Random talk thread: It just keeps happening

[recursivelyenumerable]

oh. my. god. I just thought of the most awesome research program. this will keep me busy for the next few decades or so ... 

[Brehvolution]

Please say it's about a new way to find the other sock.

[BlueTsunami]

oh. my. god. I just thought of the most awesome research program. this will keep me busy for the next few decades or so ... 

Yeah, "research program", we know what you mean recursive...

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...and it can't be done!

[Himu]

ugh this topic is really useful

http://ehealthforum.com/health/topic38173.html

[Himu]

Uh, now? I find some guys attractive but most of them are assholes so I could never see myself having a relationship with one unless he's awesome. I mostly shoot for women for this reason. 99% attraction to women. 1% attraction to men.

Anyways, seriously. This is the pits. I think it may be the medicine I'm on since I'm an every other day poop cycle person and I've been taking ear infection medicine AND bp medicine in the past week. So that's probably a contributing factor me being shitless.

I mean, today I ate a big bowl of FIBER ONE, ate two apples, and fucking BEANS and all I still don't have the urge to poop. I managed to squeeze one out and it was solid, but it was twisted. The rest were small chunks. And they were green too.

UGH. NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF A GREAT POOPY. DRINKY YOU WERE RIGHT, I'M SORRY FOR DOUBTING YOU

[Himu]

That's too much.

[Himu]

I'm definitely thinking it's my meds. I'm not bloated, I'm not hurting or anything. I just can't poop! 

[BlueTsunami]

And you only eat once a day? The fuck mang, you're bootyhole is a mystery.

[Himu]

Who cares about Wrath. He can poop! I can't! *cries*

[Himu]

Tomorrow is the day!

I've got some brand new Eight O Clock coffee beans here. I'm going to grind them up tomorrow and make a nice hot cup!

Then I'll eat an apple!

For lunch I'll make green beans and broccoli!

For dinner...more beans more beans more beans and roasted chicken!

I'm averaging 5 glasses of water these days. Tomorrow I will bump it up to 6-7.

I AM GOING TO TAKE A CRAP GODDAMIT.

[Groogrux]

I don't think pooping every other day is healthy either.  I think most MD's want you to go at least once or twice a day.

You could try a mild laxative, but I think that takes away too much control.  I personally (and seriously) recommend doing a self enema with warm water.  Should do the trick.  You can buy the kits at drugstores, or if you're shy you could buy a turkey bastor!  

You might want to see your doc about your new meds though and see if he'll change 'em up.

[Himu]

I don't think pooping every other day is healthy either.  I think most MD's want you to go at least once or twice a day.

You could try a mild laxative, but I think that takes away too much control.  I personally (and seriously) recommend doing a self enema with warm water.  Should do the trick.  You can buy the kits at drugstores, or if you're shy you could buy a turkey bastor!  

You might want to see your doc about your new meds though and see if he'll change 'em up.

Most md's want you to go once or twice a day? That's gotta be bs, right? I've read it varies. Not all people are the same. I usually go once every other day, but sometimes it's every day. It's usually not a problem for me.

[Himu]

And honestly, the whole "I go more than once a day" thing frightens me. Even as a kid I never pooped more than once a day. Thinking such a thing just sounds totally crazy to me.

I had a laxative today, but I don't think I had enough.

[Groogrux]

Most md's want you to go once or twice a day? I think that's bs. I've read it varies. Not all people are the same.

All of them that I work with do.  We get people in the ER every other day complaining that they can't poop.  Aside from the fact that this is not an emergency, the doctors still tell them they should be mindful of their diets if they're not going at least once a day.

I think I watched an episode of Dr. Oz that said the same thing, and I'm pretty sure he has a medical staff that he consults with before putting that info out.

[Himu]

Eh. It varies for me. I'm not going to say once every other day is a rule of thumb when it comes to me.

[Phoenix Dark]

Do you drink a lot of Mountain Dew?

[Himu]

I don't drink soda.

[BlueTsunami]

I've known about this statue since I was a kid and its always been something kids and others laughed at and now I'm posting it here for all of you to see...

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Worcester, Massachusetts. Claims to fame, 10 Colleges in the city itself, other things I can't be bothered to wiki and turtle bestiality

[Positive Touch]

himu just take some fuckin laxatives & stay home.  it works for me every time i get backed up.  trust me, it's MUCH better than just trying to go yourself -  i once went for like five days with being backed up and i didn't use any "assisstance."  my shit was seriously the same size & shape as a baseball, and just about as hard.  all i could do was scream for like five minutes after i forced it out and it took another ten before i could get up off the floor.  NEVER EVER GET TO THIS POINT

[Madrun Badrun]

oh. my. god. I just thought of the most awesome research program. this will keep me busy for the next few decades or so ... 

what is it is?

[muckhole]

I've known about this statue since I was a kid and its always been something kids and others laughed at and now I'm posting it here for all of you to see...

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Worcester, Massachusetts. Claims to fame, 10 Colleges in the city itself, other things I can't be bothered to wiki and turtle bestiality

 

That's also the happiest turtle I've ever seen, sculpted or otherwise.

[drew]

he seems terrified more than anything

[Himu]

himu just take some fuckin laxatives & stay home.  it works for me every time i get backed up.  trust me, it's MUCH better than just trying to go yourself -  i once went for like five days with being backed up and i didn't use any "assisstance."  my shit was seriously the same size & shape as a baseball, and just about as hard.  all i could do was scream for like five minutes after i forced it out and it took another ten before i could get up off the floor.  NEVER EVER GET TO THIS POINT

How's taking three laxatives at once?

[Madrun Badrun]

[Himu]

Yay. I finally did it. I got a job as video editor and storyboarder at a place in Orlando. Pay is decent. I'm going to try to work there until I get enough to go to graduate school. I'd like to aim for University of South California's film program. They actually seem to give a shit about their student's work progress. But it's a 3 year program. 

[Madrun Badrun]

I read the first sentence and thought you'd finally pooped, but your post turned out to be better than that.  Congrats. 

[Eric P]

i read that as "snowboarder" and was really confused

[Mupepe]

I really wish people would stop stealing my garbage while I'm standing right on the porch.

why do you care?  it's like recycling!

[Boogie]

I shit like three times a day.

That's too much.

Most md's want you to go once or twice a day? That's gotta be bs, right? I've read it varies. Not all people are the same. I usually go once every other day, but sometimes it's every day. It's usually not a problem for me.

And honestly, the whole "I go more than once a day" thing frightens me. Even as a kid I never pooped more than once a day. Thinking such a thing just sounds totally crazy to me.

I can't believe that I'm seriously about to wade into the subject of how often one should shit... 

oh well.

I think it's not too arrogant to say that I'm one of the healthiest and most fit members on the forum, and I defecate pretty much three times a day without fail.

Hell, at the training academy, our lifestyles, diet, and activities were so uniform that everyone was so regular that within 10-15 minutes of eating lunch, half of the troop wound up squatting in the row of toilets in the washroom.  We called it the "firing line."

I feel dirty for sharing that. 

[Madrun Badrun]

Pigs shit a lot.  What's new.

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I feel bad calling you a pig now 

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[Boogie]

Pigs shit a lot.  What's new.

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I feel bad calling you a pig now 

[close]

It's okay.  I lol'd.

[Boogie]

I can't believe that I'm seriously about to wade into the subject of how often one should shit... 

oh well.

I think it's not too arrogant to say that I'm one of the healthiest and most fit members on the forum, and I defecate pretty much three times a day without fail.

Hell, at the training academy, our lifestyles, diet, and activities were so uniform that everyone was so regular that within 10-15 minutes of eating lunch, half of the troop wound up squatting in the row of toilets in the washroom.  We called it the "firing line."

I feel dirty for sharing that. 

You hear that Himu?

correlation does not equal causation.

or...something.

[CajoleJuice]

I probably average about twice a day. And I'm in OK shape, I guess.

[Diunx]

I just took my third shit of the day.

[Cormacaroni]

who the fuck cares how often he shits, it's not like it's going to stay in there. This is like a pregnant woman being worried about never actually giving birth.

IT ALL COMES OUT EVENTUALLY. IT'S JUST THAT SOMETIMES A NICE MAN HAS TO CUT YOU OPEN.

[Himu]

I took like some magnesium sulfate laxative salt. Supposed to help me with the shits. We'll see how it goes!

[BlueTsunami]

One of these weeks, Himu's bootyhole is release so much poo' he'll have to flush midway into a single sitting. Its gonna feel like the holy ghost is rushin' out ya' ass.

[Himu]

Will you live stream your bathroom antics?

EDIT: Jesus christ the nerds who moved next door are annoying, yelling about smurfs and hyperdrive and shit.

Ask them if they got any weed.

[Himu]

One of these weeks, Himu's bootyhole is release so much poo' he'll have to flush midway into a single sitting. Its gonna feel like the holy ghost is rushin' out ya' ass.

I have actually been envisioning me having an actually good poop and then angels singing praises to the lord and I burst out in a HALLELUJAH choir style.

fake edit: oh shit, i think i feel something coming. Is this it?!?!

[Boogie]

I did earlier, they said something like "Oh noooooo we don't do no sticky icky *insert awkward geek laughter with snorts and all*". I backed the fuck away.

Do you ask everyone you meet if they have any weed?

[Cormacaroni]

Will you live stream your bathroom antics?

EDIT: Jesus christ the nerds who moved next door are annoying, yelling about smurfs and hyperdrive and shit.

Ask them if they got any weed.

I did earlier, they said something like "Oh noooooo we don't do no sticky icky *insert awkward geek laughter with snorts and all*". I backed the fuck away.

Shouldn't have cut your hair. Now you look like a narc.

[Himu]

False alarm: just gas.

Will you live stream your bathroom antics?

EDIT: Jesus christ the nerds who moved next door are annoying, yelling about smurfs and hyperdrive and shit.

Ask them if they got any weed.

I did earlier, they said something like "Oh noooooo we don't do no sticky icky *insert awkward geek laughter with snorts and all*". I backed the fuck away.

Sounds about right if they're nerds.

[Madrun Badrun]

grrrrr can't figure out AVL tree deletion.  Where am I segfaulting???

[Don Flamenco]

grrrrr can't figure out AVL tree deletion.  Where am I segfaulting???

over there *points*

[Himu]

UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HORRIBLE DIARRHEA. I'm pretty positive all of this can be blamed on the diuretic I'm taking. It seems to be a common side effect. I should talk to my doc about this.

I don't CARE if it's "tmi". I feel like a shell of a human being. I feel like fucking snail vomit on a rock. I need to talk to my doc about this diuretic.

On top of this, tonight I have randomly woken up feeling HIGH for no reason at all three times. WHAT THE FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

[Olivia Wilde Homo]

I think you're just making shit up now Himuro.

[lennedsay]

Or it's the combination of diuretic, laxatives, whatever else you took to poop, and the freaking out you've been doing about said pooping.

[Phoenix Dark]

Is their blood in your stool when you do poop?

[drew]

if it makes you feel better, i feel worse than you do

[Madrun Badrun]

When Malek doesn't post in here, this thread turns to shit.

[Mupepe]

So I'm trying to go back to school again.  I went to put in for my associates.  I have the classes but never got it.  They tell me now that I have to have my SAT's done.  I started college classes in high school based off my TAS and TAKS scores so I never had to take it.  It's been 6 years since that shit and I'm scared I'm going to do horrible.  I take it Thursday.  Anyone have any good SAT study guides or something online?

[Madrun Badrun]

God I'm happy that they don't do that shit in Canada.  Won't have to worry about something like that until I apply for doctorate schools ...in like half a decade.

[Barry Egan]

yeah applying for university in Canada was piss-easy compared to the U.S. 

[Mupepe]

screw you guys

[drew]

ive been deathly ill since saturday, like, lliterally  (sunday night when i got back from clev land i felt like i was going to have a heart attack for a while) ....

yeah so i havent slept in a day, didnt sleep one night this past weekend, too. and when i woke up i felt like id worked out every muscle known to man for the first time in a damn decade.  havent eaten anything in 2 and a half days except for 2 dixie cups full of peanuts last night and a bowl of crispix for breakfast the same day.   now ive relapsed with stimulants because i have a job interview to go to tonight and i need to shake the  's off, but all that did was drain the water out of my system which makes me crack every joint in my bdy constantly ;which made trying to fall asleep utterly impossible, id just toss and turn not able to get comfortable due to constant cracking of said knuckles

[Mupepe]

you and himu just need to fuck to see who is more miserable

[Barry Egan]

screw you guys

I took a Princeton Review SAT prep course and I found it pretty damn effective even with my complete inability to pay attention.  They have online prep as well but my guess is that they cost some money.  There are alot of free courses out there, like Number 2 but I couldn't tell you if they're any good. 

[Mupepe]

thanks, grandpa. 

The test is thursday so tonight and tomorrow night are going to be rough

[Barry Egan]

you can always retake the test btw.  I went up 60 points my second run.

[drew]

whatd you guys get on your sat s?

dont lie, ill know

i got a 1260