I wanted to put together brief descriptions of the OLD LADY GANG that I have to deal with on the train, in case they do me in:
Pusher Prune-Face: This is the wrinkled 60-something who pushed me and got all bothered that I called her 'fucking rude' back at the beginning of the year. Haven't seen her in a while but I believe she is lurking in the shadows. Last time I ran into her, we got on the elevator at the same time and she tried to make nice. Fuck off.
The Bookworm: No real beef here, just mildly-annoying. Will always try to stand next to me, on either side, at the station when going home. Even when there's already people next to me, she will try to squeeze in. Is always holding a book up in her face and not paying attention to anything. I believe she stands next to me because she knows I have picked "the spot" where the train car with the least passengers will stop every day. Will follow my movements. One time a train going to the other station showed up early and I started walking onto it before realizing it was the wrong one. So did she, only she didn't pay attention and was off on a nice 30+ minute detour.
The Romanian Rotund: No idea what Eastern-European country she is from, but she will usually angrily waddle on over to whatever side The Bookworm is not standing on and attempt to cut in front of everyone, but fails miserably every time.
The Gabber: Incredibly extroverted woman who will start taking to anyone in her vicinity and invade their personal space. Used to try to stand in front of me with her friend but quit doing that after I would move in front of them when the train came. Has come up to me and stared at my phone screen, asking what I'm looking at (who does this?) and last week got entirely too close to me, to bitch and complain about how the machine ate her $20 and that she had to go to another station to get a refund.
Jean The Jacket: My new 'nemesis.' Always stands to the left of me at the station in the morning and will purposefully try to cut in front of everyone to get on first. Will also attempt to "race" me to the platform if she sees me when I come off the elevator (Note- I don't give a shit). I normally wouldn't even pay this person any attention, but she wears the same clothing every day -an outdated denim jacket and some kind of unflattering exercise pants that go just past the knee- and stands out because of it. Will also get on the train and attempt to take up two seats with her stuff. The kicker? She gets off two stops later. She is on the train for maybe five minutes. If I got off there, I wouldn't even bother sitting down.
