Author Topic: eating butthole for the first time need advice (Read 53489 times)

blame space · « **on:** March 22, 2012, 12:42:14 AM »

are "pre-game" moist wipes fair game? i do not want to be rude. i just want to lick in and around an asshole to the best of my ability.

Shadow Mod · « **Reply #1 on:** March 22, 2012, 12:43:37 AM »

Wait you can marquee on the bore?

omg fuck yes

blame space · « **Reply #2 on:** March 22, 2012, 12:44:47 AM »

i just want it to be more

than

.

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #3 on:** March 22, 2012, 12:45:33 AM »

hahaha "hold it babe, gettin some wipes. stay sexy"

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #4 on:** March 22, 2012, 12:46:10 AM »

go in there with a lobster bib

blame space · « **Reply #5 on:** March 22, 2012, 12:47:12 AM »

the wipes would be in a predetermined neutral zone i.e. not the bathroom.. in the same drawer as i keep the condoms. what i want to know is whether or not it's insulting to bust one out before i eat the ass.

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #6 on:** March 22, 2012, 12:48:38 AM »

You could just have sex in the shower

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #7 on:** March 22, 2012, 12:51:21 AM »

Hide a wipe in your mouth, position it over your tongue for the first lick, spit it under the bed real cool like.

blame space · « **Reply #8 on:** March 22, 2012, 12:51:25 AM »

someone correct me here, but is the tongue supposed to enter the butthole? AFAIK the butthole does not have a clitoris or glans to focus on

Bebpo · « **Reply #9 on:** March 22, 2012, 12:54:37 AM »

Quote from: MrAngryFace on March 22, 2012, 12:48:38 AM

You could just have sex in the shower

But then you could slip and break your back and you'd have to tell your grandkids you were crippled eating butt.

blame space · « **Reply #10 on:** March 22, 2012, 12:55:50 AM »

yeah i don't really want to get into it, but the logistics of eating ass in my shower just don't work out.

Dickie Dee · « **Reply #11 on:** March 22, 2012, 12:59:14 AM »

Do it with jelly or syrup, I prefer syrup.

Smooth Groove · « **Reply #12 on:** March 22, 2012, 12:59:55 AM »

Stick in a finger first to see if there's any brown. I haven't done it before but that seems obvious. Also, insist that she shave all hairs if she hasn't already.

The Sceneman · « **Reply #13 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:01:30 AM »

Quote from: MrAngryFace on March 22, 2012, 12:46:10 AM

go in there with a lobster bib

anyway if you are going to give your special someone a rimjob I find it helps to get pretty drunk beforehand

The Sceneman · « **Reply #14 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:03:34 AM »

nvm tmi

Robo · « **Reply #15 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:12:56 AM »

Clearly you came to the right place to ask this question.

blame space · « **Reply #16 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:13:03 AM »

uncalled for. you've never heard my voice nor is "oral diarrhea" even the preferred phrasing of your clever insult. So start talking asshole or leave.

blame space · « **Reply #17 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:14:22 AM »

now I can't stop thinking about "oral diarrhea"

Momo · « **Reply #18 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:15:21 AM »

Some sort of mints would be handy to keep around just in case.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #19 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:18:59 AM »

Quote from: Momo on March 22, 2012, 01:15:21 AM

Some sort of mints would be handy to keep around just in case.

Yeah, try shoving them in the asshole in question, then shake them for like a minute. Problem solved.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #20 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:27:59 AM »

I dunno, wouldn't you need like an enema bag to reliably get listerine in someone's asshole? A funnel at the very least.

Himu · « **Reply #21 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:28:25 AM »

So you're keen on trying chitlins, eh?

blame space · « **Reply #22 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:31:44 AM »

listen i don't want to get into weird butthole stuff, i just want to pleasure my partner.

Himu · « **Reply #23 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:32:19 AM »

Turkey basters are a good multi-use tool. You could use it like a dildo after the rim job too.

Himu · « **Reply #24 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:33:00 AM »

Quote from: blame space on March 22, 2012, 01:31:44 AM

listen i don't want to get into weird butthole stuff, i just want to pleasure my partner.

wait until tomorrow for a serious reply from mupepe

blame space · « **Reply #25 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:33:35 AM »

i'm not prepared to baste anything in my bedroom.

Himu · « **Reply #26 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:35:08 AM »

Quote from: blame space on March 22, 2012, 01:33:35 AM

i'm not prepared to baste anything in my bedroom.

don't do it in the kitchen, that's how you get ants.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #27 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:35:13 AM »

What kind of wine does with that, Billy?

blame space · « **Reply #28 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:36:17 AM »

Thank You Baste God

Momo · « **Reply #29 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:40:11 AM »

Suddenly im reminded I used to sit next to a kid that ate paste in woodshop

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #30 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:42:31 AM »

Quote from: blame space on March 22, 2012, 01:31:44 AM

listen i don't want to get into weird butthole stuff, i just want to pleasure my partner.

Quote of the night

Shadow Mod · « **Reply #31 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:50:42 AM »

Use wetnaps if you can't make your partner shower first. Problem solved.

Momo · « **Reply #32 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:53:21 AM »

Quote from: Billy Rygar on March 22, 2012, 01:42:08 AM

No one is surprised buttholes remind you of sticky white fluid.

Damn straight

Himu · « **Reply #33 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:56:59 AM »

Quote from: Billy Rygar on March 22, 2012, 01:43:06 AM

Quote from: MrAngryFace on March 22, 2012, 01:42:31 AM
Quote from: blame space on March 22, 2012, 01:31:44 AM
listen i don't want to get into weird butthole stuff, i just want to pleasure my partner.

Quote of the night
newsfeed.

.

Timedog · « **Reply #34 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:59:31 AM »

Wait, is this the forum where I can make the threads the GAF would never allow?

edit: is Count Drugula the Australian electronic musician SPOD?

Himu · « **Reply #35 on:** March 22, 2012, 02:13:30 AM »

count dragula is wrath2x

and yes, you can post threads gaf would never allow

blame space · « **Reply #36 on:** March 22, 2012, 02:32:07 AM »

Way to sell out, stringer bell.

Enl · « **Reply #37 on:** March 22, 2012, 03:30:05 AM »

Smear it with chocolate and dive on in.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #38 on:** March 22, 2012, 03:50:07 AM »

Fuck wipes, I'm not touching it unless I spray some Fabreeze in it

Boogie · « **Reply #39 on:** March 22, 2012, 08:55:29 AM »

Quote from: timedog on March 22, 2012, 01:59:31 AM

Wait, is this the forum where I can make the threads the GAF would never allow?

For you? No.

BlueTsunami · « **Reply #40 on:** March 22, 2012, 08:58:51 AM »

Pre-rim the butthole with juicy apple chapstick

Reb · « **Reply #41 on:** March 22, 2012, 09:12:48 AM »

don't fight it; just rim the corn

Eel O'Brian · « **Reply #42 on:** March 22, 2012, 09:43:20 AM »

don't chew

bud · « **Reply #43 on:** March 22, 2012, 10:26:20 AM »

guys, how do you go down on a girl?

Mupepe · « **Reply #44 on:** March 22, 2012, 10:32:36 AM »

Quote from: blame space on March 22, 2012, 12:51:25 AM

someone correct me here, but is the tongue supposed to enter the butthole? AFAIK the butthole does not have a clitoris or glans to focus on

If you go looking for gold, you'll probably find it. Keep that in mind.

Owl-faced Wizard · « **Reply #45 on:** March 22, 2012, 10:34:40 AM »

Wear a condom on your tongue.

Brehvolution · « **Reply #46 on:** March 22, 2012, 10:58:52 AM »

If you want a test drive without the fecal matter, put your tongue on a 9 volt battery.

bork · « **Reply #47 on:** March 22, 2012, 11:02:08 AM »

Quote from: Mamacint on March 22, 2012, 12:59:14 AM

Do it with jelly or syrup, I prefer syrup.

MyNameIsMethodis · « **Reply #48 on:** March 22, 2012, 11:19:28 AM »

Stick ur dick in first so that when u eat ull have a familiar taste

Steve Youngblood · « **Reply #49 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:01:57 PM »

Based on the title, I thought this was going to be another Taco Bell thread.

BlueTsunami · « **Reply #50 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:02:26 PM »

If her butthole puckers and spasms, bail out

Shaka Khan · « **Reply #51 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:04:59 PM »

Quote from: Spencer on March 22, 2012, 10:55:14 AM

Yeah, just remember its a rimjob, stay outta the danger zone.

I went a couple of times into the danger zone. It wasn't bad, then again it was clean.

demi · « **Reply #52 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:13:47 PM »

You're not really supposed to dive right in. Just tease it.

Mupepe · « **Reply #53 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:17:08 PM »

Quote from: Shaka Khan on March 22, 2012, 01:04:59 PM

Quote from: Spencer on March 22, 2012, 10:55:14 AM
Yeah, just remember its a rimjob, stay outta the danger zone.

I went a couple of times into the danger zone. It wasn't bad, then again it was clean.

There's nothing wrong with it in most cases. But it's like going to Mexico and being surprised when you see a Mexican. What the hell did you expect sticking your tongue in there?

Robo · « **Reply #54 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:18:58 PM »

Quote from: Steve Youngblood on March 22, 2012, 01:01:57 PM

Based on the title, I thought this was going to be another Taco Bell thread.

Same advice both ways: wash it down with a cup of Baja Blast.

Shaka Khan · « **Reply #55 on:** March 22, 2012, 01:39:41 PM »

Quote from: demi on March 22, 2012, 01:13:47 PM

You're not really supposed to dive right in. Just tease it.

That's usually what goes down 90% of the time... But there are times when you just want to tongue-fuck.

It curiosity man, I've stuck my tongue in(to) more hazardous places (power sockets, freezers, coal, etc).

Bebpo · « **Reply #56 on:** March 22, 2012, 02:31:32 PM »

This thread kind of makes me want to throw up

I am not good with grosssssness

Hell I don't even like the whole naked aspect of sex, because sweat + skin smells gross, especially when you add in juices

But then, I am OCD about cleanliness.

BlueTsunami · « **Reply #57 on:** March 22, 2012, 02:36:05 PM »

Bebpo fucks through the boxer dickhole confirmed

Bebpo · « **Reply #58 on:** March 22, 2012, 02:40:30 PM »

No, I get naked like everyone else. I just don't enjoy it very much. I find the actual act of sex pretty gross. But I like the passion and emotion side.

That's why I probably wouldn't enjoy a hooker.

Bebpo · « **Reply #59 on:** March 22, 2012, 02:48:39 PM »

Ok, that came across wrong. *I* have no problems with being naked. And I am naked quite often in my home of homes. I just dislike the smells that accompany being with another person naked in the act of sex because they are kind of gross body smells.

News:

Author Topic: eating butthole for the first time need advice (Read 53489 times)