Do you want kids?

[Mr. Gundam]

I want one kid, my wife wants two. She'll probably win that argument.

But, not for another 4 or 5 years.

[Madrun Badrun]

I want one kid, my wife wants two. She'll probably win that argument.

But, not for another 4 or 5 years.

being a single child - have two. 

[Beezy]

Id rather be dead. Actually being dead would be so sweet. No more work, no more thinking and doing stuff...

Where the hell have you been?

[Mr. Gundam]

I want one kid, my wife wants two. She'll probably win that argument.

But, not for another 4 or 5 years.

being a single child - have two. 

I was an only child, too.*




*I've got a half-sister from my Dad's first marriage. We never lived together, though.

[Van Cruncheon]

i have one, and she is a worthy heir. there shall be no others.

[demi]

I think I'd prefer a boy. Girls are so fragile and woah.

[xnikki118x]

IMO the only reason to adopt would be because you were unable to conceive, would have trouble carrying out the pregnancy or birthing or had a genetic predisposition to certain diseases.
Not because you can't be bothered coping with pain.

Or because there are kids who need to be adopted.
...

Exactly.

I was at a McDonals the other day and saw three annoying girls. Right away I knew the mother weighed 200 pounds and the father had a mullet. NAILED IT. Do you want to raise the children of a man who has a mullet?

Hahahahaha.


I want kids. I always wanted one, a girl, but James needs to have a boy so we have to compromise on at least two, because I want my little girl. I don't want to go more than two unless one is a set of twins--and at that point, if it's a fraternal set of a boy and a girl, I'd be finished.

[Phoenix Dark]

i have one, and she is a worthy heir. there shall be no others.

You don't want a BOY?

I don't want any girls. My mom didn't have any, and my wife doesn't deserve any either.

[cloudwalking]

i don't want kids ever. i'll pass on the months of being huge, stretch marks, crankiness/morning sickness and the experience of pushing a screaming human being out of my cunt for the sole reward of having to support them for 18 years, probably more. i'll use the money i saved to buy myself a porsche or something. i'll make sure to wave at you parents when i drive by you on the highway.

[Ichirou]

i don't want kids ever. i'll pass on the months of being huge, stretch marks, crankiness/morning sickness and the experience of pushing a screaming human being out of my cunt for the sole reward of having to support them for 18 years, probably more. i'll use the money i saved to buy myself a porsche or something. i'll make sure to wave at you parents when i drive by you on the highway.

What about adoption, cloud?  I wouldn't mind adopting a kid.

[The Sceneman]

I dont want children but I really want to have unprotected sex with an extra hot babe

[Phoenix Dark]

i don't want kids ever. i'll pass on the months of being huge, stretch marks, crankiness/morning sickness and the experience of pushing a screaming human being out of my cunt for the sole reward of having to support them for 18 years, probably more. i'll use the money i saved to buy myself a porsche or something. i'll make sure to wave at you parents when i drive by you on the highway.

What if Jarosh wants a kid?

[Fresh Prince]

i don't want kids ever. i'll pass on the months of being huge, stretch marks, crankiness/morning sickness and the experience of pushing a screaming human being out of my cunt for the sole reward of having to support them for 18 years, probably more. i'll use the money i saved to buy myself a porsche or something. i'll make sure to wave at you parents when i drive by you on the highway.

See I can respect this. I don't understand how a woman wanting to avoid the 9 months of 'insert rant' will then adopt a child to put up with 18 years of bullshit, heartache etc - makes no sense to me.

[Phoenix Dark]

i don't want kids ever. i'll pass on the months of being huge, stretch marks, crankiness/morning sickness and the experience of pushing a screaming human being out of my cunt for the sole reward of having to support them for 18 years, probably more. i'll use the money i saved to buy myself a porsche or something. i'll make sure to wave at you parents when i drive by you on the highway.

See I can respect this. I don't understand how a woman wanting to avoid the 9 months of 'insert rant' will then adopt a child to put up with 18 years of bullshit, heartache etc - makes no sense to me.

Some women aren't as selfish as you, and are mature and loving enough to want to do it?

[cloudwalking]

i don't want kids period. i hate them. i may be selfish but at least i'm smart enough to realize i'd make a shitty mother. plus, you know, lesiure time.

[Fresh Prince]

Some women aren't as selfish as you, and are mature and loving enough to want to do it?

I would say such women are immature or illogical because they don't want to deal with 9 months of 'rant' but then adopt and think the 18 years (and more) will be a lot easier the pregnancy.   

[Candyflip]

Some women aren't as selfish as you, and are mature and loving enough to want to do it?

I would say such women are immature or illogical because they don't want to deal with 9 months of 'rant' but then adopt and think the 18 years (and more) will be a lot easier the pregnancy.   

Do you have a problem understanding that some people actually enjoy those 18 years? With your logic the human race would have ended a long time ago. Some people do in fact enjoy raising kids and supporting a family. Some don't. Christ...

[Fresh Prince]

Do you have a problem understanding that some people actually enjoy those 18 years? With your logic the human race would have ended a long time ago. Some people do in fact enjoy raising kids and supporting a family. Some don't. Christ...

No the point was brought by the pain of childbirth so I brought up the point of pain through raising a child. Don't try to attempt to constrew the line of thought.

If I were to take your line of thought alot of people here view pregnancy and childbirth as simply a biological function, while others see it as something more emotional and spiritual connection with their child that can never be broken.

[Candyflip]

Do you have a problem understanding that some people actually enjoy those 18 years? With your logic the human race would have ended a long time ago. Some people do in fact enjoy raising kids and supporting a family. Some don't. Christ...

No the point was brought by the pain of childbirth so I brought up the point of pain through raising a child. Don't try to attempt to constrew the line of thought.

If I were to take your line of thought alot of people here view pregnancy and childbirth as simply a biological function, while others see it as something more emotional and spiritual connection with their child that can never be broken.

Some people don't view it as a "pain" to raise a kid. I don't know why you're trying to establish that there is a legitimate reason for not wanting to have a child. If someone doesn't want to, cool. That's their choice. It's silly to judge a decision like that.

[Fresh Prince]

Do you have a problem understanding that some people actually enjoy those 18 years? With your logic the human race would have ended a long time ago. Some people do in fact enjoy raising kids and supporting a family. Some don't. Christ...

No the point was brought by the pain of childbirth so I brought up the point of pain through raising a child. Don't try to attempt to constrew the line of thought.

If I were to take your line of thought alot of people here view pregnancy and childbirth as simply a biological function, while others see it as something more emotional and spiritual connection with their child that can never be broken.

Some people don't view it as a "pain" to raise a kid. I don't know why you're trying to establish that there is a legitimate reason for not wanting to have a child. If someone doesn't want to, cool. That's their choice. It's silly to judge a decision like that.

I think this point has been confused since I have always been talking about MAF's point, while others (PD) have set to confuse or broaden the issue.

In MAF's scenario a woman decides to adopt a child to simply forego pregnancy and birth citing that it is too difficult. All I am saying that everything being equal 18 years + of raising a child is probably more difficult than 9 months of pregnancy and birth.  Such that I consider these women are stupid and possibly feeding into some celebrity worship shop and adopt scheme.

[Candyflip]

Do you have a problem understanding that some people actually enjoy those 18 years? With your logic the human race would have ended a long time ago. Some people do in fact enjoy raising kids and supporting a family. Some don't. Christ...

No the point was brought by the pain of childbirth so I brought up the point of pain through raising a child. Don't try to attempt to constrew the line of thought.

If I were to take your line of thought alot of people here view pregnancy and childbirth as simply a biological function, while others see it as something more emotional and spiritual connection with their child that can never be broken.

Some people don't view it as a "pain" to raise a kid. I don't know why you're trying to establish that there is a legitimate reason for not wanting to have a child. If someone doesn't want to, cool. That's their choice. It's silly to judge a decision like that.

I think this point has been confused since I have always been talking about MAF's point, while others (PD) have set to confuse or broaden the issue.

In MAF's scenario a woman decides to adopt a child to simply forego pregnancy and birth citing that it is too difficult. All I am saying that everything being equal 18 years + of raising a child is probably more difficult than 9 months of pregnancy and birth.  Such that I consider these women are stupid and possibly feeding into some celebrity worship shop and adopt scheme.

You can't compare stress and a different lifestyle to physical pain, which is what a lot of women are afraid of in birth. People like to feel needed, which is why the weight of the load those 18 years is greatly reduced. I don't think the two are comparable.

[Cheebs]

I want one kid, my wife wants two. She'll probably win that argument.

But, not for another 4 or 5 years.

being a single child - have two. 

Yes. I am a only child and wish I didn't grow up a only child. It gets very lonely. 

[etiolate]

Yes

[Mr. Gundam]

I want one kid, my wife wants two. She'll probably win that argument.

But, not for another 4 or 5 years.

being a single child - have two. 

Yes. I am a only child and wish I didn't grow up a only child. It gets very lonely. 

But that's the thing, I was also an only child. I was never lonely.

My reasoning for only wanting one kid is to provide him/her with the best life possible, emotionally and financially.

[Fragamemnon]

No, never want to have them. Had a vasectomy years ago to ensure that I wouldn't ever be saddled with them.

For me and my fiance (and wife in a couple of weeks, yay!), it was more of a lifestyle choice than anything else. For her, it was two things-one, she's getting up there in years (she turns 39 on Saturday), and two, she doesn't like the notion of being saddled for the next two decades with the responsibility of raising a child, which GREATLY reduces your capability to do whatever the hell you want. This includes the following favorites:

A) sex on demand
B) sleeping in until 1:00 PM on a weekend if you feel like it.
C) Going on an impromptu vacation if there is a super-rare bird spotting or raptor irruption somewhere.
D) Moving somewhere else whenever you feel like it.
E) Peaceful, quiet evenings reading or playing games.

Some of these things you can still do if you have a kid, it's just tons tons harder. I prefer easy mode.

For me, it was all that plus the financial and freetime aspects. I've seen what parenting has done to some of the people I work with, and it's pretty scary to me. They are always running around doing stuff and  have virtually no identity that's not invested in their children. Yes, they take it to the extremes but I does really scare me off from children. Also, I want to retire early ( due to the age difference between my fiance and I) from rat-race activities and, thanks to dual professional income and no children, that's looking very possible.

[demi]

i don't want kids period. i hate them. i may be selfish but at least i'm smart enough to realize i'd make a shitty mother. plus, you know, lesiure time.

I think it's best we not see each other.

[CajoleJuice]

i don't want kids period. i hate them. i may be selfish but at least i'm smart enough to realize i'd make a shitty mother. plus, you know, lesiure time.

What demi said.  :'(

[Robo]

They are a chore-- it's an issue of priorities.

[Phoenix Dark]

I have a feeling most people in this thread will have changed their opinion 100% in say, 5 years

[demi]

I'd want to get one when I was comfortable with where I was in life - career, living, and all that. Early-Mid 30s, maybe? It's not likely given my rate with women, but a man can dream.

[Phoenix Dark]

I'd want to get one when I was comfortable with where I was in life - career, living, and all that. Early-Mid 30s, maybe? It's not likely given my rate with women, but a man can dream.

Exactly. I wouldn't even consider marriage or children until I was set professionally and financially. My dad married and had me while in med school (dental). It worked out in the end, but it was hella stressful for them at the time...not having much money and living in the school housing system.

[CajoleJuice]

I'd want to get one when I was comfortable with where I was in life - career, living, and all that. Early-Mid 30s, maybe? It's not likely given my rate with women, but a man can dream.

Why do I keep finding myself agreeing completely with demi?

[cloudwalking]

No, never want to have them. Had a vasectomy years ago to ensure that I wouldn't ever be saddled with them.

For me and my fiance (and wife in a couple of weeks, yay!), it was more of a lifestyle choice than anything else. For her, it was two things-one, she's getting up there in years (she turns 39 on Saturday), and two, she doesn't like the notion of being saddled for the next two decades with the responsibility of raising a child, which GREATLY reduces your capability to do whatever the hell you want. This includes the following favorites:

A) sex on demand
B) sleeping in until 1:00 PM on a weekend if you feel like it.
C) Going on an impromptu vacation if there is a super-rare bird spotting or raptor irruption somewhere.
D) Moving somewhere else whenever you feel like it.
E) Peaceful, quiet evenings reading or playing games.

Some of these things you can still do if you have a kid, it's just tons tons harder. I prefer easy mode.

For me, it was all that plus the financial and freetime aspects. I've seen what parenting has done to some of the people I work with, and it's pretty scary to me. They are always running around doing stuff and  have virtually no identity that's not invested in their children. Yes, they take it to the extremes but I does really scare me off from children. Also, I want to retire early ( due to the age difference between my fiance and I) from rat-race activities and, thanks to dual professional income and no children, that's looking very possible.

good post. pretty much exactly how i feel.

there was a point in time where my doctor thought i might be infertile due to some problems i was having with my reproductive system. i was psyched about that for a while, but it turned out to be untrue. :'(

my parents were all worried that i wouldn't be able to ever find a husband if i was unable to have children, but i thought they were being stupid. i wish they knew there were more people like you. besides, if you find yourself unable to love someone just because they can't give birth, then you're an asshole. and in my case, won't means can't. i couldn't bring myself to do it. the mere thought repulses me.

[Cheebs]

I have a feeling most people in this thread will have changed their opinion 100% in say, 5 years

By the time everyone in this topic is 40 I expect 90% of them to have had a kid, regardless what they say now.

[demi]

No, never want to have them. Had a vasectomy years ago to ensure that I wouldn't ever be saddled with them.

For me and my fiance (and wife in a couple of weeks, yay!), it was more of a lifestyle choice than anything else. For her, it was two things-one, she's getting up there in years (she turns 39 on Saturday), and two, she doesn't like the notion of being saddled for the next two decades with the responsibility of raising a child, which GREATLY reduces your capability to do whatever the hell you want. This includes the following favorites:

A) sex on demand
B) sleeping in until 1:00 PM on a weekend if you feel like it.
C) Going on an impromptu vacation if there is a super-rare bird spotting or raptor irruption somewhere.
D) Moving somewhere else whenever you feel like it.
E) Peaceful, quiet evenings reading or playing games.

Some of these things you can still do if you have a kid, it's just tons tons harder. I prefer easy mode.

For me, it was all that plus the financial and freetime aspects. I've seen what parenting has done to some of the people I work with, and it's pretty scary to me. They are always running around doing stuff and  have virtually no identity that's not invested in their children. Yes, they take it to the extremes but I does really scare me off from children. Also, I want to retire early ( due to the age difference between my fiance and I) from rat-race activities and, thanks to dual professional income and no children, that's looking very possible.

good post. pretty much exactly how i feel.

there was a point in time where my doctor thought i might be infertile due to some problems i was having with my reproductive system. i was psyched about that for a while, but it turned out to be untrue. :'(

my parents were all worried that i wouldn't be able to ever find a husband if i was unable to have children, but i thought they were being stupid. i wish they knew there were more people like you. besides, if you find yourself unable to love someone just because they can't give birth, then you're an asshole. and in my case, won't means can't. i couldn't bring myself to do it. the mere thought repulses me.

I simply want offspring to teach what I know, and pass it on, I want to experience what my mother and father did so I know where they came from and why they beat the shit out of me. Someone has to carry on the torch of demi, while running the only Nick Frost fansite on the internet.

I think you're just looking at it from a narrow - maybe selfish - point of view. You don't want kids so you have more time for yourself?

[Phoenix Dark]

I have a feeling most people in this thread will have changed their opinion 100% in say, 5 years

By the time everyone in this topic is 40 I expect 90% of them to have had a kid, regardless what they say now.

Exactly.

[cloudwalking]

the "selfish" argument is one that has been debunked time and time again. selfish is a totally subjective thing, and it can seem just as selfish to have children than to decide not to have them, if not MORE so.

NINE COMMON REASONS GIVEN FOR HAVING CHILDREN:

   1. Personal experience - to have the experience of being a parent
   2. Personal pleasure - the fun and joy of raising children
   3. Personal extension - carrying on the genetic heritage or family name
   4. Relationship - the close bond which is shared with children
   5. Personal status - culture affords some respect just for being a parent
   6. Personal competence - gratification from facing the challenge of parenting
   7. Personal responsibility - the opportunity to look out for the welfare and education of another
   8. Personal power - some find the power they have over children gratifying
   9. Moral worth - some feel it is a good and selfless act to put the life of another first, or that it is a moral obligation to have children

      THIRTEEN COMMON REASONS GIVEN FOR NOT HAVING CHILDREN:

   1. Time together - more time each other and for other interests
   2. Freedom - more opportunity to pursue other areas of life
   3. Other children - can enjoy other children, and can help children who are already here through foster parenting or charity work with children
   4. Dual careers - both people may pursue careers full time, a person (woman) does not have to quit, and a child is not raised by day care
   5. Financial security - more money to pursue other interests
   6. Community welfare - greater opportunity to get involved in community organizations
   7. Difficulty - parenthood is a demanding and difficult job which is not always enjoyable
   8. Strain on environmental resources - the world is already overpopulated and is unable to support the people who are already here
   9. Increase in overpopulation - having children geometrically increases this problem and all of the problems that come with it
  10. Choice not mandate - parenthood has to be a choice, not everyone is meant to be a parent
  11. Irrevocable decision - once the decision is made it cannot be changed, so people must be sure it is what they want
  12. Failure - some people had unhappy or abusive childhoods and fear that they would not be a good parent
  13. Danger - the world is a dangerous place and it is not right to bring a child into it

so which sounds more selfish to you? it's pretty much completely a matter of opinion. there are a lot of good reasons for not wanting to have children besides just wanting time to yourself. some people believe their best or only way of making a contribution to society is to have kids. some people don't.

those are answers from an actual survey, btw

[Fragamemnon]

I think you're just looking at it from a narrow - maybe selfish - point of view. You don't want kids so you have more time for yourself?

That's a big part of it for me, yes.

I don't like the term selfish though. It's selfish in a relative sense compared to couples that choose to have children-they have to pour huge amounts of resources and time into childrearing, where as I can use that time for other things. It's not selfish at a all, IMO, at a high-level/humanity view. Certainly, there is no assurance that any child of mine would be a net improvement to the world, and it's not like the world as a whole is hurting for people to do everyday work.

Having children is probably one of the most enjoyable experiences in life. Pregnancy is a beautiful thing. Having your own kids SEEMS like it's a nice experience. I mean, it's your own flesh and blood. Just think of how much love you'll receive from your child, and vice versa.

For some people, children ROCK. It fits their lifestyle perfectly and while I might not want to be around them (I just don't like kids in general), more power to them and their parents. I'm not that way-I do view childrearing as a chore, and see beauty and amazement at other things than having my own kids. It's definitely a personal decision, and, while I think there are some huge advantages to couples not having children in developed countries, its certainly not a view for everyone.

Pregnancy and infancy is just a small, and over-glorified, IMO, set of the whole childrearing cycle. Many kids spend two decades or more with their parents now a days in some fashion. I think people get way too worked up over it because being an expecting couple is all about "HEY LOOK AT ME, WE'RE GONNA HAVE A BAYBEE", whereas the other 95% of the childrearing stage is anything but being about you or your partner.

[demi]

      THIRTEEN COMMON REASONS GIVEN FOR NOT HAVING CHILDREN:

   1. Time together - more time each other and for other interests - selfish
   2. Freedom - more opportunity to pursue other areas of life - selfish
   3. Other children - can enjoy other children, and can help children who are already here through foster parenting or charity work with children - i dont want a child because i want to play with other children?
   4. Dual careers - both people may pursue careers full time, a person (woman) does not have to quit, and a child is not raised by day care - selfish
   5. Financial security - more money to pursue other interests - selfish
   6. Community welfare - greater opportunity to get involved in community organizations - makes no sense
   7. Difficulty - parenthood is a demanding and difficult job which is not always enjoyable - translation: "i can't handle it so i won't do it" - selfish
   8. Strain on environmental resources - the world is already overpopulated and is unable to support the people who are already here - dumbest excuse ever
   9. Increase in overpopulation - having children geometrically increases this problem and all of the problems that come with it - l o l, yeah
  10. Choice not mandate - parenthood has to be a choice, not everyone is meant to be a parent - true, i'll give them this
  11. Irrevocable decision - once the decision is made it cannot be changed, so people must be sure it is what they want - this is #10 reworded
  12. Failure - some people had unhappy or abusive childhoods and fear that they would not be a good parent - this is basically #10 and 11 reworded
  13. Danger - the world is a dangerous place and it is not right to bring a child into it - uhhhhh


What a dumb list. You really don't believe this, do you?

[cloudwalking]

oh come on. i can do the same thing with the other list, it's not going to change my opinion. that was my whole point. what seems selfish to one person doesn't to someone else.

many of the most intelligent people in the world never chose to have children, and have made innumerable contributions to society and the human race -- would you consider these people selfish?

many people believe that their biggest or sole purpose is to have children, that it's the most important thing you can ever do in your life, and that people who don't are selfish and materialistic. not everyone shares this view. you can turn the tables and claim that it's just as selfish to have children, which at the very root of things is driven by selfish and sometimes egotistical motives. if bad parenting comes into play that can have a negative effect on society for the rest of that child's life.

so really, what's more selfish? it's completely subjective.

[demi]

Well when - and if - you reach 50, you can rest assured knowing you have more time for yourself. To do what 50 year olds normally do.

[cloudwalking]

at 50 you're usually constantly daydreaming about retiring and having a little place of your own with the kids out of the picture. if my parents are any indication.

[demi]

Selfish. Big ol' capital S.

[MrAngryFace]

When im 50 im gonna be a big capital SENILE!

















with guns and booze. Im goin out early!

[demi]

Well until I'm chained to the leg with a kid, I'm still up for any booty calls.

[cloudwalking]

Holy shit, this is FOXNEWS-esque propaganda.

well, those are actual answers from a survey done by spencer rathus and jeffery nevid, two psychologists who have done a lot of surveys related to sexuality and reproduction. i can't make this shit up!

[Beezy]

Holy shit, this is FOXNEWS-esque propaganda.

well, those are actual answers from a survey done by spencer rathus and jeffery nevid, two psychologists who have done a lot of surveys related to sexuality and reproduction. i can't make this shit up!

But you can make a baby.

[cloudwalking]

Holy shit, this is FOXNEWS-esque propaganda.

well, those are actual answers from a survey done by spencer rathus and jeffery nevid, two psychologists who have done a lot of surveys related to sexuality and reproduction. i can't make this shit up!

But you can make a baby.

this topic actually comes at a funny time because i have a doctor's appointment to switch birth control methods tomorrow.

[CajoleJuice]

cloud needs the super birth control. 

[Beezy]

Holy shit, this is FOXNEWS-esque propaganda.

well, those are actual answers from a survey done by spencer rathus and jeffery nevid, two psychologists who have done a lot of surveys related to sexuality and reproduction. i can't make this shit up!

But you can make a baby.

this topic actually comes at a funny time because i have a doctor's appointment to switch birth control methods tomorrow.

Haha, I have an appointment with a cardiologist tomorrow (which I just canceled because of an accounting test) to make sure that nothing is wrong with my heart. Your posts in this thread have broken it. :'(

[Eduardo24]

Someday, Dragona will have my baby.

[Flannel Boy]

Someday, Dragona will have my baby.

Man, that will be one whiney, obsessed, power hungry, bitch.

[Junpei the Tracer!]

 

[Phoenix Dark]

I predict Cloud will be pregnant and not married in 6 years

[demi]

I'm going with 4.

[CajoleJuice]

Is this like the time we predicted how long she would stay married?

Oh wait.

...I think this means she's just going to get an abortion.

[cloudwalking]

don't player hate, just because i get more ass than you guys!

...I think this means she's just going to get an abortion.

not outside the realm of possibility. i'm so immoral, ooooooh

[CajoleJuice]

don't player hate, just because i get more ass than you guys!

Not all of us can be stalkers that travel to other continents to get laid.

[demi]

She is afraid of commitment, as this discussion has shown. She will not last marriage either.

[cloudwalking]

don't player hate, just because i get more ass than you guys!

Not all of us can be stalkers that travel to other continents to get laid.

come visit me, cajole