Author Topic: Pallando will return in "Never Say Never Again" (Read 1233909 times)

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #10800 on:** December 18, 2016, 04:57:25 PM »

fuck snap. I'm assuming you can't smash her at her parents house. Invite her to your place today to "watch Netflix or something." Have some snacks, pop...liquor. Cuddle up on her and just chill. Use the snacks as nut bait: she'll inevitably say something like "I shouldn't be eating this, I'm already fat..." Then you say "well you look good to me..." If you can't get her naked after that then cut your dick off.

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #10801 on:** December 18, 2016, 05:02:47 PM »

PD how much Pokemon snap did you play as a kid?

TakingBackSunday · « **Reply #10802 on:** December 18, 2016, 05:03:18 PM »

Quote from: BrandNew on December 14, 2016, 08:44:18 PM

This thread is depressing

.

CatsCatsCats · « **Reply #10803 on:** December 18, 2016, 05:05:23 PM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on December 18, 2016, 04:57:25 PM

fuck snap. I'm assuming you can't smash her at her parents house. Invite her to your place today to "watch Netflix or something." Have some snacks, pop...liquor. Cuddle up on her and just chill. Use the snacks as nut bait: she'll inevitably say something like "I shouldn't be eating this, I'm already fat..." Then you say "well you look good to me..." If you can't get her naked after that then cut your dick off.

Atramental · « **Reply #10804 on:** December 18, 2016, 06:07:05 PM »

She has Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday off this week.

I absolutely can not miss Mondays at work. I'm going to see if I can do a bullshit "work from home" thing for Thursday. But then I have to drive her back to her place later...

Fridays and the weekend are basically my only days that I can fuck on. $:-\$

CatsCatsCats · « **Reply #10805 on:** December 18, 2016, 06:08:09 PM »

If you fuck on thurs, let her stay the night and take her in the morning

Atramental · « **Reply #10806 on:** December 18, 2016, 06:10:43 PM »

We'd have to wake up fairly early though.

If we fucked Thursday night I have would have leave my house around 6. And then we would arrive at her place around 6:30 or so. Then I would have to fight traffic back to Greenville and pray I get to my office at 9.

This would be SOOOO much simpler if she had a car. $:-\$

Huff · « **Reply #10807 on:** December 18, 2016, 06:17:12 PM »

Fuck her than call an uber for her to get back home

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #10808 on:** December 18, 2016, 07:24:53 PM »

Regardless...fuck her on Thursday or Friday. You really don't have an excuse at this point dude. She's DTF, she's completely free on Friday, you're relatively free on Friday...

Hell, what are you doing on Saturday? Bring her on Friday and she can stay the night.

Atramental · « **Reply #10809 on:** December 18, 2016, 07:40:04 PM »

I'll do Friday.

Too much could go wrong on those other days.

CatsCatsCats · « **Reply #10810 on:** December 18, 2016, 07:42:13 PM »

You got this shit

fistfulofmetal · « **Reply #10811 on:** December 18, 2016, 08:12:40 PM »

Bout to be your best Christmas gift so far

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #10812 on:** December 18, 2016, 08:51:28 PM »

http://sluttygirlproblems.com/guide/the-cat-coital-alignment-technique/#.WFc84rnwDMA

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

Atramental · « **Reply #10813 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:08:16 PM »

Is there video of this technique somewhere?

I'm a visual learner.

Himu · « **Reply #10814 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:14:24 PM »

Save up your stock this week so when you guys finally do it you can spray paint her tits white.

nudemacusers · « **Reply #10815 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:14:33 PM »

just rock up and down, shits easy and works. can get my wife to leave me alone in a couple of minutes

as the link states... you're really not going in an out at all when you do this. once you get aggressive about it it kinda feels like your dick is kinda bending in half cuz she'll be gyrating toward climax and the base of your dick is taking care of the clit in an rubbing up and down fashion at the same time, cuz contrary to the guide you can be balls deep but it will hurt a bit. but maybe pain is good.

Atramental · « **Reply #10816 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:19:09 PM »

Shit. I need buy some extra pillows for Friday.

Quote from: Queen of Ice on December 18, 2016, 09:14:24 PM

Save up your stock this week so when you guys finally do it you can spray paint her tits white.

But my nice bed sheets tho.

edit: better buy some extra bed sheets as well.

fistfulofmetal · « **Reply #10817 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:23:23 PM »

Go down on her. Do it you fucking pussy.

Himu · « **Reply #10818 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:29:06 PM »

Quote from: Pallando on December 18, 2016, 09:08:16 PM

Is there video of this technique somewhere?

I'm a visual learner.

All you need to do is kiss her. Work down. Kiss her neck a bit and tease it but don't give her a hickie, then suck and lick them nipples (don't bite because it hurts), keep kissing all the down to her pussy and suck her clit. Unfold it so that the really sensitive part is exposed and go to town. When she's ready, stick it in and let it rip.

As a virgin, you probably won't last long so savor it and don't put p in v on a pedastal. Eat her out and prolong it so that the experience is fun and not short af. Actively going for foreplay will keep you in the running and make her probably want to see you again ASAP because too many dudes think with their dicks and as a virgin you naturally won't be good at sex. Foreplay will give you an advantage.

Dudes who enjoy foreplay are the hottest. A man who wants to make you moan by licking your nipples before sticking it in is a five star mother fucker. Never under estimate boob play. I can get orgasm just by having my breasts sucked. Try to hold off and build up the sexual tension as much as you can. Build up is the key to messy, awesome sex. Don't go from 0 to 100 unless she deliberately says she wants to get fucked then and there.

fistfulofmetal · « **Reply #10819 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:36:35 PM »

Honestly there's a chance that you won't even cum at all if you bang. Don't worry about it. Does the chick know you're a v?

Atramental · « **Reply #10820 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:39:35 PM »

Quote from: fistfulofmetal on December 18, 2016, 09:36:35 PM

Honestly there's a chance that you won't even cum at all if you bang. Don't worry about it. Does the chick know you're a v?

Nope.

Himu · « **Reply #10821 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:40:22 PM »

You should tell her.

Atramental · « **Reply #10822 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:41:31 PM »

Quote from: Queen of Ice on December 18, 2016, 09:40:22 PM

You should tell her.

Because?

fistfulofmetal · « **Reply #10823 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:47:26 PM »

Being honest is a pretty cool thing. Also if you have trouble performing you have a reason. She won't think you're not into her. Don't girls may be into the idea of teaching you things.

Himu · « **Reply #10824 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:47:29 PM »

If you cum too quick she'll have questions. You will be hiding it. If you say you've had sex before and you cum in ten seconds after sticking it in she'll be like

and you'll be suspect.

But if you tell her you're a virgin, she might want to make it extra special for you and help guide you.

Hiding that you're a virgin is not a valuable asset in the least. It's not even that important besides among high schoolers and college kids. What if you end up really liking her and you two try it hit it off and start dating? You will have went into the relationship with a lie off the bat.

There's also the benefit that admitting your virginity will be a sign of courage to her. She will respect you more - if she has a good head on her shoulders - if you admit your virginity than if you lie. If she gives you shit for being a virgin then she's not much worth anyways and isn't worth pursuing. Win-win.

fistfulofmetal · « **Reply #10825 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:51:53 PM »

Just be honest you fucking pussy.

Atramental · « **Reply #10826 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:53:33 PM »

I have been practicing with my flesh light tho.

Himu · « **Reply #10827 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:58:23 PM »

Being a virgin is nothing to be ashamed of. Just tell her.

Tasty · « **Reply #10828 on:** December 18, 2016, 09:59:48 PM »

Something to be more wary of (IMO) is not being able to finish. I was nervous my first few times and I just couldn't do it due to feeling uncomfortable and nervous.

Atramental · « **Reply #10829 on:** December 18, 2016, 10:04:50 PM »

Fuuuuck...

Atramental · « **Reply #10830 on:** December 18, 2016, 10:20:23 PM »

What are some tale-tell signs someone is a virgin when they're fucking? I'll just do the exact opposite.

fistfulofmetal · « **Reply #10831 on:** December 18, 2016, 10:25:04 PM »

I told the girl I first slept with on our seond date when she was over my place. I don't remember the exact context though. But I knew it was gonna be a bit awkward so I just used that.

First times are awkward. You're not going to be able to prevent that. And if she isn't a v herself she'll know. Don't try to hide shit. Own it and make it work for you.

Atramental · « **Reply #10832 on:** December 18, 2016, 10:29:34 PM »

Fine. I'll tell her.

I hope this doesn't fucking backfire on me and I have to wait until next year to get my dick wet. $:-\$

Himu · « **Reply #10833 on:** December 18, 2016, 10:38:54 PM »

If she turns you down cuz you're a virgin she's not shit anyway and you dodged a bullet. Being in a rush to lose your virginity won't help matters. Where'd you meet her tindr?

Atramental · « **Reply #10834 on:** December 18, 2016, 10:40:17 PM »

Yep. Tinder.

She has already said that she really likes being around me and that I'm super nice.

Himu · « **Reply #10835 on:** December 18, 2016, 10:43:28 PM »

That's good.

Don't hold your v card too tight to your chest. If you just wanted to get laid you could have just ordered yourself an escort. I thought you were in this to date? If a woman turns you down because of your virginity she's not shit. Repeat after me. Your loss of virginity is not worth more than your self respect.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #10836 on:** December 18, 2016, 10:48:07 PM »

Given your porn habits you might end up lasting. Not everyone busts early during their first time. Your hand is tighter than her vajeen. Make sure you worship her body before sticking it in though. You might feel uncomfortable. I won't give you a list but just don't go for the boobs or pussy first. Surprise her, maybe kiss her neck first or something. Then move down to the boobs.

Himu · « **Reply #10837 on:** December 19, 2016, 02:47:04 AM »

That's a pretty simplistic approach no? I thought his goal was to date? Who said anything about get married? Plus, if he admits he's a virgin, she'll be far more understanding and be more willing to have sex on more occasions if it goes right. If he doesn't say he's a virgin and he has trouble performing, she might throw him into the bushes. This means less sex. Again, if he just wanted to get laid he could have just hired an escort.

What IS your goal, Pallando? To date or to get laid or both?

FreeNudeLyleLanley · « **Reply #10838 on:** December 19, 2016, 04:46:08 AM »

I wouldn't worry too much about letting her know you're a virgin, that can be a lot of pressure to put on someone who was just looking to hook up with a tinder date.

seagrams hotsauce · « **Reply #10839 on:** December 19, 2016, 05:45:07 AM »

^Let the man get his dick wet and stop being a crab in a bucket, ho

I'm with Wrath on this one. The whole point of this mission has been "get Pallando laid," not "get Pallando a girlfriend." If she's putting out signals that she's DTF I doubt she's expecting a relationship, so it's not like she's being misled. If you want to mention it, cool, if not, don't sweat it.

Atramental · « **Reply #10840 on:** December 19, 2016, 08:53:08 AM »

Quote from: Dufus on December 19, 2016, 05:37:39 AM

I still think it's kinda weird for panaldo to get a girlfriend without having friends. It'll be too weird and probably not a good idea. It's the reason I don't search for a girl. I want friends before I have a girlfriend, even tho I'm thirsty as fuck.

I have friends now.

Atramental · « **Reply #10841 on:** December 19, 2016, 09:47:08 AM »

*shrug*

Well, that girl I'm going to bone Friday even said that she would like to be my friend even if this whole thing doesn't work out. Her words, not mine.

She likes that I'm very easygoing and non-judgemental (on the surface at least

).

Rufus · « **Reply #10842 on:** December 19, 2016, 09:58:41 AM »

Could be with benefits. Hope dies last.

Atramental · « **Reply #10843 on:** December 19, 2016, 10:00:29 AM »

Quote from: Dufus on December 19, 2016, 09:57:27 AM

Quote from: Pallando on December 19, 2016, 09:47:08 AM
she would like to be my friend even if this whole thing doesn't work out. Her words, not mine.

(Image removed from quote.)

So... it looks like I'm going to be the undisputed winner of the Virgin Wars this year.

Himu · « **Reply #10844 on:** December 19, 2016, 10:00:55 AM »

So are you in this to get sex experience or dating experience or both?

chronovore · « **Reply #10845 on:** December 19, 2016, 10:01:23 AM »

Quote from: Pallando on December 19, 2016, 09:47:08 AM

*shrug*

Well, that girl I'm going to bone Friday even said that she would like to be my friend even if this whole thing doesn't work out. Her words, not mine.

She likes that I'm very easygoing and non-judgemental (on the surface at least ).

It's a good thing other people can't see how we treat ourselves.

Atramental · « **Reply #10846 on:** December 19, 2016, 10:05:41 AM »

Quote from: Queen of Ice on December 19, 2016, 10:00:55 AM

So are you in this to get sex experience or dating experience or both?

I'd like to keep things open because I do legitimately like this girl. So, sex primarily but having both would be nice.

edit: also, after some more pondering, I've decided I'm not going to tell this girl I'm a virgin unless she blatantly asks me about it. Telling her right before we have sex would throw off my mojo big time. If she mentions anything about me being a bit awkward I'll just say "it's been a while".

Samson Manhug · « **Reply #10847 on:** December 19, 2016, 10:21:30 AM »

There's a difference between withholding the truth and flat out lying. "It's been a while" is the second one. I'm not saying tell her because it's Tinder—they don't even know your last name. But don't be a liar (to anyone, right?)

Olivia Wilde Homo · « **Reply #10848 on:** December 19, 2016, 10:21:56 AM »

I absolutely would not listen to a thing Ruzbeh says. There is a reason why he gets ridiculed and burned off of every board he posts in. He thinks he's found someone as low as him on the social totem pole and is jealous and mad that someone is making strides in their social life. Sad!

demi · « **Reply #10849 on:** December 19, 2016, 10:22:58 AM »

Pretend she's the next door neighbor and she needs her PC fixed. Then go from there

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #10850 on:** December 19, 2016, 10:25:41 AM »

No don't call Geek Squad for her, Pall. He means bang her.

Atramental · « **Reply #10851 on:** December 19, 2016, 10:47:47 AM »

MTW is not trolling, though. He just straight up ethered you.

demi · « **Reply #10852 on:** December 19, 2016, 10:53:31 AM »

We did the same naming and shaming with fistful and he came back like "yo sex is pretty awesome" and now look at him.

Wasting his life away with his significant other having adorable co-op lets plays of Gears of War

demi · « **Reply #10853 on:** December 19, 2016, 10:55:07 AM »

Can you imagine playing Gears of War with your chubby latina ~~girlfriend~~ fuck buddy?

fistfulofmetal · « **Reply #10854 on:** December 19, 2016, 11:12:53 AM »

Quote from: Pallando on December 19, 2016, 10:05:41 AM

edit: also, after some more pondering, I've decided I'm not going to tell this girl I'm a virgin unless she blatantly asks me about it. Telling her right before we have sex would throw off my mojo big time. If she mentions anything about me being a bit awkward I'll just say "it's been a while".

Dude, come on now. Don't lie about it. If it doesn't come up then fine, keep it to yourself. But if it outright comes up, be honest about it.

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #10855 on:** December 19, 2016, 11:22:11 AM »

Whatever you do, don't tell her you're a virgin and fuck this up. Also, don't not tell her that you're a virgin and fuck this up.

demi · « **Reply #10856 on:** December 19, 2016, 11:23:17 AM »

I'd totally tell her. Letting a chubby latina have her way with you and teach you things

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #10857 on:** December 19, 2016, 11:27:55 AM »

Quote from: Samson Manhug on December 19, 2016, 10:21:30 AM

There's a difference between withholding the truth and flat out lying. "It's been a while" is the second one. I'm not saying tell her because it's Tinder—they don't even know your last name. But don't be a liar (to anyone, right?)

Technically wouldn't "it's been awhile since I was inside some pussy" be an accurate statement for Pallando?

Atramental · « **Reply #10858 on:** December 19, 2016, 12:24:45 PM »

When the time comes... I'll say what needs to be said. I'll leave it at that.

Olivia Wilde Homo · « **Reply #10859 on:** December 19, 2016, 12:29:01 PM »

I'm of the opinion that you don't need to bring it up unless she asks. The first time is never good but that doesn't mean you will be a premature ejaculator or are unable to get it up. Even if your stroke game is weak, there are people who have fucked hundreds of times and are still bad at it. Also sex will never be great off the bat until you each know what the other likes.

I also advocate fingering her to get off and when in doubt, she can get on top. Easy for a beginner to get a girl off.

News:

Author Topic: Pallando will return in "Never Say Never Again" (Read 1233909 times)