Nintendo Switch Thread

[benjipwns]

xagimaru
9 years ago
ii'm so totally getting this game lol

[benjipwns]

M Anderson
4 years ago
It still pisses me off that they never released this god damn game. I know they released a watered down version instead but that's still not a release.

And High voltage didn't cancel this because there wasn't a market, it was because Nintendo and Sega (guys funding them) went on a full boner rampage about how violent games were bad for gaming...

Nintendo had a market for the so-called "hardcore gamers" they just decided to suffocate it and keep releasing cute Mario games.

[benjipwns]

I think announcements of unaltered ports of Red Steel and a complete QUANTUM 3 ENGINE set including the unfinished games also unchanged would make for an epic next Nintendo Direct.

  The Switch 2019 Lineup

[Tasty]

Didn't The Grinder turn into a 2D game or some shit?

HUGE shades of "Raid Over the River," the upcoming hit Nintendo DS game by "Sadness" Wii developers Nibris.



One of my friends was so hyped for this that the cancellation forever soured her on the Wii.

[Tasty]

Brehs I think I have like 10 years of pent-up Wii frustration over the constant lies and "tests."

spoiler (click to show/hide)

inb4 "see a doctor for that" jokes

[close]

[Tasty]

Wait that The Grinder trailer totally ripped off a cue from Manfredini's Friday the 13th score without earning it whatsoever

My fucking decade-long repressed rage is finally boiling over 

[Tasty]

TBH Capcom gets most of my ire for all the shit they pulled with the Wii, but at least they tossed some bones every now and then.

[Tasty]

What's "interesting" about Nibris is that after all the developers abandoned the company and started a new studio, they actually did start making games. So I don't know what the original problem with Nibris was. Maybe the CEO was a huge asshole and everyone but him moved to the new place?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bloober_Team

[benjipwns]

The 360/PS3 version of The Grinder was going to be a top down shooter.

And one of the reasons was that when you're playing with a controller it couldn't handle the intensity of their FPS game. You needed the power of the Wii for that.

[BisMarckie]

God, the N64 was such a dumpster fire


Who needs SOTN when you can play Castlevania 64?

[Tasty]

If we pray to Inafune and buy enough copies of Resident Evil 4: Wii Edition and Dead Rising: Chop til You Drop, I'm sure they'll port Resident Evil 5!

And if we buy enough copies of Tatsunoko vs. Capcom maybe they'll port Marvel vs. Capcom 3 too!!

[agrajag]

that game actually looked cool, they should release it on the Switch. Does High Voltage Studios still exist?

[benjipwns]

I still remember all those Sadness threads, when it was obviously live action, yet all these reasons it could potentially be IN ENGINE. Like there was a dude convinced that the reason it was all shown in black and white was to save engine resources and insane stuff like that.

And the debates over what the specs were and how there were secret sauces and crap, I think that's where Emily Rogers first got her start? When somebody had stripped the chip within like a week and said LOOK, IT'S THE GEKKO/FLIPPER WITH MORE RAM ATTACHED. Other than being obviously clocked up a simple multiplier step.

Speaking of Game Informer and Wii pre-release stuff. That Red Steel article has all kinds of false tech info, and they had "confirmed sources" saying the Wii was like a 1.5Ghz multi-core upgrade of the Gekko with some kind of super off the shelf ATI GPU that Nintendo had SECRETLY CUSTOMIZED.

Which, actually now that I think about it, was what the Wii U basically was.

[benjipwns]

that game actually looked cool, they should release it on the Switch. Does High Voltage Studios still exist?

They do PC ports and such, they did the recent Mortal Kombats, Injustice and the Saints Row Re-Elected ports to the Xbone/PS4, THAT SWITCH IS NOT GETTING, BUT INSTEAD GETTING THE THIRD.

High Voltage once did NBA Inside Drive, which arguably had the best AI and player attribute design in any basketball games until recently.

[agrajag]

I remember I used to lurk on IGN Nintendo boards right around the time the Wii came out and a little bit before the launch. There was a subgroup of posters that were convinced that there was some hidden secret extra horsepower hidden underneath the little flap in the front and Nintendo, like a trap card that Nintendo was going to reveal any moment. All that hype was predicated on one single throwaway line by Iwata when he said "the Wii will make you say 'wow.'"

[BisMarckie]

"the Switch will make you say 'wow.'"

[Tasty]

This is a bit of catharsis.

The Sadness version would be 10 seconds. "They contracted out some music and artwork but never wrote a single line of code. The end."

[agrajag]

"the Switch will make you say 'wow.'"

suck my dick and balls, I work for NASA

[Tasty]

If we pray to Inafune and buy enough copies of Resident Evil 4: Wii Edition and Dead Rising: Chop til You Drop, I'm sure they'll port Resident Evil 5!

Speaking of, it's kind of amazing how Capcom is killing it again and a big reason is they're doing the opposite of what Inafune wanted now

"Graphics that will make you say wow" is a classic. Just 

YUP.

I still wish Legends 3 had released, and I'm not even a fan.

Though, it getting cancelled was a huge "I told you so/fuck you" to duckroll who was absolutely insufferable in his insistence they couldn't possibly cancel it. Even though Inafune kept saying "DEMO" "PROTOTYPE" "NOT TECHNICALLY GREENLIT" over and over and the rest of us on GAF were like "uhhhh is this even going to be a thing?"

What doubly sucks though is that they were like, two weeks from releasing the demo? Which would have actually given Capcom the data they needed to make a decision.

Fucking boneheaded 2007-2013 era Capcom.

[BisMarckie]

On topic, how is Overcooked 2 on switch? Was thinking of getting this one but the shitty framerate and input lag the first one had made me skeptical. Everything I have found on reddit via google is from Nintendo fanboys who also said that the first one was the greatest thing since sliced bread.

[agrajag]

If we pray to Inafune and buy enough copies of Resident Evil 4: Wii Edition and Dead Rising: Chop til You Drop, I'm sure they'll port Resident Evil 5!

Speaking of, it's kind of amazing how Capcom is killing it again and a big reason is they're doing the opposite of what Inafune wanted now

"Graphics that will make you say wow" is a classic. Just 

But it just doesn't add up. Why would Iwata say the "graphics will make you say wow" if it's not on par with PS360? Nintendo is holding back a secret, just watch.

[agrajag]

My favorite Nintard moment was one thread where some guy at Nintendo mentioned "Oh yeah Miyamoto used to smoke and play pachinko a lot" in an interview and some were losing it like "oh man miyamoto was a badass" instead of just your general Japanese man without a hint of irony

If you think I'm lying, remember that Reggie's supposed badass persona the permeated with the fanbase stemmed from him daring to say "ass"

https://www.resetera.com/threads/is-reggie-fils-aim%C3%A9-the-goat.59581/

[Tasty]

I remember I used to lurk on IGN Nintendo boards right around the time the Wii came out and a little bit before the launch. There was a subgroup of posters that were convinced that there was some hidden secret extra horsepower hidden underneath the little flap in the front and Nintendo, like a trap card that Nintendo was going to reveal any moment. All that hype was predicated on one single throwaway line by Iwata when he said "the Wii will make you say 'wow.'"

I don't remember the flap + secret horsepower* stuff, but I do remember there being a 6-month period in the Nintenblogosphere (please god never let me type that again) where there was rampant speculation about what WAS under the flap. The theory that convinced the most was that it was either a projector () or some kind of expansion slot like the N64 (with the 64DD) and GameCube (with the GameBoy Player) had.

You have to remember, this was barely weeks after the entire Nintendo fanbase (myself included) got duped by Nintendo ON.



This is still the most popular video I ever uploaded. Across both my YouTube accounts.

* I do remember there being a lot of talk about how devs weren't properly getting all the horsepower from the system because they were using shitty unoptimized cross-platform engines and/or were also "super lazy." Which I mean, you look at Galaxy and then you look at an average third-party game and that's pretty easy to buy (but it ignores sooooo many other factors, obviously.) I also remember talk of the system being able to output 720p somehow since "some games on the PS2 did it" and "component cables sorta support 720i which I guess is close enough?" I don't think there were ever any Wii games above 480p though.

[benjipwns]

Found some hot exclusive details from E3 2005, first the PS3 is only going to cost $350, it's got like a billion ports in the back of it and the Killzone and FF VII footage is LEGIT NEW GAMES. Also the Cell was only operating at 75% power!

The Revolution has two 1.8Ghz Power PC G5 processors, a 600 Mhz ATI chip (more powerful than the 360's) and 384 MB of RAM, with 256 of that being superfast embedded DRAM.

Famitsu asked developers and only 13% plan to make games for the 360, while 39% will be making PS3 games.

Also apparently there's some kind of secret sex mini game in San Andreas, and they might have to cancel GTA altogether.

[Tasty]

The best thing about Reggie is that he burst onto the scene saying "I'm about kicking ASS!" and then less than two years later Nintendo went all blue ocean and Reggie had to dial his schtick back to teddy bear levels ASAP.

[BisMarckie]

"secret sauce" in consoles is always great entertainment. I used to read misterxmedia's shitty blog for the craziest conspiracy theories until you could feel he stopped believing it himself and it somehow became even sadder if such a thing is even possible.

[benjipwns]

I used to make joke posts on here about the WiiU's USB dongle to unlock "secret sauce" in the GPGPU, but that was a real thing the GAF threads were full of.

[agrajag]

I remember the Nintendo ON stuff. The secret horsepower delusion was after the Nintendo ON was revealed to be a hoax. The biggest crusader of the "Wii is secretly powerful" cult was this dude with a Dr Mario avatar. There was also speculation was that the flap has an expansion port for massive power.

[Tasty]

I remember the Nintendo ON stuff. The secret horsepower delusion was after the Nintendo ON was revealed to be a hoax. The biggest crusader of the "Wii is secretly powerful" cult was this dude with a Dr Mario avatar. There was also speculation was that the flap has an expansion port for massive power.

Ah then we're remembering the exact same thing.




Weird how we were all eons apart when this was going down but we ended up meeting here. Must be fate.

[Himu]

Why is this thread so active? Is it the Ntard thread? I’m an Ntard. Can I hang out even though I don’t have a Switch yet?

[Tasty]

I used to make joke posts on here about the WiiU's USB dongle to unlock "secret sauce" in the GPGPU, but that was a real thing the GAF threads were full of.

The Project Cafe speculation era was when I actually looked at the cup of Kool-Aid being handed to me and raised an eyebrow.

[Tasty]

Why is this thread so active? Is it the Ntard thread? I’m an Ntard. Can I hang out even though I don’t have a Switch yet?

We're reminiscing about all the ways Nintendo consoles and third-parties failed us from 1996 to 2017. Feel free to join.

[agrajag]

I remember the Nintendo ON stuff. The secret horsepower delusion was after the Nintendo ON was revealed to be a hoax. The biggest crusader of the "Wii is secretly powerful" cult was this dude with a Dr Mario avatar. There was also speculation was that the flap has an expansion port for massive power.

Ah then we're remembering the exact same thing.




Weird how we were all eons apart when this was going down but we ended up meeting here. Must be fate.

I am a veteran of the N64/PSX wars. When we first got intenent, I used to post on the AOL video game board (they had their own boards and chatrooms for all sorts of topics), that was right at the apex of the N64 vs PS1 wars. Now if any of you guys were on there, I'd really be surprised lol. I even got my dad's account suspended and got grounded over my console warring.

[BisMarckie]

MegaMan in Smash is totally gonna jump start the WiiU's sales

[benjipwns]

We should make past threads of just crappy rumors/speculation so we could do like a 1993 thread and people fight over the CD-i vs. the SNES-CD/Playstation vs. Sega CD vs. Trip Hawkins secret project vs. Atari's SIXTY-FOUR BIT COME BACK, DO THE MATH.

[Tasty]

Remember the Nintendo Revolution controller rumors? All sorts of weird ass fake leaks. My personal favorite was the projector thing that me and my brothers all bought blindly. I remember my cousin calling us on the way back from Riyadh and was like "guys, the Revolution's name was changed to the W.I.I." and us spending the next two and a half hours in the car speculating what that could mean

I had a folder on Windows XP with about 30 of them. The one that stick's in my mind is the on with a purple ball inside an exposed metal cube. Like what the fuck?

[agrajag]

We should make past threads of just crappy rumors/speculation so we could do like a 1993 thread and people fight over the CD-i vs. the SNES-CD/Playstation vs. Sega CD vs. Trip Hawkins secret project vs. Atari's SIXTY-FOUR BIT COME BACK, DO THE MATH.

I don't think Atari or 3D0 really had all that many stans. Even in those day Jaguar was viewed as a joke and 3D0's price tag precluded any but the elitest of the elite even having a chance of playing it.

[Himu]

Why is this thread so active? Is it the Ntard thread? I’m an Ntard. Can I hang out even though I don’t have a Switch yet?

We're reminiscing about all the ways Nintendo consoles and third-parties failed us from 1996 to 2017. Feel free to join.

For me it would be the Wii easily. I full on hype. It was my most anticipated console ever. The premise, new controls, Zelda on day one. It was the first and only system I bought at launch. I camped out in my car on release day play Phoenix Wright on my ds. I thought it had the makings of a great system. I knew it’d sale gangbusters. And what did Nintendo do with all that success? Jack shit.

Utterly baffling system with so much potential only to be left with disappointment. Although I occasionally get nostalgic for Wii (it is still hands down my favorite console design ever in terms of aesthetic) but looking back to that era is mind boggling and the beginning of my descent of going from a die hard game lover to a jaded game hater.

[benjipwns]

You gotta go back before the N64 for Nintendo's first round of real major horseshit. PROJECT REALITY. And then the big displays of KILLER INSTINCT and CRUISIN USA as ACTUAL GAMES YOU WILL PLAY IN YOUR HOME. (The former on your SNES.)

Then it was the Ultra 64, and they delayed it over and over, only for it to come out and there be three games (Mario 64, Pilotwings 64 and Waverace 64) for the first four months or something. And stuff was getting delayed almost constantly. And the 64DD, which you would have to get for Zelda.

Of course SEGA fans were having it even worse. I remember this sad dope at school trying to tell me Gun Griffon was going to be Game of the Century.

[BisMarckie]

[Tasty]

FOUND IT (and a bunch of other total bullshit )

spoiler (click to show/hide)

BONUS ROUND

[close]

Looking this shit up was all I did in Summer 2005. Literally nothing else to do. Well, I also watched the Twilight Princess trailer approximately 1000 times. I remember trying to load GameSpot's shitty RealPlayer version of the trailer so my sister could watch it and be impressed but it kept fucking buffering every 2 seconds, even though it was sub-240p.

Kids today have it too good.

[BisMarckie]

for fuck's sake benji 30 seconds

[Olivia Wilde Homo]

I remember I used to lurk on IGN Nintendo boards right around the time the Wii came out and a little bit before the launch. There was a subgroup of posters that were convinced that there was some hidden secret extra horsepower hidden underneath the little flap in the front and Nintendo, like a trap card that Nintendo was going to reveal any moment. All that hype was predicated on one single throwaway line by Iwata when he said "the Wii will make you say 'wow.'"

This belief was prevalent on NeoGAF too at the time.  Johnny Nighttrain aka Johnny Nightfraud "hinted" that the Wii was on par with PS3 or 360 in terms of power but for ~reasons~, Nintendo decided to not utilize any of it.  However he totally saw some games that looked on par with the 360 and everyone believed him until he kept lying about other things.  Good times.

[Himu]

Virtua Boy was the weirdest thing I’ve ever seen in my career as a game head.

On magazine covers, everywhere. Kid brought one to school for recess. Tons of hype and then....wet fart. Went from hype to 0 in like a month.

[BisMarckie]

I like that one of the fakes is just a negcon with the gamecube face buttons.

btw. the negcon was absolutely terrible and i don't know why i bought one.

[agrajag]

You gotta go back before the N64 for Nintendo's first round of real major horseshit. PROJECT REALITY. And then the big displays of KILLER INSTINCT and CRUISIN USA as ACTUAL GAMES YOU WILL PLAY IN YOUR HOME. (The former on your SNES.)

Then it was the Ultra 64, and they delayed it over and over, only for it to come out and there be three games (Mario 64, Pilotwings 64 and Waverace 64) for the first four months or something. And stuff was getting delayed almost constantly. And the 64DD, which you would have to get for Zelda.

Of course SEGA fans were having it even worse. I remember this sad dope at school trying to tell me Gun Griffon was going to be Game of the Century.

The young me was pissed off that they changed the cool Ultra 64 branding to gay Nintendo 64.

Also, those early screenshots of the Bowser boss battle from Mario 64 and the 10 poly model of Link with a really long nose were always hilariously bad.

Remember the Dream Team?

[Himu]

I unabashedly believed the extra horsepower thing and in hindsight it was just super wishful thinking. Also, thursdayton. Fucking Drinky.

[Himu]

FOUND IT (and a bunch of other total bullshit )

(Image removed from quote.)

(Image removed from quote.)

(Image removed from quote.)

(Image removed from quote.)

(Image removed from quote.)

(Image removed from quote.)

(Image removed from quote.)

(Image removed from quote.)

spoiler (click to show/hide)

BONUS ROUND

[close]

Looking this shit up was all I did in Summer 2005. Literally nothing else to do. Well, I also watched the Twilight Princess trailer approximately 1000 times. I remember trying to load GameSpot's shitty RealPlayer version of the trailer so my sister could watch it and be impressed but it kept fucking buffering every 2 seconds, even though it was sub-240p.

Kids today have it too good.

that fake switch

[benjipwns]

I know it's not Nintendo, but this is EGM's greatest mock up of all time:

[Himu]

Nexus looks like a vacuum

[agrajag]

they teased this game for years on end. Speak about bullshots!

[agrajag]

that EGM Sega CD mock-up looks like a melting Genesis 

[Tasty]

I just realized summer 2005 was half my fucking lifetime ago

The fuck

[agrajag]

[benjipwns]

Remember the Dream Team?

This was one of the best parts, because even at the time, like almost none of those companies were well regarded, many were shovelware kings or arcade port houses. And many of them announced games that never actually came out.

The Dream Team was revealed with a six-page feature in the April 1995 issue of Nintendo Power magazine (Volume 71, page 67), declaring it an “exclusive club” in which “the first games to be released for the Nintendo Ultra 64 will appear only on that platform,” with no “watered-down versions” appearing on other video game platforms. “Nintendo of America has been busy creating exclusive relationships with top publishers and developers so that NU64 buyers will have the best library of games possible. These partners have received early development help from Nintendo and SGI (Silicon Graphics, Inc.) so they could begin work on their games immediately.”

Then there are the exclusive developers: Acclaim, Angel Studios, GameTek, DMA Design, Paradigm, Rare, Sierra Online, Software Creations, Spectrum Holobyte, Williams, and Nintendo once again. After the initial reveal, other companies to sign on as Dream Team members included WMS Industries, Paradigm Simulation, Ocean, Time Warner Interactive, and Mindscape.

[Tasty]

Eternal September applies to gaming as a whole, but Nintendo especially. We look back and laugh at the wacky Revolution concepts but the entire fanbase went through the exact same motions two years ago with the Switch. There were less of them sure, since people try to be more "credible" these days, but it's all the same shit.

[agrajag]

You will not besmirch the name of Spectrum Holobyte!


 

[benjipwns]

(Image removed from quote.)

look at that fucking list under game publishers

STREET FIGHTER III, new Mega Man, new Ghouls and Ghosts, Madden, Dragon Quest 7, Robotech, new Contra game, MONSTER DUNK, ULTRA MARIO KART 2, ULTRA METROID, EarthBound 2, TETRIS 3, The Steampunk, Final Fantasy 8, Secret of Evermore 2, Mortal Kombat 3 ENHANCED

[agrajag]

Eternal September applies to gaming as a whole, but Nintendo especially. We look back and laugh at the wacky Revolution concepts but the entire fanbase went through the exact same motions two years ago with the Switch. There were less of them sure, since people try to be more "credible" these days, but it's all the same shit.

Deep down inside, every Nintard clamors for a super powerful Nintendo system that competes graphically with the latest Sony or Microsoft system.

[BisMarckie]

I vaguly remember reading about Nintendo's cartridges for the N64 that they have developed some super effective compression method that they would have effectively more space than on a CD-Rom.