Random talk thread: It just keeps happening

[team filler]

finally looked up seagram's pics and disappointed at the lack of beak 

[Valkyrie]

I stay on my phone reading bore on the toilet that's why I take so long

It isn’t a successful toilet trip unless you’ve got red marks on your knees/thighs.

[agrajag]

I stay on my phone reading bore on the toilet that's why I take so long

It isn’t a successful toilet trip unless you’ve got red marks on your knees/thighs.

I would never even get up if my thighs didn't fall asleep.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

and I don't do courtesy flushes because I don't like having a whirlpool underneath my bare ass 

[close]

[agrajag]

god damn, Denny's breakfast food is disgusting 

[Valkyrie]

I stay on my phone reading bore on the toilet that's why I take so long

It isn’t a successful toilet trip unless you’ve got red marks on your knees/thighs.

I would never even get up if my thighs didn't fall asleep.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

and I don't do courtesy flushes because I don't like having a whirlpool underneath my bare ass 

[close]

That’s why you put some toilet paper in the bowl right before. Shitting 101

[agrajag]

I stay on my phone reading bore on the toilet that's why I take so long

It isn’t a successful toilet trip unless you’ve got red marks on your knees/thighs.

I would never even get up if my thighs didn't fall asleep.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

and I don't do courtesy flushes because I don't like having a whirlpool underneath my bare ass 

[close]

That’s why you put some toilet paper in the bowl right before. Shitting 101

I only do that when I'm not pooping at home. Home splashback does not gross me out as much, but I still don't like the idea of a vortex underneath me, I feel like I might get sucked in. Yes, I have some toilet hang ups.

And please, do not mistake me for one of those hapless Gaffers who do not know how to wipe their butts. I have well-honed techniques for every occasion. 

[agrajag]

Speaking of gaffers who dunno how to wipe.

If you care about direction of wiping, you're doing it wrong.

The butthole is a small area along the crack. You're supposed to wipe that, not the entire fucking ass crack. Therefore direction does not matter.

They probably have hairy arses and liquid diarrhea like TVC so that stuff gets all over their ass hair, therefore they have to wipe all over.

The direction thing is mostly relevant to women, because the concern is dragging shit cooties into their coochies, causing an infection.

[team filler]

beak talk was started by a false flag event. I was lied to goddamnit

[TVC15]

Speaking of gaffers who dunno how to wipe.

If you care about direction of wiping, you're doing it wrong.

The butthole is a small area along the crack. You're supposed to wipe that, not the entire fucking ass crack. Therefore direction does not matter.

They probably have hairy arses and liquid diarrhea like TVC so that stuff gets all over their ass hair, therefore they have to wipe all over.

The direction thing is mostly relevant to women, because the concern is dragging shit cooties into their coochies, causing an infection.

STFU. I have a baby’s asshole. Perfectly smooth.

[CatsCatsCats]

I stay on my phone reading bore on the toilet that's why I take so long

It isn’t a successful toilet trip unless you’ve got red marks on your knees/thighs.

My right elbow leaves a telling dent in the toilet paper roll

[Great Rumbler]

I need to get through at least 5 pages of my book or the trip to the bathroom isn't even worth the effort.

[agrajag]

Speaking of gaffers who dunno how to wipe.

If you care about direction of wiping, you're doing it wrong.

The butthole is a small area along the crack. You're supposed to wipe that, not the entire fucking ass crack. Therefore direction does not matter.

They probably have hairy arses and liquid diarrhea like TVC so that stuff gets all over their ass hair, therefore they have to wipe all over.

The direction thing is mostly relevant to women, because the concern is dragging shit cooties into their coochies, causing an infection.

STFU. I have a baby’s asshole. Perfectly smooth.

I was referencing the split pea soup that comes shooting out of your cock receptacle

[TVC15]

Speaking of gaffers who dunno how to wipe.

If you care about direction of wiping, you're doing it wrong.

The butthole is a small area along the crack. You're supposed to wipe that, not the entire fucking ass crack. Therefore direction does not matter.

They probably have hairy arses and liquid diarrhea like TVC so that stuff gets all over their ass hair, therefore they have to wipe all over.

The direction thing is mostly relevant to women, because the concern is dragging shit cooties into their coochies, causing an infection.

STFU. I have a baby’s asshole. Perfectly smooth.

I was referencing the split pea soup that comes shooting out of your cock receptacle

If it were split pea soup, I’d have tubing connecting my asshole to my mouth. I love split pea soup.

[TVC15]

Also, you’ll all be happy to know I’ve been (barely) holding in a massive dump for like two and a half hours because I’m nauseous and I’m gonna puke when the shit hits the water and the smell hits my nose. I generally like throwing up, but not in these circumstances. Throwing up on a pile of disgusting shit is only sexy if I’m watching someone else do it.

[agrajag]

Speaking of gaffers who dunno how to wipe.

If you care about direction of wiping, you're doing it wrong.

The butthole is a small area along the crack. You're supposed to wipe that, not the entire fucking ass crack. Therefore direction does not matter.

They probably have hairy arses and liquid diarrhea like TVC so that stuff gets all over their ass hair, therefore they have to wipe all over.

The direction thing is mostly relevant to women, because the concern is dragging shit cooties into their coochies, causing an infection.

STFU. I have a baby’s asshole. Perfectly smooth.

I was referencing the split pea soup that comes shooting out of your cock receptacle

If it were split pea soup, I’d have tubing connecting my asshole to my mouth. I love split pea soup.

it is quite good, especially if it's made with ham hocks

[TVC15]

Did the deed. Wasn’t as bad as I expected. All solid. It was pretty complete. Nothing showed up when I wiped.

Anyway, reading up on Lil Tay. never heard of her before, but she’s making me want to have kids just so I could exploit them into being social media stars. I could never be a social media whore myself (too shy), but I’d have no problem social media pimping out my young daughter. I’d be really shameless. It would border on child abuse.

[Madrun Badrun]

I've taken up wood carving as a hobby.  I suck but it relaxing.

https://imgur.com/a/IVG6DQS

[TVC15]

I don’t think you suck. Looks good to me!

[agrajag]

that's pretty cool, dude

[Valkyrie]

I've taken up wood carving as a hobby.  I suck but it relaxing.

https://imgur.com/a/IVG6DQS

Wow, I really wanna try this. Also you’re doing pretty good!

[team filler]

carve a dildo and go fuck yourself

[TVC15]

carve a dildo and go fuck yourself

Be nice to Dandy. He has a good soul.

[team filler]

I was talking to butt

[team filler]

I can tell you how I feel about you night and day

[Valkyrie]

carve a dildo and go fuck yourself

Wood screw

[CatsCatsCats]

I can tell you how I feel about you night and day

Certified jam
https://m.

[Rufus]

I've developed a taste for bitter orange marmalade. Gonna have to try Marmite next, I suppose.

[Raist]

carve a dildo and go fuck yourself

Pretty sure that's exactly what he carved?

[Raist]

Gonna have to try Marmite next, I suppose.

Just. Do. Not.

Like, seriously.

You've been warned.

[TVC15]

What should I do tonight?

1.pantsless Forensic Files while I read about terrible crimes.
2. Pantsless God of War while watching Forensic files

[team filler]

http://www.thebore.com/forum/index.php?topic=44500.msg2192786#msg2192786

[I'm a Puppy!]

Kind of took part in an mmf threesome. That was interesting.

Two questions:
"Kind of"

Also MMF or MFM?

[seagrams hotsauce]

beak talk was started by a false flag event. I was lied to goddamnit

listen to distinguished mentally-challenged fellows, brehs

[toku]

Always knew my dad was a gambler but i found out this week that mahjong was apparently his thing which colors the two times he actually took me out to eat as a kid as both times we went to asian spots  Also apparently the summer I spent with him at his girlfriends, it was close by to one of his private games 

[BlueTsunami]

The floating YT vid while browsing the internet is a game changer. Just upgraded to Oreo and I'm herr typing this shit out while Big Jay Oakerson is saying some funny shit to the upper left. Fucking picture in picture is back my niccas

[Olivia Wilde Homo]

Had a random thought on the toilet today.

What if pooping is so satisfying because it massages your prostate? What if this also why men spend more time in the bathroom than women?

Nah, it feels good for women too. That's why I looked it up, and found out it's because of a nerve.

Also, unless you spend 15 minutes pushing, it isn't relevant how long you stay in the bathroom just because you're taking a shit.

wtf girls don’t poop u liar

[team filler]

I've been posting on internet messageboards for almost 20 years now 

[team filler]

[Madrun Badrun]

Tried a redo to get the eyes right.  Better but they are still pretty poor. 

https://imgur.com/a/udqACwD

[chronovore]

Tried a redo to get the eyes right.  Better but they are still pretty poor. 

https://imgur.com/a/udqACwD

Dude. Those are both impressive.

[Nintex]

I nearly died today.

I crossed the road in a designated 'this is the place you should cross the road' spot with signs and everything.
I checked to see if nothing was coming from the left or the right. I notice this bus miles away, thinking he has plenty of room to brake.
Halfway down the road I'm thinking: "Why ain't I hearing bus brakes?" turns out the bus decided not to brake but instead run over me at full speed.

Just as the bus is about to hit my face (I could see the giant window in the corner of my eye), I do a running jump towards the sidewalk.

That road is cursed. A year back someone decided to ram my car from the left on a crossing just a few meters ahead of today's adventure.
Years back I nearly got run over by a truck who lost control and made a swing to the left.

Thankfully the Terminators still have not succeeded in their mission.

[Raist]

Well shit guys, we're gonna have to come up with something else. Again.

[CatsCatsCats]

Kind of? Spill.

Jack, you’ve left us wanting

[etiolate]

I'm abnormally happy that I found a tiki hawaiin shirt in a discount store for $2. It's got a Tiki on the front and a giant tiki on the back.

I can finally fit in at bowling alley bars.

[eleuin]

if you beat off with baby lotion does that make you a pedophile

[etiolate]

.

[CatsCatsCats]

Bro I’m just tryna enjoy my morning coffee, can you at least keep that shit to pertinent threads or maybe just fuck off. Have you no reverence for the dead?

I’m just tryna read about a devil’s threesome and you’re spamming dead children. Get a grip.

[agrajag]

in lighter news...

instead of practicing guitar ive been figuring out the past few days at what height i want my guitar at

cuz having it low looks cool but is difficult to play, having it high makes it easier to play and similar to sitting down, but might look less cool

but i almost got it figured out

basically unless it's really high, it will look cool, and having it lower has diminishing returns in terms of coolness

my feeling is it's better to have it somewhat high, and if you're gonna go for the cool factor, seems to me at a certain point its more about how you conduct yourself, how you move around, rather than just guitar height alone

it seems kinda dumb to worry about this to the degree that it preoccupies me that i barely have time to practice but im still glad cuz now i got it figured out

and now... im ready to rock!

What kind of music are you trying to play? Unless you're trying to be John Petrucci there's no reason you can't pull off whatever you're trying to do in style instead of looking like a nerd with the geetar way up high

[agrajag]

my strap on the highest setting doesn't even set the guitar that high, so it barely matters

im a beginner so i dont play anything advanced... but still, i feel comfort matters more, and unless it's really high, it'll look cool anyway

If you're a beginner, play mostly sitting down and practice your chops. If you know how to play, making the adjustment to standing up and playing with some flair will be a piece of cake.

[agrajag]

eh ok

but i imagine if i ever play... its not gonna be sitting down so i figure i should practice mostly standing

with acoustic i dont think i care... so sitting is fine

in fact standing with acoustic looks kinda dumb now that i think about it

Hey man, practice however you like, as long as you're having fun that's the most important part

[agrajag]

I think if you are practicing with a band or practicing for a performance you should play under the same conditions you would live. If you're just trying to git gud, you should do it when you are most comfortable.

[agrajag]

Nice rebranding Stosta, I see you! 

But what did you do to TVC?
 

[Atramental]

Bought two powerball tickets.

Here’s hoping I can take a break from my job after tonigh...

[Atramental]

Something else I've been thinking about...

I probably should just start working part-time since full-time is fucking killing me.

I don't know how well that would fly though. I looked at the average part-time salary for a graphic designer in the US and... I'm basically making that much now (minus $7K) as a full-time designer. 

[team filler]

https://twitter.com/AdamStites_/status/997871369466429440

[Atramental]

Have you thought about moving? Go just a few hours north to New York and you'll make way more money.

The cost of living alone wouldn’t make it worth my while.

Also, I’m an okay designer not a great designer that could end up at a design firm like Pentagram and make a large salary.

Tbh, I’m just going to keep on hoping I get a lucky break eventually because I fucking hate working for other people (that I don’t really have a choice to work with or not). I rather just make my own shit and if people like it? Cool. If not? Fuck off and go find some hack designer/artist that just rips shit off from behance, vectorstock, or creative market.

[team filler]

(((wrath))) is a lil ass soyboi snitchy ass bitch 

[seagrams hotsauce]

he's sad etoilet got btfo

[team filler]

[Atramental]

Goddamn it. Can’t sleep...

Might as well get showered and dressed for work since I wasn’t able to finish all the stuff I had to do Friday and Thursday.

Getting fired would be a mercy for me at this point.