Random talk thread: It just keeps happening

[Kara]

That story needs to be next to "petty as fuck" in the dictionary.

agree 100%

e: It was the rehearsal not the wedding itself.

[TVC15]

my roommate said "normally I don't say anything but that sounded like a shit someone makes after they die."

did you cum at the same time?

[Phoenix Dark]

Wait, how did she notice you didn't eat? Also did you ever say you weren't hungry or did oh simply not say anything.

[Kara]

Wait, how did she notice you didn't eat? Also did you ever say you weren't hungry or did oh simply not say anything.

You had to line up to get your food since there were so many people there, and she was always hanging around the line managing the situation because she was a good host. The beer was kept at the end of the line, so I was always walking by the line to get beer without ever entering it myself. Also, she had developed a (I'm sure we can all agree) well-founded dislike for me during my descent into arch piece of shit-ness, which I'm sure put me on her radar that night to begin with.

If his mom had confronted me directly I would have said I wasn't hungry, but she didn't because she knew I would have said that. My mom told me that she didn't want me to cause a fucking scene and that I should go get some god damn food so I did. My high school best friend's mom gave me a good when I got in line, but I don't think she understood that instead of putting me in my place, she was just further letting me know that my pettiness had been engaged instead of disregarded as the pettiness of a fucking piece of shit.

e: Another lowlight from this wedding - the bride said something to my mother on the day of the actual wedding to the effect of, "I have to be honest Umm Karakand, I really did not like your son for a number of years, but now I finally think I get him and know he's a funny guy... in his way."

During this time period in my life I also once waited 2 years to pull a reprisal practical joke on someone, can that be definition #2 next to "petty as fuck" in the Devoford-English Dictionary?

[Phoenix Dark]

I feel like shit today. Maybe it wasn't just the White Castle? I bought some snacks from the dollar store late last night - Hot Tamales, some bacon cheddar chips, and Raisinets. I think I'm gonna try to purge my body and just not eat for a couple days, only water.

[TVC15]

I'm going to have to take today off I think. I'm just having a bad mental day and my head is fighting against me. I need to go home and use the nuclear option.

[Himu]

I feel like shit today. Maybe it wasn't just the White Castle? I bought some snacks from the dollar store late last night - Hot Tamales, some bacon cheddar chips, and Raisinets. I think I'm gonna try to purge my body and just not eat for a couple days, only water.

How about you stop eating shit food

[TVC15]

I feel like shit today. Maybe it wasn't just the White Castle? I bought some snacks from the dollar store late last night - Hot Tamales, some bacon cheddar chips, and Raisinets. I think I'm gonna try to purge my body and just not eat for a couple days, only water.

How about you stop eating shit food

Have any purple drink yesterday, Miss Thang?

[Kara]

I'm going to have to take today off I think. I'm just having a bad mental day and my head is fighting against me. I need to go home and use the nuclear option.

Get well soon breh.

You too PD.

[Phoenix Dark]

I feel like shit today. Maybe it wasn't just the White Castle? I bought some snacks from the dollar store late last night - Hot Tamales, some bacon cheddar chips, and Raisinets. I think I'm gonna try to purge my body and just not eat for a couple days, only water.

How about you stop eating shit food

I was talking to TVC about this. My problem with fast food is that I do weird binges. Normally I might eat Taco Bell once a month, and that's my only fast food. But every few months I find myself going on a week long binge of eating out. A couple weeks ago I eat out every day, seven days straight: two local taco places, White Castle, Wendys, Taco Bell, and a local gyro place. Yesterday was seemingly a continuation of that behavior...but I'm not buying shit today fuck it.

Weight gain isn't an issue due to my work out regimen, I just feel like SHIT. And I need to stop doing this. I

[Yulwei]

very nice breeze today. yesterday was so hot i could barely breathe

[Himu]

I feel like shit today. Maybe it wasn't just the White Castle? I bought some snacks from the dollar store late last night - Hot Tamales, some bacon cheddar chips, and Raisinets. I think I'm gonna try to purge my body and just not eat for a couple days, only water.

How about you stop eating shit food

Have any purple drink yesterday, Miss Thang?

No. It has sugar in it.

[Shadow Mod]

Going to water today, can't wait. 

[Brehvolution]

89F out
"Feels like 96F"

humidity

[TVC15]

81f
feels like 89f

[Shadow Mod]

Went outside at like 11 am and was baking, I know it has to miserable elsewhere if it's upper nineties in the PNW.

[G The Resurrected]

Fridge just decided to shit itself and break down. This day is just crap so far.

[Kara]

80
Feels like: 80

Tonight: 62

 

[Shadow Mod]

80
Feels like: 80

Tonight: 62

 

Like you're going outside today anyway.

[Kara]

Like you're going outside today anyway.

Annihilated.

[Kara]

Speaking of work, the spouse of the person whose office I was working in this morning was there (this isn't the spouse who hangs out with me now) and asked me what I was doing for the 4th, to which I replied, "Probably working. "

Holy cow they went nuclear on me after I said that. "KARAKAND WE'RE GOING TO HAVE TO HAVE LUNCH SOMETIME SO I CAN TALK TO YOU ABOUT HOW YOU'RE WORKING TOO MUCH."

1.  Have lunch? You mean the nutrient gruel I consume while driving between clients?
2. Who gives a shit? Americans died so that I could god damn well work on the 4th of July (without holiday pay) if I damn well want to. 
3. I didn't say any of these things because I'm a coward and a liar, naturally.

The person I work for literally had to tell their spouse to leave me alone so I could get my work done at a certain point in their ceaseless diatribe.

[Shadow Mod]

Sunburned 

[Atramental]

2nd boss had me wait all afternoon for some assets.

Assets haven't shown up in my inbox and it's 11:30 pm at night.

Fuck him and his bullshit. I'm going to sleep...

[Positive Touch]

Bothered me a bit cause I had to walk ten miles to get home,

lololol wat

[chronovore]

I feel like shit today. Maybe it wasn't just the White Castle? I bought some snacks from the dollar store late last night - Hot Tamales, some bacon cheddar chips, and Raisinets. I think I'm gonna try to purge my body and just not eat for a couple days, only water.

Try laying off greasy food, and so much sugar. I hadn't had much sugar in a couple months, had a candy bar and a Vietnamese iced coffee which was about 20% condensed milk; I felt like garbage for the next 36 hours.

There are studies which say that sugar, not just glucose and HFCS, but even fruity-fruit-from-fruits fructose is just really bad for us.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnews/10559671/Sugar-is-as-dangerous-as-alcohol-and-tobacco-warn-health-experts.html

Then again, you reported some toilet troubles -- you may be dealing with a larger digestive problem. Maybe try some brown rice, yogurt, and veggies for a few days, see if it clears up?

[Kara]

Sunburned 

Spending your life in a florescent-lit dungeon has its perks. 

[Shadow Mod]

Sunburned 

Spending your life in a florescent-lit dungeon has its perks. 

Yeah looking sickly and pasty.

Have fun on the dating circuit in LA of all places with that.

[Himu]

La dating that bad?

[Kara]

Pallid flesh.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Dev never lets me win.

[close]

e: If you have no expectations LA dating isn't bad. If you have a type or think too highly of yourself, well I hope you're a hottie and / or loaded.

[Madrun Badrun]

I had a strange and awesome day. Here it is in order:

1- Payed all my bills and sent some documents over to my dad.

2- Went to the World Cup centric bar to watch the USA play. And got to start 4 different "USA!" chants. Just doing one was a lifelong dream of mine. Highlight of the day easily.

3- Hooked up with a deaf girl by driving with her to the catskills and getting busy in the car for the first time in my life after the game. Then she dropped the news that she has a BF after the fact which kind of sucks but gave me a clean exit. Bothered me a bit cause I had to walk ten miles to get home, but then again it was beautiful outside so I enjoyed the walk none the less.

4- After arriving home, said fuck it and just took a shower before heading back out to the bars for a few more beers.

5- While heading back got a flashlight shined on me by cops where their dog started sniffing me while they asked me questions. I was clean and didn't end up profiled or anything. They let me go after just 5 minutes and since I was already close to home I just walked up and got in.

What a weird yet cool day. It's like my own version of Ice Cube's most memorable hit.

I've always wanted to bang a deaf girl.  Did she sound like Arnold Schwarzenegger?  That is my fantasy. 

[Himu]

I feel like shit today. Maybe it wasn't just the White Castle? I bought some snacks from the dollar store late last night - Hot Tamales, some bacon cheddar chips, and Raisinets. I think I'm gonna try to purge my body and just not eat for a couple days, only water.

How about you stop eating shit food

I thought the same thing, but this is rich from someone eating Dominos chicken nuggets the other day.

Just one day. I threw the rest away. And they weren't chicken nuggets.

[Madrun Badrun]

She gipped you of the Schwarzenegger experience.  Probably saves that shit for her boyfriend. 

[Kara]

My new therapist is really rad, I set the table for it to be productive during intake + session 2 and they've been making it productive. It's better to engage in the (very few) things about me that are legitimately good instead of playing the stupid fucking games I play in the garbage dump that's the rest of me.

They also actually want to understand how hellish my current career really is, which most people dgaf about or treat as just another neurosis of mine (which I can understand given who I am). They asked me to describe a typical day so I told them about working from 8:30 - 23:00 recently and only really being paid for ~10:00 of that and they were all, "So you weren't embellishing.  "

[Kara]

CPA: "Karakand, I'm glad you're here. [Ed.'s note - I edit the text components of financial statements and formal letters / communications for this CPA.] I loaned someone some money and need them to start paying me back--anything back really--because they aren't paying me anything right now. How do you think I should phrase my request that they pay [paltry sum] to me a week? 'So and so, I'd like you to start paying me [paltry sum] a week on the loan I made to you, is that something you can handle?'"

Me: [Makes quip about being a loan shark.] "How about, 'Would you be amenable to paying [paltry sum] per week on the loan I made to you?' By phrasing it that way you give them room to make a counter-offer."

CPA: "Amenable is a word you would use, I don't want to sound like I'm talking like you. I like your structure and the space to make a counter-offer though, so I'll use what you suggested, but with agreeable instead of amenable."

Thanks mom and dad.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

I convinced them to use amenable because amenable has clear legal implications as a word while agreeable is just a broad term.

[close]

[Squiddy]

CPA: "Karakand, I'm glad you're here. [Ed.'s note - I edit the text components of financial statements and formal letters / communications for this CPA.] I loaned someone some money and need them to start paying me back--anything back really--because they aren't paying me anything right now. How do you think I should phrase my request that they pay [paltry sum] to me a week? 'So and so, I'd like you to start paying me [paltry sum] a week on the loan I made to you, is that something you can handle?'"

Me: [Makes quip about being a loan shark.] "How about, 'Would you be amenable to paying [paltry sum] per week on the loan I made to you?' By phrasing it that way you give them room to make a counter-offer."

CPA: "Amenable is a word you would use, I don't want to sound like I'm talking like you. I like your structure and the space to make a counter-offer though I'll use what you suggested, but with agreeable instead of amenable."

Thanks mom and dad.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

I convinced them to use amenable because amenable has clear legal implications as a word while agreeable is just a broad term.

[close]

What is your job title?

I literally have no idea what you do and why it seems like such a terrible job.

[Kara]

(Corporate) tax accountant.

e: I do the things a CPA or EA would do if it either wasn't soul crushing or cost ineffective for them to do themselves. The majority of this work being the preparation of corporate tax returns.

[Squiddy]

(Corporate) tax accountant.

 

[chronovore]

Karakand, is there any reason you can't quit and go do another CPA, establish a different communication dynamic with the new company?

[brob]

horrid (read:market regulated) working conditions is how the good communist makes penance for capitalist labour. 

[Himu]

Today's haul

[Phoenix Dark]

Karakand, is there any reason you can't quit and go do another CPA, establish a different communication dynamic with the new company?

Or become a CPA and coast on your title (not now, but later when you're able to dedicate to it). Or apply for a Big Four job. Lots of work, but less than you're doing now.

[chronovore]

Today's haul

[/IMG]http://i.imgur.com/ePU7aHX.jpg?1[/img]

http://www.thebore.com/forum/index.php?topic=33098.0

[Kara]

I thought that story was funny, tone deaf writing y'all. 

Karakand, is there any reason you can't quit and go do another CPA, establish a different communication dynamic with the new company?

I'd love to do a CPA. Work-related stress sex.

Anyway, I don't work for a CPA, or in one company. I just use "CPA" (or "client") in these stories so that you don't develop preferences or biases for or against CPA #1 or client #7 if you read my fucking bullshit, and also to maintain some air of confidentiality via ambiguity.

The closest thing I have to what I think you think I have is a patron who is a CPA, I would say 80% of my operation stems from them (or people I met through them). By patron I mean that someone comes to that CPA and says, "Hey, I need some work done, but I don't want to pay you to do it, can you help me out?" so my patron gives them my name and number, they call me and describe the work that they need done and I go and do it. I haven't had to write a resume or formally interview for something in almost 5 years, my patron's reference (or the reference of someone I met through my patron) gets me in the door no questions asked. I don't think I even have business cards anymore.

I am heavily embedded in a few offices, by that I mean I'm there several times a week for several hours. They have so much work I just work on open-ended contracts instead of term ones.

As for why I don't quit, well I'm in the process of changing careers (I decided to). That's not really something that's going to happen overnight, and I have to do it responsibly because if I don't it'll just blowback on my patron.

If my career change doesn't work out I would just take the EA exam, PD. While providing lower earning potential long-term, going for a CPA myself (especially after the investment in the career change) is impractical for a variety of reasons. EAs can still coast on their title (I work for some that do), it's just that ones that run their own firms are the accounting equivalent of public defenders (i.e. they represent people you aren't thrilled to have as clients) so I'd try and be a full-time cog in some larger operation. (A tax law firm, for example.)

[Shadow Mod]

One of these days I need to take a pic of the hipster as fuck blankets we have here. Got another one today at the bins. 

[Broseidon]

Just been for a meal. Too full

[Kara]

In LA right now. Forgot how gross and smoggy the air was, how terrible the water is, how annoying the people are

Breh, OCWD water makes (LA) DWP water taste like Fiji.

[chronovore]

In LA right now. Forgot how gross and smoggy the air was, how terrible the water is, how annoying the people are

I grew up there, and used to feel the same way. The truth is, the air quality was worse when I was a kid (pre-unleaded fuel, pre-fuel-efficient cars, catalytic converters were new); I was a young dickhead, so all the people seemed horrible; and the water was horrible.

When I visit L.A. now, the air is better than then, and people seem legitimately nice (which hopefully means I'm less of a dick), but the water is still horrible.

[etiolate]

The air qualiry is still terrible. I began choking on my way into the city. It's just nasty.

[Atramental]

Just finished writing my resignation letter for my 2nd employer and I'll be sending it to him on Monday.

Hopefully things will go smoothly. 

[Kara]

Hopefully. How many weeks notice will you be giving? (And how does that compare to the expected amount of notice in your industry?)

-----

Speaking of jobs, I think I just signed up for the most hellish one I've ever worked in my life. I'm talking Le Salaire de la Peur tier (but at le salaire du sans-culotte tier compensation, natch). I promise I won't complain about it here, Biz, but I might post some (what I find to be at least) funny stories involving the people I will be working for. (The work itself won't be hellish, the people I'll be working for will be what makes it hellish.)

At least I'll be working for the Tribe. (Which for some reason the person who pawned this gig off on me felt it was important for me to know about despite not knowing I'm Jewish? Casual anti-Semitism y'all.)

[Atramental]

Hopefully. How many weeks notice will you be giving? (And how does that compare to the expected amount of notice in your industry?

4 weeks and it seems to vary in my profession (graphic design).

My 2nd employer, a month ago, told me there weren't many graphic designers that he knew that would be willing to work for him. Well no shit. Probably because you're cheap, your hours suck ass, and your project management skills leave something to be desired. The only reason why I was working for him is because my primary employer wasn't able to hire me as a full time employee so he leased my services out to this friend of his. (side note: Both my primary and secondary employers work in the same building)

This was supposed to be a temporary arrangement but my 2nd employer loves my cheap $10 dollars ($12 for overtime...) an hour labor.

Also, once I get untangled from this mess and I'm going to start planning my escape from my primary employer because I can already tell that he doesn't want to hire me full time nor raise my hourly wage even though my Art Director sees me as a highly beneficial asset to the company's creative department.

[Kara]

That wage.

It varies but is 4 weeks on the higher (i.e. more considerate) end of the spread, or does it really just depend on how big the operation is? (If you were a graphic designer at a big firm I imagine you'd have to give months notice.) It sounds like that employer knows they chew through people, so it doesn't sound like they'll hold a grudge?

Good for you for getting out of an exploitative sitch and deciding to work on an overall exit strategy though, I think you'll feel a lot better in the long run (provided you land on your feet, of course).

[Atramental]

That wage.

It varies but is 4 weeks on the higher (i.e. more considerate) end of the spread, or does it really just depend on how big the operation is? (If you were a graphic designer at a big firm I imagine you'd have to give months notice.) It sounds like that employer knows they chew through people, so it doesn't sound like they'll hold a grudge?

Both companies are fairly small.

The 1st one only has 8 full-time employees, 2 interns (I believe unpaid?), & 1 part-time employee (me).
the 2nd one only has 3 full-time employees, 1 part-time employee, & 1 "part-time" employee (me).

And I'm at the point now that IDGF if he holds a grudge against me. The guy is around my age, went to BJU a couple of years, graduated from Liberty (largest Christian university in the US), and a month ago he told me, when we were driving to a client meeting, that if the US stopped being a haven for capitalism that he'd probably move somewhere else. 

Good for you for getting out of an exploitative sitch and deciding to work on an overall exit strategy though, I think you'll feel a lot better in the long run (provided you land on your feet, of course).

Thanks.

And yeah, hopefully I'll be better off in 2 or 3 years. Just need to buckle down, get my portfolio spruced up, and start looking for jobs out of state.

[TVC15]

It's a bad day. I wish I had something that would put me to sleep.

[CatsCatsCats]

Drive down and do some dab hits, it'll knock ya right out

[Pickles the Firecat]

In LA right now. Forgot how gross and smoggy the air was, how terrible the water is, how annoying the people are

Driving back to LA from San Diego and seeing the smog and traffic start around Long Beach there's always a moment of "wait, why the fuck am I coming back here again?".

You take the good with the bad brehs.

[TVC15]

Where do I get dab hits?

[CatsCatsCats]

My place 

[Broseidon]

gl atra dude

[Phoenix Dark]

Kitten intellect brehs. They hound me for food, jumping on my legs n shit. Then I'm like aite, let's go get some food. Once I get up and head towards the laundry room (where their food bowls are) they start celebrating. Then we get there...and there's already food in the fucking bowls. And they have the audacity to give me the look on some "ohhhh, I had no idea there was already food available for us! Thanks human."