Elon Bought Twitter- X GON GIVE IT TO YA

[Potato]

Hey tech bros, don't marry hot gold digging sluts that are out of your league. Eventually someone with more cash comes along and you're out of the picture.

*whispers* Sergey has more money than Elon.

It was a "brief" affair, reflecting the period of time that Elon was the richest man in the world.

[Pissy F Benny]

Putting the rat in Muskrat

[Occam]

in case u need to lose a boner fast


https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/1517707521343082496

[Uncle]

that looks like AOC getting up next to him 

[BIONIC]

Please stop body shaming 

[Rufus]

Hey tech bros, don't marry hot gold digging sluts that are out of your league. Eventually someone with more cash comes along and you're out of the picture.

*whispers* Sergey has more money than Elon.

It was a "brief" affair, reflecting the period of time that Elon was the richest man in the world.

Great save, dude.

[Nintex]

https://twitter.com/adamhoov/status/1551951681004269569

 

[who is ted danson?]

https://twitter.com/adamhoov/status/1551951681004269569

 

hey kayne, i'm in bed with ur wife :skete

[zomgee]

i often stand on tables to defend things

[Madrun Badrun]

It's smart to take the high ground. 

[Uncle]

https://www.theverge.com/2022/8/9/23298841/former-twitter-employee-convicted-spying-saudi-arabia

 

[james]

Elon Musk sells 7.92 million Tesla shares worth $6.88 billion

https://www.cnbc.com/2022/08/09/elon-musk-sells-7point92-million-tesla-shares-worth-6point88-billion.html

[james]

Introducing NFT profile pictures
What is an NFT?NFTs (short for Non-Fungible Tokens) are digital items that you own. Proof of ownership is stored on a blockchain, a digital database that is publicly accessible. Learn more
So what does this mean?
NFT profile pictures are displayed in a special hexagonal shape
To choose an NFT as your profile picture you must connect your crypto wallet

The fuck is this

[Pissy F Benny]

lol people still care about this?

[Tasty]

Introducing NFT profile pictures
What is an NFT?NFTs (short for Non-Fungible Tokens) are digital items that you own. Proof of ownership is stored on a blockchain, a digital database that is publicly accessible. Learn more
So what does this mean?
NFT profile pictures are displayed in a special hexagonal shape
To choose an NFT as your profile picture you must connect your crypto wallet

The fuck is this

Twitter attempting relevance.

[Maiden Voyage]

Please stop body shaming 

Nevah

[Kurt Russell]

Elon Musk Changes Course And Proposes Going Through With Twitter Deal At Original Price

https://vigourtimes.com/elon-musk-changes-course-and-proposes-going-through-with-twitter-deal-at-original-price/

[james]

Man got destroyed by the court and the Ukraine simultaneously

 

I can see him simply shutting down the website out of spite

[Phoenix Dark]

I called it. My predictions are always right.

[james]

Big Brain Musk will propose buying it with Russian money and handing it over to his funders so Biden is forced to cancel the deal on security concerns giving Musk an escape hatch

[Nintex]

It's going to be a glorious trainwreck 

[Nintex]

Twitter accepts

https://twitter.com/TwitterIR/status/1577380758192197632

[benjipwns]

The hell is Vigour Times?

[Phoenix Dark]

The hell is Vigour Times?

The official newspaper publication of Jeb Bush.

[HaughtyFrank]

https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/1577428272056389633

 

[Tasty]

Sorry Musk, Google already owns the letter X.

[Phoenix Dark]

Guess a few days of legal discovery were too much for Elon huh. Who could have guessed.

[Uncle]

https://www.nbcnews.com/business/business-news/elon-musk-twitter-acquisition-deal-proposal-rcna50225

Elon Musk tells Twitter he'll go forward with acquisition if lawsuit stops

[Phoenix Dark]

https://twitter.com/Independent/status/1577978410395115521

uh oh

[Madrun Badrun]

[Nintex]

The Elon Musk Twitter-take-over Russian-bot combo is truely incredible

https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/1577839258714476544

[Phoenix Dark]

https://twitter.com/gabrielmalor/status/1578128260453597233

[Nintex]

The deal is expected to close on the 28th

https://twitter.com/chancery_daily/status/1578137982996914177

[Kurt Russell]

Is this also a good place to talk about Kanye?

Kanye West To Acquire 'Uncancelable' Social Media Platform Parler

Kanye West, the rapper who also also goes by the name Ye, has reached an agreement to buy "uncancelable free speech platform" Parler, the two said in a statement Monday, in a move they said will help individuals express their conservative opinions freely. From a report:

As part of the deal, financial terms of which were not disclosed, Parler has agreed to sell fully to West but the social network will continue to receive technical support from Parlement Technologies, including access to its private cloud services and its data center infrastructure. The deal is expected to close in the ongoing quarter. West, who has accused Meta and Twitter of censoring him in recent weeks, said in a statement: "In a world where conservative opinions are considered to be controversial we have to make sure we have the right to freely express ourselves."

https://techcrunch.com/2022/10/17/kanye-west-to-acquire-uncancelable-social-media-platform-parler/

[Pissy F Benny]

does anyone even use parler, i'd have thought the people who would be inclined to have migrated to trump social or whatever the fuck its called.

[Tasty]

Is this also a good place to talk about Kanye?

Kanye West To Acquire 'Uncancelable' Social Media Platform Parler

Kanye West, the rapper who also also goes by the name Ye, has reached an agreement to buy "uncancelable free speech platform" Parler, the two said in a statement Monday, in a move they said will help individuals express their conservative opinions freely. From a report:

As part of the deal, financial terms of which were not disclosed, Parler has agreed to sell fully to West but the social network will continue to receive technical support from Parlement Technologies, including access to its private cloud services and its data center infrastructure. The deal is expected to close in the ongoing quarter. West, who has accused Meta and Twitter of censoring him in recent weeks, said in a statement: "In a world where conservative opinions are considered to be controversial we have to make sure we have the right to freely express ourselves."

https://techcrunch.com/2022/10/17/kanye-west-to-acquire-uncancelable-social-media-platform-parler/

Anyone can start a blog. 🙄 Twitter doesn't owe anyone anything, and people are not owed an audience.

[Phoenix Dark]

So to recap, Kanye has multiple mental breakdowns. Later we learn he's spending a lot of time with Candace Owens and parroting her drivel. In 2018 after Candace lies claiming that Kanye designed a political clothing brand for her, Kanye disavows her and says he's done with politics.
https://slate.com/culture/2018/10/kanye-west-rejects-blexit-candace-owens-claims.html

By the following year he's back to making unhinged political statements and Candace returns. This week he does multiple interviews promoting her George Floyd documentary, in which she apparently claims he didn't die of asphyxia, the cop's knee was not harming Floyd, and maybe that he died of fentanyl instead. Today, Kanye announces he's purchasing Parlor. Who is the CEO of Parlor, you may ask?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

https://twitter.com/jaredlholt/status/1581986849647906817

It's abundantly clear she has been taking advantage of a mentally ill rich idiot for years and this is the big payday.

[BIONIC]

Yass queen. Get that bag gurl 

[Nintex]

Melania queening also

https://twitter.com/drewharwell/status/1581362005793206272

https://twitter.com/NoahShachtman/status/1581798204399841280

[Nintex]

This is the dumbest cinematic universe but a cinematic universe nonetheless
https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/1582098917696901120

https://twitter.com/RealCandaceO/status/1582100702381240320

[Phoenix Dark]

Imagine watching Kanye rant about "Jewish media," accuse people who believe in the development and protection of a Jewish nation of convincing his wife to discuss her sex life on a television show....and saying "yea, this right here? That's what I'm talking about." 

These people are hateful and deranged. The only reason Parlor is back on the app store is because they started moderating content. Does Kanye plan on removing moderation? Speaking of which, does Elon think Kanye's defcon 3 tweet about Jews should have been acceptable, and will that be allowed when (if?) he takes over Twitter?

[Transhuman]

If what Kanye wrote is legally permissible and doesn't break TOS I don't see why it should be removed, even if it's batshit crazy.

[benjipwns]

Today, Kanye announces he's purchasing Parlor. Who is the CEO of Parlor, you may ask?

The only reason Parlor is back on the app store is because they started moderating content.

Is this some kind of joke about how pallor the skin color of people on it are?

[Phoenix Dark]

Today, Kanye announces he's purchasing Parlor. Who is the CEO of Parlor, you may ask?

The only reason Parlor is back on the app store is because they started moderating content.

Is this some kind of joke about how pallor the skin color of people on it are?

No because I don't see color.

[Nintex]

https://twitter.com/exec_sum/status/1583226406430945281

[benjipwns]

He wanted to know how many bots were on Twitter so he could hire them to replace the employees.

 

[Occam]

While Twitter had been planning cuts before the takeover, firing all but 2000 employees is nuts. Additionally, seems like Musk is way overpaying (well, it's probably mostly the banks' money). Kanye West on the other hand presumably isn't paying billions for Parler. Maybe Musk should have gone for that instead.

Musk’s $44 billion bid, though hostile, is a golden ticket for the struggling company — potentially helping its leadership avoid painful announcements that would have demoralized the staff and possibly crippled the service’s ability to combat misinformation, hate speech and spam.

The impact of such layoffs would likely be immediately felt by millions of users, said Edwin Chen, a data scientist formerly in charge of Twitter’s spam and health metrics and now CEO of the content-moderation start-up Surge AI. He said that while he believed Twitter was overstaffed, the cuts Musk proposed were “unimaginable” and would put Twitter’s users at risk of hacks and exposure to offensive material such as child pornography.

“It would be a cascading effect,” he said, “where you’d have services going down and the people remaining not having the institutional knowledge to get them back up, and being completely demoralized and wanting to leave themselves.”

[Uncle]

https://twitter.com/exec_sum/status/1583226406430945281

something you don't admit until you're confident there's not enough advance notice for them to sabotage anything on the way out

[Tasty]

Now do the other 25%

[Uncle]

Now do the other 25%

 

[benjipwns]

(well, it's properly mostly the banks' money).

Don't make me report you to the Federal Republic of Germany for spreading disinformation online.

[james]

https://twitter.com/exec_sum/status/1583226406430945281

Corporate takeover 101

Fire 75% of employees. Hire 10,000 new people in India to do the same job for 90% less

[Tasty]

Now do the other 25%

 

[Occam]

(well, it's properly mostly the banks' money).

Don't make me report you to the Federal Republic of Germany for spreading disinformation online.

Seems autocorrect somehow turned probably into properly (mobile device), I normally don't use it.

[chronovore]

Thread title now seems prescient.

[jorma]

(well, it's properly mostly the banks' money).

Don't make me report you to the Federal Republic of Germany for spreading disinformation online.

Seems autocorrect somehow turned probably into properly (mobile device), I normally don't use it.

the german authorities would probably say that using mobile to surf the internet while not being a zoomer is no valid excuse

but that was properly not the part benji called misinformation since staking 13 out of the 44 billions cannot be described as "mostly their money"

[benjipwns]

It was wild the other week seeing all the Blue Checks running around gloating and claiming that Musk couldn't afford it and was going to lose all of Tesla and then probably go bankrupt and wind up in jail when he had already sold enough stock and that's not how any of it works anyway.

[Pissy F Benny]

when's the deal going through? i want one last bit of blue tick schadenfreude with them acting like the apocalypse is neigh because they can't stomp their feet and get trump rebanned

then we get to laugh when musk gets in his feelings cos someone called him a fanook and bans them

[Nintex]

I will enjoy unregulated Twitter for the 3 days EU citizens can access it. 

It reminds me of a trick young Nintex did once to destroy a competitor. A friend of mine managed to hack an admin account of a rival Nintendo fansite thing.
They were pretty much like ResetEra is now, putting up appearances in public but then using their secret boards to talk shit about everybody behind their backs.
We knew it was bad from leaks but it was far more toxic can we could even imagine. Calling the lady who did PR for Nintendo an "ugly fat slut" and the PoC Ubisoft PR guy the "N-word" for not sending them review copies.

So I logged in with the admin account, demodded all the other admins and made all their secret mod boards public. So everyone could read how they really felt about their members, advertisers and PR contacts.
And to erase all our tracks, I deleted the hacked admin account also. It took them 2 days to figure out a way to pull down their site (it took advertisers/PR contacts less than 10 minutes to block and drop them) and those 2 days were absolute madness 

Afterwards my friend freaked out because they announced they would bring lawsuits and hire a cyber security company to find out who did it.
At that point though I was already helping them built the case against a former staff member.

[BIONIC]

Nintex is the 500 lb man laying on his bed in his basement that Trump warned us about all along