, he's a fucking moron.

^^^

This is why you shouldn't bother debating these people. Despite selling himself as some facts not feels logic lord, he's a fucking moron.

It is playing with fire to give these people a platform, in this instance though I think it was more beneficial than not.

:

[agrajag]

The “I crack jokes on a forum with 30 members“-virgin vs. the 1 million subscribers -chad.

Seriously though the girl ain't even cute.

 

Also I have THOUSANDS of followers on Instagram bub. 

(1.6 thousand, it's plural, I swear!)

 

[BisMarckie]

I saw riotous at a grocery store in Seattle yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.

He said, “Oh, its all good dude!”

My heart was warmed, and all I could say was “Thanks!” and he kept patting me on the back and going “no problem bud!” and he chuckled heartily. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him accidentally walking out the doors with fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.

The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” He immediately realized his mistake and went back to pay for the Milky Ways. When she took out multiple bars and started scanning them individually, he stopped her and told her “you can scan the same Milky Way to make things go faster!” Then he turned around and smiled at everyone. He was really chill about it! After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag he went outside to give out Milky Ways to everyone around him.