Author Topic: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care  (Read 530577 times)

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Atramental

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4260 on: December 17, 2018, 06:47:07 PM »
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I'm a Puppy!

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4261 on: December 17, 2018, 06:49:05 PM »
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Days off until they actually let you go I guess?
DOCUMENT EVERYTHING you might need it for unemployment. So note down "conversation on date at time with person y was asked to resign. At z time door was locked..." etc.
que

Atramental

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4262 on: December 17, 2018, 06:52:46 PM »
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Madrun Badrun

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4263 on: December 17, 2018, 06:53:34 PM »
Look up wire tap laws in your state if you do that.

CatsCatsCats

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4264 on: December 17, 2018, 06:57:02 PM »
Quick google says he’s got one party consent in his state and should be gravy

Yeti

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4265 on: December 17, 2018, 09:37:52 PM »
WDW

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4266 on: December 19, 2018, 08:04:26 PM »
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wtf, that is so fucked mayn

hope shit's working out ok
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shosta

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4267 on: December 20, 2018, 11:51:43 PM »
Stage IV penile cancer
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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4268 on: December 21, 2018, 02:19:32 AM »
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Love this

Fucking scum employers

Bebpo

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4269 on: December 30, 2018, 02:26:27 PM »
This is a cross-over from depression/relationship/inconveniences, but I feel it fits more here.

I've been thinking lately during my depression about how a lot of my life has been stagnant, waiting for my next relationship to make certain changes. While I've changed and grown in terms of socializing, friends, better mental & physical health, travels, at the same time,

I still live in the same place I lived 8 years ok when I first got my job, I still drive the same car from 8 years ago, I still have the same 1080p tv from 8 years ago, my condo's interior decorations haven't really changed from 8 years ago outside some stuff I built with exes that I never bothered to get rid of. The only thing I've really added in the last 8 years was getting a Vinyl player & speaker setup last year and a Projector setup for hosting last year and an Espresso machine like 2 years ago. Otherwise my place is pretty much the same as when I moved in 8 years ago. I travel a lot less than I should because everytime I want to travel I think I'd rather do this with a gf and I should wait until I'm in a relationship to do this trip (also because I fucking hate flying and find it way more relaxing with someone else). My computer's about 3-4 years old now, same with most of my tech outside my phone that I've had to update because they die after 2-3 years each time (damn you apple).

The jist of it is that sometimes I feel like I'm still living the life I was when I first started working 8 years ago, and I'm kinda stuck in the past.

Like most of that is really tied to this idea that I'm waiting to get married before changing those things. Like I could sell my place and buy a house but it just feels like it'd be lonely to live alone in a house (even more so than a condo) and plus if I'm going to get married in the next few years I'd like my SO's input on choosing the right house for us. Plus that whole 2nd income from a partner would be nice too for buying a house. And I don't feel like upgrading my TV until I get a new house because the hassle of moving out old stuff. Same reason I still have all this old junk from past exs. It's like when I buy a new place I'll get rid of all the junk I don't need, keep what I do and buy a bunch of new shit like tv/furniture/decorations. Car is more just that my car still runs and I can't justify buying a new car and everything looks ugly to me. And yeah if I was in a relationship/married I'd be on the flight like every month or two seeing a lot more places I want to see.

So meanwhile since I'm not getting in relationships and therefore not getting married, nothing is happening on those fronts and meanwhile I'm just getting older and closer to death (I feel so old at 37 now, like most of my life is over :\).

I'm thinking this year, even if I don't get in a relationship (because goddamn I am bad at this), I should sell my place and move and decorate the place out and get a new tv and just bring some change in my life so at least it feels new and not that I'm just sitting stagnant waiting to die. I should travel more as well. I'm thinking maybe Savannah in March, Scotland again in Summer, Japan in fall, Montreal/Quebec in fall ideally with maybe some drives to Arizona/Colorado because I've never been.

I'm also starting to think about changing jobs because I don't love my job and it's stressful and I'm sure it's shortening my lifespan. Since I live pretty frugally outside trips I've got a good savings and if I wanted to I could change to a lower paying career that's actually fun and positive and makes me happy and could coast at my current style of living. Also if I did married to someone with a decent job as well that'd make it even easier to do that. Or I could stick with my job and keep saving up to do something at some point idk. I'd like to bankroll an indie game studio (very small size, like 3-4 people) and try to make a successful indie game and transition to that full time, but it's pretty risky (I'm estimating probably $300-400k for a 1-2 year project with ~4 employees) and it's tough to breakout among the hundreds of indie games released and make $$$. I wonder if you can find investors for things like that to take some of the risk off. But first I gotta figure out some good game ideas and write out a game design book for them. Right now it's all kinda pie in the sky. I don't hate my current job but I'm not adding anything positive to the world and it's extremely stressful. idk

shosta

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4270 on: December 30, 2018, 02:29:15 PM »
Do you have any siblings?
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Bebpo

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4271 on: December 30, 2018, 02:33:38 PM »
Yeah, a younger one and they're on their 2nd house and about to get married, dogs, new cars, 4k tv and all that. Just makes me feel even more stagnant at my stage of my life. I feel like I'm living like a guy in his late 20s, not late 30s.

TVC15

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4272 on: December 30, 2018, 03:11:17 PM »
Sorry you feel bad, beb.

Anyway, I had a dream I pissed myself and I had to wake up to make sure I didn't really piss myself. I'm about 80% sure I'm clean. I was at the White House and I got chased by Secret Service after I refused to hug Trump and called him a motherfucker.
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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4273 on: December 30, 2018, 03:44:11 PM »
This is a cross-over from depression/relationship/inconveniences, but I feel it fits more here.

I've been thinking lately during my depression about how a lot of my life has been stagnant, waiting for my next relationship to make certain changes. While I've changed and grown in terms of socializing, friends, better mental & physical health, travels, at the same time,

I still live in the same place I lived 8 years ok when I first got my job, I still drive the same car from 8 years ago, I still have the same 1080p tv from 8 years ago, my condo's interior decorations haven't really changed from 8 years ago outside some stuff I built with exes that I never bothered to get rid of. The only thing I've really added in the last 8 years was getting a Vinyl player & speaker setup last year and a Projector setup for hosting last year and an Espresso machine like 2 years ago. Otherwise my place is pretty much the same as when I moved in 8 years ago. I travel a lot less than I should because everytime I want to travel I think I'd rather do this with a gf and I should wait until I'm in a relationship to do this trip (also because I fucking hate flying and find it way more relaxing with someone else). My computer's about 3-4 years old now, same with most of my tech outside my phone that I've had to update because they die after 2-3 years each time (damn you apple).

The jist of it is that sometimes I feel like I'm still living the life I was when I first started working 8 years ago, and I'm kinda stuck in the past.

Like most of that is really tied to this idea that I'm waiting to get married before changing those things. Like I could sell my place and buy a house but it just feels like it'd be lonely to live alone in a house (even more so than a condo) and plus if I'm going to get married in the next few years I'd like my SO's input on choosing the right house for us. Plus that whole 2nd income from a partner would be nice too for buying a house. And I don't feel like upgrading my TV until I get a new house because the hassle of moving out old stuff. Same reason I still have all this old junk from past exs. It's like when I buy a new place I'll get rid of all the junk I don't need, keep what I do and buy a bunch of new shit like tv/furniture/decorations. Car is more just that my car still runs and I can't justify buying a new car and everything looks ugly to me. And yeah if I was in a relationship/married I'd be on the flight like every month or two seeing a lot more places I want to see.

So meanwhile since I'm not getting in relationships and therefore not getting married, nothing is happening on those fronts and meanwhile I'm just getting older and closer to death (I feel so old at 37 now, like most of my life is over :\).

I'm thinking this year, even if I don't get in a relationship (because goddamn I am bad at this), I should sell my place and move and decorate the place out and get a new tv and just bring some change in my life so at least it feels new and not that I'm just sitting stagnant waiting to die. I should travel more as well. I'm thinking maybe Savannah in March, Scotland again in Summer, Japan in fall, Montreal/Quebec in fall ideally with maybe some drives to Arizona/Colorado because I've never been.

I'm also starting to think about changing jobs because I don't love my job and it's stressful and I'm sure it's shortening my lifespan. Since I live pretty frugally outside trips I've got a good savings and if I wanted to I could change to a lower paying career that's actually fun and positive and makes me happy and could coast at my current style of living. Also if I did married to someone with a decent job as well that'd make it even easier to do that. Or I could stick with my job and keep saving up to do something at some point idk. I'd like to bankroll an indie game studio (very small size, like 3-4 people) and try to make a successful indie game and transition to that full time, but it's pretty risky (I'm estimating probably $300-400k for a 1-2 year project with ~4 employees) and it's tough to breakout among the hundreds of indie games released and make $$$. I wonder if you can find investors for things like that to take some of the risk off. But first I gotta figure out some good game ideas and write out a game design book for them. Right now it's all kinda pie in the sky. I don't hate my current job but I'm not adding anything positive to the world and it's extremely stressful. idk

It seems like you need a new relationship more than anything.

Change is good, but am not sure how changing up tech is going to make you feel any better when it's just stuff at the end of the day.  If your TV is working fine...wait for it to die before replacing it unless you want 4K for better gaming or whatever.  Ditto with the car, although if your S2000 is still in good shape, you can probably get a good amount for it.  My dad finally got rid of his last year and said that the guys at the dealership were salivating over it when he traded it in.  Still, if a 'facelift' is what your place needs...go for it.   

Dunno about the job thing, or rather it sounds like you'd be leaving a stressful, albeit well-paying job for something that is going to be just as stressful or worse and could end up costing you a lot of money.   

Have you also thought about moving to another city, state, or country for a while or even permanently?

Also, this-
Quote
Car is more just that my car still runs and I can't justify buying a new car and everything looks ugly to me.

 :lol Is pretty much what I kept thinking when I had to get another car after mine was totaled recently.  Either ugly...or everything looks like same.  Like every car out there is either a Honda Fit clone, samey-looking crossover, or samey-looking SUV or pick-up.  Nobody wants anything different anymore- it's so boring.  Reminds me of smartphones. 
« Last Edit: December 30, 2018, 04:17:36 PM by bork »
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shosta

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4274 on: December 30, 2018, 03:46:39 PM »
Yeah, a younger one and they're on their 2nd house and about to get married, dogs, new cars, 4k tv and all that. Just makes me feel even more stagnant at my stage of my life. I feel like I'm living like a guy in his late 20s, not late 30s.
I would recommend not quitting your lucrative career. Make as much money as possible and pass it on to your younger brother's kids.
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shosta

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4275 on: December 30, 2018, 03:59:32 PM »
He could steal his skin and impersonate his brother. Then he'd steal more than just his stuff, he'd steal his whole life.

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Bebpo

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4276 on: December 31, 2018, 12:39:00 PM »
It seems like you need a new relationship more than anything.

Change is good, but am not sure how changing up tech is going to make you feel any better when it's just stuff at the end of the day.  If your TV is working fine...wait for it to die before replacing it unless you want 4K for better gaming or whatever.  Ditto with the car, although if your S2000 is still in good shape, you can probably get a good amount for it.  My dad finally got rid of his last year and said that the guys at the dealership were salivating over it when he traded it in.  Still, if a 'facelift' is what your place needs...go for it.   

Dunno about the job thing, or rather it sounds like you'd be leaving a stressful, albeit well-paying job for something that is going to be just as stressful or worse and could end up costing you a lot of money.   

Have you also thought about moving to another city, state, or country for a while or even permanently?

Also, this-

Yeah, I'd love to move to another city/state/country and get a fresh start. I feel like especially with dating/relationships that it would work wonders since I've generally dated the dating pool in my city.

The problem is US Healthcare yay. I'm on a grandfathered healthcare plan from pre-Obamacare and if I leave the state or mess up anything I can lose it and then I'll be fucked/dead because America's healthcare and my monthly meds are like $15k without insurance. Also since I run my own business I don't get benefits and great healthcare plans and stuff. So I'm pretty much stuck as a resident of California for the rest of my life unless healthcare is fixed in the USA at some point (maybe it will be? who knows).

And while I can move within CA, outside LA and surroundings where I'm at there's really just San Diego and San Francisco. SF is way too fucking expensive for me. Maybe the SF from 20 years ago I'd move to because I do like cities and public transportation. And San Diego is...boring? Like I see SD as LA but way less interesting and mostly just rich white people on boats zzz, we have enough of that here in OC already.

Good suggestion though, just wish it was more doable. I've thought about working/living somewhere else and just coming back to CA every month for a weekend to keep my residency and get my meds but obviously that would be complicated. Still potentially doable.

Quote
Car is more just that my car still runs and I can't justify buying a new car and everything looks ugly to me.

 :lol Is pretty much what I kept thinking when I had to get another car after mine was totaled recently.  Either ugly...or everything looks like same.  Like every car out there is either a Honda Fit clone, samey-looking crossover, or samey-looking SUV or pick-up.  Nobody wants anything different anymore- it's so boring.  Reminds me of smartphones.

Hehehe, yep. If I saw a slick looking, runs and handles great, manual shift, electric/hybrid car for like <$40k I'd upgrade and keep my S2000 just as a scenic drives kinda car. But I feel like in the last 10-20 years the car industries taken a cue from the videogame industry and there's like the normal ugly car for $30-40k or the LE edition car that actually looks nice for $70-80k and I ain't paying over $50k for a car in my life unless I win the fucking the lottery. I like cars, but not that much.

nachobro

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4277 on: January 03, 2019, 01:02:08 PM »
Our 18 year old kitty is not doing well. She's had kidney disease for a couple years now and yesterday we found she had an accident and there was blood in her pee. Took her to the vet today and they said it's not an infection, which means its either her kidneys or bladder not working or a tumor...any of those are bad news. So they are running blood work now to see if her kidneys have gotten much worse. If so, this may be the end. My wife has had this cat since she was 8 so this is gonna be tough :(

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4278 on: January 03, 2019, 01:47:37 PM »
oh man, I'm sorry Nacho. That sucks!
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CatsCatsCats

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4279 on: January 03, 2019, 01:55:57 PM »
Sending my love in your trying time, brother

nachobro

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4280 on: January 03, 2019, 03:37:26 PM »
Thanks guys

Got a call from the vet post-bloodwork and it's not looking too great. Her kidney levels are very high but she still overall has a good quality of life. She's eating well, still playing with toys, etc. So we're gonna try putting Spock on a special wet food diet with bladder relief food + CBD and see if she still has issues. If she does, then there's a painkiller we can give her to help her use the box without pain.

What it sounds like the vet was sorta dancing around was that this isn't the end, but it's one step away from the end. Vet is still very impressed with our old gal though. Said she's in surprising shape for an 18 year old cat with kidney issues who refuses to eat any kidney diet food but she can't last forever.

edit: vet confirmed this is basically endstage kidney disease and the painkiller is way too much ($160 a week) for us to afford. Luckily she seems to be eating the new prescription food, it's something to help with bladder/urinary tract and "calms" kitties (looked up the brand and it has tryptophan in it) and now we just give her that with some CBD as her main diet and just wait it out. :(
« Last Edit: January 03, 2019, 06:29:36 PM by nachobro »

brawndolicious

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4281 on: January 03, 2019, 06:35:55 PM »
Yeah you just have to be there for her. I don't know if it matters to you, but you may want to cremate your kitty individually. Usually they do several animals at once but you might want to keep the ashes or do your own ceremony.

nachobro

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4282 on: January 04, 2019, 02:42:06 PM »
thanks, that's good to know. i wasn't aware pets were done together

chronovore

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4283 on: January 08, 2019, 09:26:49 PM »
Sad for you, Nachobro. Losing a kitty is rough.  :'(

Madrun Badrun

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4284 on: January 08, 2019, 10:01:09 PM »
Sorry man

nachobro

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4285 on: January 09, 2019, 12:30:39 AM »
A good update, Spock made a random and drastic improvement out of nowhere pretty much. We had one bad night where she wasn't able to use the box all day and took her to the vet the next day to see if there was any option or if it was the end. Vet gave us a few days supply of the painkiller and we gave it to Spock as she kept having trouble.

Then suddenly last night she was back to normal. No blood in her pee, no trouble going, acting much more perky. Vet is saying her kidney numbers are still at a high level but it seems our girl wasn't giving up yet. Haven't given her the painkiller today but still giving her the special food and she seems to be back to her normal self.

So now she is celebrating her return from the brink by laying out on a heating pad





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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4286 on: January 09, 2019, 02:37:11 AM »
Got to agree here with Bork, Beps.

Shaking things up with moving somewhere new would be more meaningful then replacing things.

I think it has been backed up by studies even that when we move to a new enviroment far away we are in someways reset and we have to reassert ourselves and who we are.

You say there are a lot of problems with this but... Where there is a will there is a way (maybe?). What kknd of meds cost 15k a month??

1080p tv or 4k has almost no impact on your happiness day to day beyond the initial rush of endorphins when you buy it.

shosta

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4287 on: January 09, 2019, 02:55:39 AM »
Edit: who cares
« Last Edit: January 09, 2019, 03:09:10 AM by shosta »
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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4288 on: January 09, 2019, 03:21:10 AM »
Aww come on

chronovore

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4289 on: January 10, 2019, 08:10:42 AM »
Got to agree here with Bork, Beps.

Shaking things up with moving somewhere new would be more meaningful then replacing things.

I think it has been backed up by studies even that when we move to a new enviroment far away we are in someways reset and we have to reassert ourselves and who we are.

You say there are a lot of problems with this but... Where there is a will there is a way (maybe?). What kknd of meds cost 15k a month??

1080p tv or 4k has almost no impact on your happiness day to day beyond the initial rush of endorphins when you buy it.

A friend of mine, in a moment of conciseness, said, "It doesn't matter where you are. It matters /who/ you are."

I'm a Puppy!

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4290 on: January 10, 2019, 11:33:54 AM »
I always say, "You take your problems with you."

Also, great news about the kitty!
que

Joe Molotov

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4291 on: January 10, 2019, 01:13:22 PM »
Some would say it doesn’t matter who you are, where you’re from, or what you did.
©@©™

CatsCatsCats

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4292 on: January 10, 2019, 02:49:27 PM »
Word is on the backstreets that you’re right

Mupepe

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4293 on: January 10, 2019, 02:55:42 PM »
Word on the backstreets is that you're a fucking slut who spreads those cheeks for anything and everything and you wouldn't have it any other way you fucking slut.

CatsCatsCats

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4294 on: January 10, 2019, 03:06:49 PM »
That’s beautiful, thank you for sharing your affirmations with us

Himu

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4295 on: January 10, 2019, 05:40:39 PM »
This government shutdown is impacting my fucking money!!!!
IYKYK

Bebpo

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4296 on: January 10, 2019, 06:21:26 PM »
Got to agree here with Bork, Beps.

Shaking things up with moving somewhere new would be more meaningful then replacing things.

I think it has been backed up by studies even that when we move to a new enviroment far away we are in someways reset and we have to reassert ourselves and who we are.

You say there are a lot of problems with this but... Where there is a will there is a way (maybe?). What kknd of meds cost 15k a month??

1080p tv or 4k has almost no impact on your happiness day to day beyond the initial rush of endorphins when you buy it.

America, land of the great!

Just got a notice from my insurance that they declined the anesthesiologist bill of $1,200 from my colonoscopy last month because anesthesia during a procedure is for the patient's benefit and not surgically required. Yay, there goes probably another $500 in bills.

shosta

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4297 on: January 10, 2019, 06:23:15 PM »
Quote
anesthesia during a procedure is for the patient's benefit and not surgically required
right, why couldn't you just drink a fifth and bite into a block of birch wood like your forefathers did
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Bebpo

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4298 on: January 11, 2019, 11:45:13 PM »
So I'd been in a real bad depression lately. Like not day to day down and depressed but like everytime I'm not occupied by something I'm often thinking of death, the death of everyone on earth and eventually the universe, and the death of everyone I know and love, the meaning of life, feeling like wasting life playing videogames and hanging out with people as days go by. Like at 20s death felt so far away, but late 30s not so much. Hard to sleep at night, just feeling anxious about it all.

Then got better in the last day or so.
How?

I stopped listening to depressing af indie music singing about growing old and dying all the time and started listening to weaboo Japanese shit again which is all positive and happy and gives me feels. Maybe anime is good for life?

 :uguu

BIONIC

  • Virgo. Live Music. The Office. Tacos. Fur mom. True crime junkie. INTJ.
  • Senior Member
Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4299 on: January 12, 2019, 04:06:56 AM »
Anime is always fun and games.

Just watch Devilman Crybaby for an extra dose of positivity and love of life  :D
Margs

Mr Gilhaney

  • Gay and suicidal
  • Senior Member
Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4300 on: January 20, 2019, 09:56:32 AM »


i was a bit too optimistic, when the question came to fitting in through two big rocks  :beli

chronovore

  • relapsed dev
  • Senior Member
Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4301 on: January 21, 2019, 11:11:25 PM »
I was working in Tokyo on Friday when I got a desperate call from my wife, asking me to come down for the weekend. Her father seemed to be dying. We have been dealing with this off-and-on since 2001, so it wasn’t anything new to hear. Then I got a second call from my daughter, who said I needed to come home immediately.

I took a bullet train to Osaka, and was still an hour out when he passed away.

My wife’s father‘s poor health is literally the reason we move to Japan in 2001. Somehow he beat the odds for 18 years. We buried my own father, a surprise death, while we were over here waiting for her father to die. My father-in-law attended many of his friends’ funerals, consistently beating the odds.

Some of you already know that I tried to move back to California in 2012, found a fantastic job at a great company, being paid more money than I ever expected to get paid in my life, and then had to give it up because my wife felt unable to move away from her father in his frail state.  I love my career, but I will always put family first. In this case it put a huge goddamn dent in my earnings, career path, and more. In the end, my in-laws tell me that it was my willingness to move back that extended my father-in-law‘s wife an extra six years.

We spent the entire weekend dealing with the funeral. Japan has several stages to a funeral, and the first three of them took place on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday nights. He had been a politician who had received an award from the Emperor himself, and many people owed him sizable favors.  Even people who had not been true to what they owed him showed up; some stayed and shed tears, others paid their respects and fled. In all there were well over 1000 attendees. I owed him more than anyone else: I stole his daughter.

I find myself here at the beginning of 2019, now 17 1/2 years after moving back, wondering what to do next.  For 1/3 of my life, the lion share of my adult career, so much centered around his existence that I am now missing an anchor, and find myself adrift.
« Last Edit: January 23, 2019, 02:58:10 AM by chronovore »

toku

  • 𝕩𝕩𝕩
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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4302 on: January 22, 2019, 12:28:12 AM »
condolences chrono, I hope you have somone close to lean on/talk to too rn

El Babua

  • Senior Member
Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4303 on: January 22, 2019, 12:43:19 AM »
Sorry for your loss Chrono :(

brawndolicious

  • Nylonhilist
  • Senior Member
Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4304 on: January 22, 2019, 02:33:23 AM »
You'll be okay. The hard part is figuring out how to take care of your family after one of your parents passes away but just be open and don't feel rushed.

CatsCatsCats

  • 🤷‍♀️
  • Senior Member
Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4305 on: January 22, 2019, 12:44:29 PM »
Sending love to you and yours, papa Chrono

nachobro

  • Live Más
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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4306 on: January 22, 2019, 12:55:48 PM »
We're putting down Spock today. Her upswing only lasted a few days before she started sliding downhill again. We've been giving her that painkiller and it's been helping but it's becoming noticable that she's losing weight and is very lethargic. She's been eating less and less and yesterday she didn't take but two bites of food all day and last night she just cried for a few hours even with the painkiller and wasn't able to use the box all day.

I'm gonna stop by the vet at lunch to get a stronger painkiller to give her to keep her calm today and a second dose to give her before we head to the vet so she doesn't get upset on the trip. Even though she isn't eating and barely staying awake she still lifts her head up when she hears the treat bag so we'll take some with us to give her at least something nice before the end.

Our two cats don't normally get along at all but Rona has been very sweet to Spock throughout all of this and last night after Spock was finally able to calm down and sleep, Rona curled up around her to keep Spock company and hasn't left her side since then. So that's at least one nice thing to see out of this.

CatsCatsCats

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4307 on: January 22, 2019, 12:56:57 PM »
😿sorry nacho

I'm a Puppy!

  • Knows the muffin man.
  • Senior Member
Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4308 on: January 22, 2019, 01:51:46 PM »
Chrono, first off, I'm sorry for your loss. And I know the sacrifice that you made will always sting. But that being said, this is a major accomplishment

In the end, my in-laws tell me that it was my willingness to move back that extended my father-in-law‘s wife an extra six years.


Most people will live their whole life and never be able to give this to someone else. You should be immensely proud.
Cold Comfort, I know. But it's comfort nonetheless
que

Mr Gilhaney

  • Gay and suicidal
  • Senior Member
Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4309 on: January 22, 2019, 01:55:08 PM »
That sucks man. But you are doing the right thing putting the cat down.

shosta

  • Y = λ𝑓. (λ𝑥. 𝑓 (𝑥 𝑥)) (λ𝑥. 𝑓 (𝑥 𝑥))
  • Senior Member
Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4310 on: January 22, 2019, 01:55:51 PM »
Chrono, it's time to enter Japanese politics.
每天生气

I'm a Puppy!

  • Knows the muffin man.
  • Senior Member
Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4311 on: January 22, 2019, 01:58:01 PM »
Sorry about Spock Nacho. I had to put our cat down a few months ago. I feel you.
que

skullstorm

  • Member
Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4312 on: January 22, 2019, 02:02:14 PM »
Sorry Nacho and Chrono  :(

nachobro

  • Live Más
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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4313 on: January 22, 2019, 03:19:17 PM »
Goddamn when it rains it pours

Got in a car accident on the freeway on the way to the vet to pick up the last painkillers. My lane had what looked like a bunch of clothes in it plus a highway dept truck partially in the lane so I throw on my signal to get over and slow down a bit to go behind the line of cars that (of course) aren't letting me in. Suddenly, smacked right in the rear by a red car. We both pull over and luckily my Scion just has a cracked bumper and no other damage. Other dude not so lucky but he wanted to get insurance involved even though the guy driving the highway truck said it was all on him and told the cops that too. I've got a bit of back tightness but I guess it could have been worse.

The more depressing bit was after I got the meds and gave them to Spock. Normally she'll get some water after this painkiller (probably tastes awful) but she was trying so hard to stand to get to her dish and her back legs weren't doing anything so I had to bring the dish to her on the bed. I damn near broke down right then.

Sorry to rant but fuck today in every direction, goddamnit

zomgee

  • We've *all*
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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4314 on: January 22, 2019, 03:26:32 PM »
Big hugs nacho. So sorry.

Sorry - same to you chrono.
« Last Edit: January 23, 2019, 09:16:58 AM by zomgee »
rub

Rufus

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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4315 on: January 22, 2019, 03:30:46 PM »
 :-\

Valkyrie

  • Good Christian
  • Senior Member
Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4316 on: January 22, 2019, 07:50:02 PM »
Hugs for Chrono and Nacho.

G The Resurrected

  • Senior Member
Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4317 on: January 22, 2019, 08:39:18 PM »
I'm sorry to hear about Spock Nacho. It's hard letting go of a loved one, especially a pet who has become family.

Chrono I am sorry for your loss, I hope that you find strength in your family and become the anchor they need going forward. If the ship needs a new heading think of it as a new opportunity at adventure in life.


Madrun Badrun

  • twin-anused mascot
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Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4318 on: January 22, 2019, 08:51:29 PM »
Sorry guys

chronovore

  • relapsed dev
  • Senior Member
Re: Struggle Thread mk II - No one likes us, we don't care
« Reply #4319 on: January 23, 2019, 02:49:46 AM »
Chrono, it's time to enter Japanese politics.

Why, do you hate me?