Author Topic: The Official Bore iOS (sometimes Android) Thread of Pretend Gaming  (Read 249119 times)

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Borys

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<ManaByte> MASS EFFECT IPHONE IS BETTER THAN THE CONSOLE ITERATIONS

:lol

chronovore

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Assassin's Creed II: Multiplayer is free for the first 48 hours of release.

Grab it ASAP if you're interested: http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/assassins-creed-ii-multiplayer/id346782480?mt=8

BLESS YOUR HEART. I hate missing out on free stuff. Like beer. Where is the free beer, again?

chronovore

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GTA: Chinatown Wars on iPhone is superior to both the DS and PSP versions.

It has inferior graphics than the PSP iteration, missing pedestrian chatter, they removed quite a bit of music to reduce file size, and due to lack of a second screen there's no easy to access map. Most importantly, both the DS and PSP versions control better thanks to actual d-pad and buttons. The iPhone iteration comes out on top in price since it's selling for a meager $10 (was $7 this weekend) but I'd still place it as the worst simply due to poor controls and the removal of features
Having recently played a LOT of GTA: Chinatown Wars on my DS, I can't really imagine how the controls would translate. I have a hard time in Animal Crossing using a touch screen to pick up fruits or pull grass, and the few "onscreen d-pad" games I've bought for iPod Touch have been an abomination. I thought Rockstar might change the controls for the cars, so the user would touch-and-drag where they want the car to go, moving their contact-point further away from the car for more acceleration, behind it to brake, etc.


Titty lovers are not welcome

Quote
"It came to the point where we were getting customer complaints from women who found the content getting too degrading and objectionable, as well as parents who were upset with what their kids were able to see," Apple's Philip Schiller, head of worldwide product marketing, told the New York Times.

"We obviously care about developers, but in the end have to put the needs of the kids and parents first," he added.

Schiller said things came to a head when "an increasing number of apps containing very objectionable content" were submitted to the Store. Tut tut. [Surely "tit tit". - Ed]
http://www.eurogamer.net/articles/apple-defends-app-store-titillation-purge
:rofl

Apple :yuck  :yuck
Yeah, Apple is new to the game business, having been the joke of it for so long in the home computer community. ("Mac has games like Marathon, Dark Castle, and... um, Photoshop..." ) It doesn't surprise me that they're managing to alienate their devs along with mollycoddling their userbase. Apple and Nintendo share some similar ethos.

Anytime someone comes out and says "Think of the kids!" my immediate, gut reaction is that they're censoring content because they're afraid of the PR mess, or want to be seen as white-hats. This is true with companies and governments alike; any time someone comes out to shill this line of BS, I'm reminded of Heinlein's adage: "The whole principle is wrong; it's like demanding that grown men live on skim milk because the baby can’t eat steak."


When are they going to put Sid Meier's Pirates! on the iPhone already?  This is the only game I really want.
My man. This would be: :rock

ManaByte

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Apple is now pressuring Comic Reader ap makers to remove all synching ability. ComicZeal was forced by Apple to remove USB synching.
CBG

Eel O'Brian

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It's any app that was using usb syncing, not just comic readers.  You can still use WiFi to transfer.

They made Stanza take out USB syncing, too.

Which is why I'll never update Stanza or ComicZeal.

Between stuff like that, and the selectively shady way they made some devs remove "sexy" apps while leaving others alone (Playboy gets to stay?  Really?  I WONDER WHY), I've decided not to get an iPad and just go with a tablet or convertible tablet/netbook.

I don't like knowing they'll go in on a whim and force changes or outright remove apps I've already bought.
« Last Edit: March 03, 2010, 06:10:30 PM by Eel O'Brian »
sup

Hitler Stole My Potato

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Having recently played a LOT of GTA: Chinatown Wars on my DS, I can't really imagine how the controls would translate. I have a hard time in Animal Crossing using a touch screen to pick up fruits or pull grass, and the few "onscreen d-pad" games I've bought for iPod Touch have been an abomination. I thought Rockstar might change the controls for the cars, so the user would touch-and-drag where they want the car to go, moving their contact-point further away from the car for more acceleration, behind it to brake, etc.

I haven't played GTA on my iphone and I agree that onscreen d-pads always suck, but you gotta try it on Space Ore Bust.  It's really the only iphone game that I've played that the onscreen controls work so well that you don't even think about it. 

Not sure if there's a light version out there or not, but if there is you should give it a shot.
Tacos

Eel O'Brian

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Even if it's for a silly reason at least you're no longer buying an iPad.

:piss iPad :piss2

i'm not sure wanting to keep the things i've purchased in the same state i purchased them in is silly
sup

chronovore

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Having recently played a LOT of GTA: Chinatown Wars on my DS, I can't really imagine how the controls would translate. I have a hard time in Animal Crossing using a touch screen to pick up fruits or pull grass, and the few "onscreen d-pad" games I've bought for iPod Touch have been an abomination. I thought Rockstar might change the controls for the cars, so the user would touch-and-drag where they want the car to go, moving their contact-point further away from the car for more acceleration, behind it to brake, etc.

I haven't played GTA on my iphone and I agree that onscreen d-pads always suck, but you gotta try it on Space Ore Bust.  It's really the only iphone game that I've played that the onscreen controls work so well that you don't even think about it. 

Not sure if there's a light version out there or not, but if there is you should give it a shot.

There's no "free"/trial version, so I just used 2.99 of my last 3.16USD to purchase a copy. I assume the usual Evilbore gentlemen's agreement stands: If I don't like it, I get a pound of flesh, and I get to choose how to "pound" and which "flesh" it entails, right?
spoiler (click to show/hide)
:tauntaun
spoiler (click to show/hide)
:-*

Hitler Stole My Potato

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Having recently played a LOT of GTA: Chinatown Wars on my DS, I can't really imagine how the controls would translate. I have a hard time in Animal Crossing using a touch screen to pick up fruits or pull grass, and the few "onscreen d-pad" games I've bought for iPod Touch have been an abomination. I thought Rockstar might change the controls for the cars, so the user would touch-and-drag where they want the car to go, moving their contact-point further away from the car for more acceleration, behind it to brake, etc.

I haven't played GTA on my iphone and I agree that onscreen d-pads always suck, but you gotta try it on Space Ore Bust.  It's really the only iphone game that I've played that the onscreen controls work so well that you don't even think about it. 

Not sure if there's a light version out there or not, but if there is you should give it a shot.

There's no "free"/trial version, so I just used 2.99 of my last 3.16USD to purchase a copy. I assume the usual Evilbore gentlemen's agreement stands: If I don't like it, I get a pound of flesh, and I get to choose how to "pound" and which "flesh" it entails, right?
spoiler (click to show/hide)
:tauntaun
spoiler (click to show/hide)
:-*

It's a deal.  :-*
Tacos

Eel O'Brian

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Even if it's for a silly reason at least you're no longer buying an iPad.

:piss iPad :piss2

i'm not sure wanting to keep the things i've purchased in the same state i purchased them in is silly

Not wanting to purchase an iPad because it's a flaming piece of shit is not as silly as your outrage over Apple's draconian stance on bunch of useless applications. Where were you for the past 20 years? This bullshit is pretty standard MO for Apple. Regardless, you came to your senses so that's all that counts.

i only bought an ipod touch last year, and had never paid attention to apple before that because i had no reason to.  so yeah, i truly was unaware they did stuff like this all the time.

it's not outrage, you're reading far more emotion into it than was present.  it was more of a shrug and a "well, fuck all that.  guess i'll buy a tablet."

i don't really give a crap about booby apps, but here's where it's not useless - apple signs a deal with marvel comics to distribute e-versions of their catalog, which is a possibility give the jobs/disney/marvel connection.  suddenly comic reader mobi, comiczeal, and any other reading app which allows you to load your own comics disappears.  sure, you could keep the ones you already own, but you'd never get a compatability update whenever the OS is upgraded (which is now the situation with apps that use USB syncing).

i already own a netbook and a laptop, so i only want a device like the ipad to do a few things, two of which are reading my own books and comics.  it's come to my attention that both types of apps are in danger of being altered to the point of being useless, or of being forced out altogether.  seeing as i've already paid for some of these apps, and that's all i really want to use the device for, that's not a silly reason for not purchasing.

too bad, i think the iPad would have been perfect for what i wanted to use it for (and i really, really don't care what other people wanted out of it since, you know, i'd be buying it for me).  so, change of plans, no big deal.  i'll just flip the netbook i have now and put the money towards a convertible tablet/netbook instead of selling the ipod touch and putting that towards an iPad.
sup

Eel O'Brian

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sup

Eel O'Brian

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UniWar is free today
« Reply #131 on: March 04, 2010, 10:33:02 AM »
on-topic, UniWar is free today:

http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/uniwar/id311456818?mt=8

If you haven't already bought it, get it.  It's a really good TBS game.
sup

Kestastrophe

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Free sounds about like the right price. I paid a few bucks for it awhile back, but I don't care for it one bit  :yuck
jon

chronovore

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Having recently played a LOT of GTA: Chinatown Wars on my DS, I can't really imagine how the controls would translate. I have a hard time in Animal Crossing using a touch screen to pick up fruits or pull grass, and the few "onscreen d-pad" games I've bought for iPod Touch have been an abomination. I thought Rockstar might change the controls for the cars, so the user would touch-and-drag where they want the car to go, moving their contact-point further away from the car for more acceleration, behind it to brake, etc.

I haven't played GTA on my iphone and I agree that onscreen d-pads always suck, but you gotta try it on Space Ore Bust.  It's really the only iphone game that I've played that the onscreen controls work so well that you don't even think about it. 

Not sure if there's a light version out there or not, but if there is you should give it a shot.

There's no "free"/trial version, so I just used 2.99 of my last 3.16USD to purchase a copy. I assume the usual Evilbore gentlemen's agreement stands: If I don't like it, I get a pound of flesh, and I get to choose how to "pound" and which "flesh" it entails, right?
spoiler (click to show/hide)
:tauntaun
spoiler (click to show/hide)
:-*

It's a deal.  :-*


Wow, this game rocks! (No pun intended.  :-[) Cute story, gorgeous art, and you're right the touch-screen controls are very intelligently implemented. I could use a little more foreground art to give a stronger impression of movement; I find myself flying while watching the radar more than the main screen.

Disappointingly, your flesh is safe... for now.

bork

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Street Fighter IV is out.  Downloading now; looking forward to the LOLZ.
ど助平

Eric P

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Doom 2 RPG is great but I have gotten turned around and lost on the section I'm on so I've dropped it.

There's also a great adaption of Fighting Fantasy, the old rpg / choose your own adventure books from Steve Jackson games.  The book handles all the "paper work" that made the game aspect kind of horrible
Tonya

bork

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Thanks for taking one for the team. I'm convinced it's going to be crap but then again they could pull off a different but still decent version of the game.


I knew going in that SF4 iPhone was just going to be a novelty.  But I'll say this-- it's much better than it should be.  Somehow, despite the shitty touchscreen interface, cramped controls that take up half the screen, and prerendered fighters going at a frame rate that cannot be 60fps, they made this game work.  You can't do everything, but you can do a surprisingly large amount of the same combos and tactics that work on the console versions.  FADCs are in and all that.  I had some trouble getting moves off at first, but then I stopped paying attention to the virtual joystick and focused on the directional ring surrounding it, and it just clicked.  For those who have trouble doing moves, you can turn on move assists (just hit the special button and a direction, and ultras and supers can also be done just by tapping the meters).  There's also an autoblock option.  Again, treat this as a novelty -there are some people giving it heaps of praise elsewhere (GAF, lol), and they are crazy- but it's still a fun little time waster.  I've gone from thinking it was a bad game to something that's fun to play around with in short bursts.  The game has eight playable characters, an arcade mode, training, dojo, and versus (human or CPU) modes, plus match replays can be saved.  The prerendered character models have a lot of detail and animate pretty smoothly, for the most part.  Stages are just static backgrounds, but the music is all there, sans "Indestructable," which is probably a good thing anyway.  But while this port has turned out better than I expected, it's still nothing to get hyped up over and poor compared to the real SF4.  Definitely the best fighter on iPhone, not that this is really saying much of anything.   :lol  $9.99 is too high of a price; I'd say the curious should go for it when it drops to $5 or less.
ど助平

naff

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Re: Rock Band coming to iPhone with 4-way Bluetooth multi-player mode
« Reply #137 on: March 11, 2010, 10:38:46 PM »
Anyone who says Guitar Hero milks the games and RB doens't is in de nile.

Rock Band
Rock Band 2
Rock Band Unplugged
The Beatles: Rock Band
Rock Band Mobile
Lego Rock Band

vs.

Guitar Hero
Guitar Hero II
Guitar Hero Encore: Rocks the 80s
Guitar Hero III: Legends of Rock
Guitar Hero III: Mobile
Guitar Hero III: Backstage Pass
Guitar Hero World Tour
Guitar Hero World Tour Mobile
Guitar Hero Smash Hits
Guitar Hero 5
Guitar Hero 5 Mobile
Guitar Hero: Aerosmith
Guitar Hero: Metallica
Guitar Hero: Van Halen
Guitar Hero On Tour
Guitar Hero On Tour: Decades
Guitar Hero On Tour: Modern Hits
Band Hero
DJ Hero

 ???


Soon to be joined by Greenday: Rockband also

 :-X
(_,_)

GilloD

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Space Miner: Space Ore or Bust is on sale for $1.99 - totally worth it, imo.  It's basically Asteroids mixed with an RPG but it's completely addicitive.  I just keep going back to it time and time again so I can upgrade my ship even further.



And I may be a humongous cigarillo but I can't help but love the Virtual Villagers games (2, and 3 especially).  It's like animal crossing/The Sims combined with an ant farm fused with Survivor.  You don't have real control over your people on the island but you can eventually make them learn behaviors like becoming builders, scientists, farmers, doctors, etc. and they can mate to expand your population but you have to figure out ways to create sustainable food sources, housing, researching technology, etc. to allow them to live, if not they die.  They'll kick the bucket either from old age, accidents, famine, disease, etc. so you have to keep going back to it time and time again to check up on the people 'cause it runs in the background all the time regardless if you're playing it or not.  Plus there's a series of goals and mysteries you have to solve and or perform to "win" the game so it's not all completely pointless.  IMO, the VV games are the best bang for the buck on the entire iTunes store.


I also love Virtual Villagers, but I hated that that it wasn't a sim as much as a bunch of linear puzzles strung together like a sim- i.e., in VV2, you have to figure out how to farm before you run out of fish. That's always a linear sequence- You WILL run out of fish in like 60 days or whatever, so if you don't figure out farming, then you'll die. You can;t like branch out into other techs and then come back around, you have to proceed in a certain way.
wha

bork

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I bought Wolfenstein RPG the other day and it's really fun!  First iPhone game I have ever enjoyed playing this much. 
ど助平

cool breeze

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[youtube=560,345]vuiXjmhZ4-8[/youtube]

wow

Bebpo

  • Senior Member
If the framerate wasn't so terrible it'd be almost as good as a medium-budget psp game.

Might check it out if it's cheap out of curiosity, but I don't think the graphic whore in me can handle that framerate.

Chinner

  • Member
« Last Edit: March 18, 2010, 08:54:33 AM by Chinner »

Borys

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[youtube=560,345]vuiXjmhZ4-8[/youtube]

wow

Damn Wii is *really* weaker than iPhone.

How humiliating for Nintendo :lol

ManaByte

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Really impressed with FF and FF2.
CBG

GilloD

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I hear the 2nd Fighting Fantasy game is an unplayable mess, but the first one is a lot of fun. It's a Choose Yoru Own Adventure books with dice rolling! Bonnnerrr.

Anyone else get We Rule! ? It's Farmville for the App Store and I could use some invites to expand my land.
wha

bork

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It still plays a hell of a lot better than it should.  Capcom is to be commended on that, but yeah, these types of games just don't work well on touch screens.

[youtube=560,345][/youtube]

[youtube=560,345][/youtube]

The only iPhone game I have found myself really enjoying is Wolfenstein RPG - a cell phone port-.
« Last Edit: March 22, 2010, 08:54:36 PM by Good Day Sir »
ど助平

ManaByte

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[youtube=560,345][/youtube]

AWESOME game.
CBG

bork

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That does look awesome...so close to the original video!  I think I'm gonna have to buy it.
ど助平

GilloD

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Treasure Grab is really good! Why is no one talking about it?
wha

chronovore

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I'm still playing Space Miner thanks to an earlier recommendation in this thread; I finished normal mode and thought, "That was a lot of fun, but it was a little too easy." I went straight into a HardCore (it should be called HardcOre) run. It's not so easy any more.

maxy

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[youtube=560,345][/youtube]

iPhone :bow2
cat

Reb

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brb

ManaByte

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Dig Dug and Galaga both crash immediately on iOS4, so it's a waste of money for those.
CBG

pilonv1

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Man, iOS4 has kind of been of a clusterfuck. From the first generation not even being able to utilize it, to apps slowing down on 3G/3GS phones, to apps not even running at all!

Haven't had any slowdown on my 3GS, but the gf's 3G is running like a Wii right now. It's disgraceful.
itm

ManaByte

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Rayman 2 runs awesomely on the iPhone 4 and looks as good as the DC port.
CBG

Sho Nuff

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Is Rayman actually playable though? I remember that game being kinda frustratingly hard using a Dreamcast pad... I can't imagine playing it with a touch screen.

Reb

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Pros: Good music; plenty of game to be played
Cons: Controls are a mess; screen seems too small for the game; feels outdated.
Bottom line: Rayman 2 is a dated 3D platformer gimped by the iPhone's limitations.

http://www.slidetoplay.com/story/rayman-2-the-great-escape-review
brb

bork

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I picked up Ridge Racer Accelerated.  I never played the game before this latest update, but I know they added some new control schemes.  Didn't even try to use the accelerometer scheme and went right for the d-pad style set-up, which has left and right steering buttons (like a Playstation controller) and gas and accel.  Works pretty decently and the game runs really smoothly on the iPhone 4.  It choked when I tried to use the custom music option, however, and the frame rate can't touch the PSP version.

Also I see that the Macintosh classic Spectre VR is out for iPhone!  There's a lite version you can try; controls are pretty good.  I will probably pick this up.
« Last Edit: July 05, 2010, 04:12:34 PM by Good Day Sir »
ど助平

Sho Nuff

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Does Spectre VR have drop-in play, like I can jump into someone's server without having to make my own and wait for people to join up?

Also: I thought about Ridge Racer but then I heard that Namco was doing that nickel-and-dime bullshit where you only get one track and they try to sell the others separately. God when are the Japanese going to get it

bork

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Does Spectre VR have drop-in play, like I can jump into someone's server without having to make my own and wait for people to join up?

Also: I thought about Ridge Racer but then I heard that Namco was doing that nickel-and-dime bullshit where you only get one track and they try to sell the others separately. God when are the Japanese going to get it

I haven't purchased Spectre yet, but I saw reviews saying barely anyone was ever online.   :-\

And yeah, you have to buy a track and car pack to get everything in Ridge Racer.  I love the game so I went and ahead and bent over for Namco. 
ど助平

Sho Nuff

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Blurgh. I'd like some kind of decent game where I can pop in for a quick play. NOVA is pretty good in having people online, but their deathmatch maps are not the best. Doesn't have to be an action game, just something where I can blow a few minutes. (UNO is pretty good for this.)

Sho Nuff

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Has anyone played Archetype? It's the new FPS game and apparently it controls pretty well.

Eel O'Brian

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i bought driver for a buck during the sale, controls surprisingly well

it's pretty much...driver
sup

Van Cruncheon

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I picked up Ridge Racer Accelerated.  I never played the game before this latest update, but I know they added some new control schemes.  Didn't even try to use the accelerometer scheme and went right for the d-pad style set-up, which has left and right steering buttons (like a Playstation controller) and gas and accel.  Works pretty decently and the game runs really smoothly on the iPhone 4.  It choked when I tried to use the custom music option, however, and the frame rate can't touch the PSP version.

Also I see that the Macintosh classic Spectre VR is out for iPhone!  There's a lite version you can try; controls are pretty good.  I will probably pick this up.

ridge racer at sub-60fps is an AFFRONT
duc

ManaByte

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Will get MI2 when its on sale like I did with the original.
CBG

bork

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Yes, the frame rate in RR Accelerated is not the rock-solid PSP version, but it runs pretty well on the iPhone 4.  People said after the last update a week or two ago the game felt better.

I'd get Real Racing since they enhanced it for the iPhone 4, but it seems pretty sim-like and I'm not into those kinds of racers. 
ど助平

Cormacaroni

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Lost about 3hrs to Plants vs Zombies HD on the iPad the other day. Really fun, super slick presentation. A steal if you haven't played it to death already.
vjj

bork

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Babylonian Twins is free right now.

Has anyone played The Quest?  It's an old-old-school first-person RPG done in the same style as the old Dungeon Master games on PC.
ど助平

Brehvolution

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My very first app was bought due to the nagging of my daughter. Oregon Trail!

Which is fitting considering Oregon Trail was one of the first video games I ever played in the computer lab at middle school. On a monochrome Mac, it loaded off of a 5 1/4 floppy.
©ZH

Sho Nuff

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Helsing's Fire is a pretty cool game. It's all about raycasting.

bork

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I really hope there will be some quality WRPGs on the Iphone. Square is already a player and its weird, Bethesda/Bioware etc are not getting into this at all.

Try The Quest.
ど助平

E-DuB

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So Civ Revolution is free right now. No idea why but it's looks like it's worth a download
::)

Sho Nuff

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So Civ Revolution is free right now. No idea why but it's looks like it's worth a download

YOINK

pilonv1

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fuck yes
itm

Wario64

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civ rev is only free for a day apparently

chronovore

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civ rev is only free for a day apparently
And for once, I'm actually paying attention at the right time.

YOINK!

Sho Nuff

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(Image removed from quote.)

Website :rofl

It's so stupid, I love it. You can buy one at a Best Buy store or order it online. Once done you'll need to download the FREE game to take advantage of the accessory. Although the game is free it won't work properly unless you have the dinky pinball shell.

Wait WTF? How the hell does that not work without the accessory? Does it send inputs through the port?

ch1nchilla

  • Senior Member
TOMORROW. DODONPACHI. $5. ZOMG ZOMG ZOMG.



This 400+MB behemoth of a JRPG (actually KRPG) is out now.
Crimson Gem Saga, a port of a PSP title, $10.
I am grabbing it for shits and giggles. Seriously, how bad can it be?

I bought it too because people (Che) were swooning over it on Twitter. Haven't played it at all yet, though.

Wario64

  • Junior Member
monster dash is sorta fun, by studio that brought fruit ninja. it's only a buck.