Author Topic: Malek's Diary-ah (Read 85652 times)

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #300 on:** March 20, 2009, 08:52:51 PM »

Minor update: Flannel Girl seemed to have the giggles today in class; she kept laughing uncontrollably during a lecture. I like a girl who laughs, or at least theoretically I do. Especially one who has a good laugh like she does.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #301 on:** March 22, 2009, 02:57:45 AM »

Managed to actually study tonight as Flannel Girl only dominated 98% of my thoughts.

[youtube=560,345]wauUtw6Ofa8[/youtube]

Here I stand head in hand
Turn my face to the wall
If she's gone I can't go on
Feelin' two-foot small

Everywhere people stare
Each and every day
I can see them laugh at me
And I hear them say

Hey! you've got to hide your love away
Hey! you've got to hide your love away

How can I even try
I can never win
Hearing them, seeing them
In the state I'm in

How could she say to me
Love will find a way
Gather round all you clowns
Let me hear you say

Hey! you've got to hide your love away
Hey! you've got to hide your love away

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #302 on:** March 22, 2009, 11:38:52 AM »

what does your shrink say about your flannel girl obsession?

Diunx · « **Reply #303 on:** March 22, 2009, 11:52:51 AM »

He asked for pics.

Cheebs · « **Reply #304 on:** March 22, 2009, 11:57:05 AM »

Quote from: Malek on March 20, 2009, 08:52:51 PM

Minor update: Flannel Girl seemed to have the giggles today in class; she kept laughing uncontrollably during a lecture. I like a girl who laughs, or at least theoretically I do. Especially one who has a good laugh like she does.

she was probably reading text messages from some hunk telling her all the sexual acts he will do with her later that night.

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #305 on:** March 22, 2009, 12:07:29 PM »

so mean Cheebs.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #306 on:** March 22, 2009, 12:16:41 PM »

Quote from: Father_Mike on March 22, 2009, 11:38:52 AM

what does your shrink say about your flannel girl obsession?

She said that I was building Flannel Girl up in my mind and that if I got to know her, I'd discover she wasn't actually perfect. And that once I realized she wasn't perfect, I wouldn't worry about being inadequate in her presence and wouldn't feel intimidated by her.

My shrink also said that Flannel Girl, if she's as attractive as I've described, probably has several boyfriends. She can be mean, too.

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #307 on:** March 22, 2009, 12:25:29 PM »

Ouch.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #308 on:** March 22, 2009, 12:37:51 PM »

Quote from: Jinfash on March 22, 2009, 12:35:33 PM

That sounds exactly like what I was telling the other day, and I didn't charge by the hour.

That's right: you charge a flat-fee, like all man-whores.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #309 on:** March 22, 2009, 12:48:46 PM »

Next time don't try to talk so much. If I wanted you to talk, I would have removed the ball gag.

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #310 on:** March 22, 2009, 12:56:33 PM »

emoticon dom Malek seems so happy.

recursivelyenumerable · « **Reply #311 on:** March 22, 2009, 01:18:21 PM »

i wish i had a woman to idealize and pine away after. i haven't met anyone like that in over a year. :'(

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #312 on:** March 22, 2009, 03:56:41 PM »

So I just got an email from OK Cupid containing my quiver matches, and she was at number one:

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

FML

recursivelyenumerable · « **Reply #313 on:** March 22, 2009, 04:02:17 PM »

i think it's bad form to post people's online dating profile/pics to ridicule them. or to post them at all, actually.

Olivia Wilde Homo · « **Reply #314 on:** March 22, 2009, 04:10:21 PM »

Go for it man.

Dickie Dee · « **Reply #315 on:** March 22, 2009, 04:11:26 PM »

Quote from: Malek on March 22, 2009, 03:56:41 PM

So I just got an email from OK Cupid containing my quiver matches, and she was at number one:

spoiler (click to show/hide)
[close]

FML

At least honesty is a virtue...

TVC15 · « **Reply #316 on:** March 22, 2009, 05:32:41 PM »

So when is Malek's stalking going to go over the top? He's going to go all Andrew Rosenblum on this whore and turn her into a pez dispenser, I bet.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #317 on:** March 22, 2009, 05:55:25 PM »

Quote from: TVC 15 on March 22, 2009, 05:32:41 PM

So when is Malek's stalking going to go over the top? He's going to go all Andrew Rosenblum on this whore and turn her into a pez dispenser, I bet.

My expectations are that she either doesn't really know that I exist or, if she does, she's not attracted to me. Consequently, it's difficult to imagine a scenario where I'm devastated to the point where I snap and pull a Rosenblum.

bud · « **Reply #318 on:** March 22, 2009, 06:13:47 PM »

perhaps it's both--she's not attracted to you and therefore you do not exist

Fresh Prince · « **Reply #319 on:** March 22, 2009, 06:24:41 PM »

Quote from: Malek on March 22, 2009, 12:16:41 PM

She said that I was building Flannel Girl up in my mind and that if I got to know her, I'd discover she wasn't actually perfect. And that once I realized she wasn't perfect, I wouldn't worry about being inadequate in her presence and wouldn't feel intimidated by her.

My shrink also said that Flannel Girl, if she's as attractive as I've described, probably has several boyfriends. She can be mean, too.

This coupled with her being an anarchist ...

recursivelyenumerable · « **Reply #320 on:** March 22, 2009, 06:54:27 PM »

I think I'm falling in love with Malek's shrink

TVC15 · « **Reply #321 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:11:39 PM »

Why did you decide on a female shrink, Malek? I really couldn't imagine seeing one of a different gender than myself.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #322 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:13:24 PM »

Rec, it's Flannel Girl who's the anarchist.

TVC 15, I didn't choose a psychologist; the school simply assigned me one.

edit: anyway I prefer a female. I'd be hesitant to show any vulnerability or weakness in front of a male counselor.

Grecco · « **Reply #323 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:14:36 PM »

your school gives you psychiatric help?

TVC15 · « **Reply #324 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:14:56 PM »

Quote from: Malek on March 22, 2009, 07:13:24 PM

Rec, it's Flannel Girl who's the anarchist.

TVC 15, I didn't choose a psychologist; the school simply assigned me one.

Hmm, communism at work. What does she look like? How does she usually sit when you are speaking with her?

Quote from: Grecco on March 22, 2009, 07:14:36 PM

your school gives you psychiatric help?

Most schools offer counseling of some sort.

recursivelyenumerable · « **Reply #325 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:15:43 PM »

The last girl I fell in unrequited whatever with was also an anarchist with several boyfriends.

and man, I can't wait to go back to school so I can get a snarky counselor of my own.

demi · « **Reply #326 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:17:35 PM »

Quote from: Malek on March 22, 2009, 03:56:41 PM

So I just got an email from OK Cupid containing my quiver matches, and she was at number one:

spoiler (click to show/hide)
[close]

FML

Looks like perfect atheist wife material. Only ugly people turn away from God.

recursivelyenumerable · « **Reply #327 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:19:35 PM »

God started it, though.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #328 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:21:13 PM »

Quote from: TVC 15 on March 22, 2009, 07:14:56 PM

Hmm, communism at work. What does she look like? How does she usually sit when you are speaking with her?

She's in her early forties. She has short brown hair, blue eyes. She has an average build.

She sits a couple of feet in front of me, almost never diverts eye contact, and usually has her legs crossed.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #329 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:21:34 PM »

Quote from: recursivelyenumerable on March 22, 2009, 07:19:35 PM

God started it, though.

demi · « **Reply #330 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:22:43 PM »

Quote from: recursivelyenumerable on March 22, 2009, 07:19:35 PM

God started it, though.

And look what he did to your face. Should have stayed by his side.

TVC15 · « **Reply #331 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:23:26 PM »

Quote from: Malek on March 22, 2009, 07:21:13 PM

Quote from: TVC 15 on March 22, 2009, 07:14:56 PM

Hmm, communism at work. What does she look like? How does she usually sit when you are speaking with her?

She's in her early forties. She has short brown hair, blue eyes. She has an average build.

She sits a couple of feet in front of me, almost never diverts eye contact, and usually has her legs crossed.

Interesting. Are her nipples ever hard?

recursivelyenumerable · « **Reply #332 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:23:50 PM »

Quote

She's in her early forties. She has short brown hair, blue eyes. She has an average build.

sounds like my type pretty much. can you give me her number?

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #333 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:25:31 PM »

Quote from: recursivelyenumerable on March 22, 2009, 07:15:43 PM

The last girl I fell in unrequited whatever with was also an anarchist with several boyfriends.

and man, I can't wait to go back to school so I can get a snarky counselor of my own.

she's been breaking my balls the last few weeks. I think she's getting tired of hearing about Flannel Girl.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

In before "she's not the only one."

[close]

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #334 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:27:29 PM »

Quote from: TVC 15 on March 22, 2009, 07:23:26 PM

Are her nipples ever hard?

Not that I noticed. (Flannel Girl's, on the other hand, have been on a few occasions.)

Quote from: recursivelyenumerable on March 22, 2009, 07:23:50 PM

can you give me her number?

Get your own shrink/MILF.

TVC15 · « **Reply #335 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:27:55 PM »

Have you tried looking up her skirt? I saw up Welch's skirt several times last night in Star Ocean 4. There's just this ugly-ass stretch texture where her twat should be. The worst part is that you can see up her skirt like several times every cutscene she is in. They should have textured some panties on her.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #336 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:29:42 PM »

She's at the age where a skirt isn't her friend.

edit: I find it odd that I've received more questions about my shrink's appearance than I have about Flannel Girl's.

Cheebs · « **Reply #337 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:31:18 PM »

did you tell her about spending time on online message boards?

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #338 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:31:58 PM »

Quote from: Cheebs on March 22, 2009, 07:31:18 PM

did you tell her about spending time on online message boards?

yeah. $:-\$

She said you guys were a destructive influence.

TVC15 · « **Reply #339 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:36:15 PM »

Quote from: Malek on March 22, 2009, 07:31:58 PM

Quote from: Cheebs on March 22, 2009, 07:31:18 PM
did you tell her about spending time on online message boards?

yeah. $:-\$

She said you guys were a destructive influence.

Yet you keep coming back for more. And you can't even provide adequate sexy descriptions to help me work through this blood pressure medication and maintain an erection.

Cheebs · « **Reply #340 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:36:22 PM »

Quote from: Malek on March 22, 2009, 07:31:58 PM

Quote from: Cheebs on March 22, 2009, 07:31:18 PM
did you tell her about spending time on online message boards?

yeah. $:-\$

She said you guys were a destructive influence.

how did you describe this place?

Fresh Prince · « **Reply #341 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:36:37 PM »

So far your shrink has been right about everything. Ask her next if she thinks you'll die alone.

Grecco · « **Reply #342 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:37:10 PM »

Quote from: Malek on March 22, 2009, 07:29:42 PM

She's at the age where a skirt isn't her friend.

edit: I find it odd that I've received more questions about my shrink's appearance than I have about Flannel Girl's.

the whole shrink, patient thing is sexy.

Fresh Prince · « **Reply #343 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:38:20 PM »

Does she look like the shrink from Sopranos?

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #344 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:40:42 PM »

Quote from: TVC 15 on March 22, 2009, 07:36:15 PM

Yet you keep coming back for more. And you can't even provide adequate sexy descriptions to help me work through this blood pressure medication and maintain an erection.

I honestly don't what kind of sexual descriptions I can give about a forty year old woman that would give a dying gay man a hard-on. This is an impossible task.

Quote from: Cheebs on March 22, 2009, 07:36:22 PM

how did you describe this place?

She didn't understand the gay subtext.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #345 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:41:55 PM »

Quote from: Fresh Prince on March 22, 2009, 07:38:20 PM

Does she look like the shrink from Sopranos?

She thinner and pastier and doesn't wear glasses.

Grecco · « **Reply #346 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:42:25 PM »

Quote from: Malek on March 22, 2009, 07:40:42 PM

Quote from: TVC 15 on March 22, 2009, 07:36:15 PM

Yet you keep coming back for more. And you can't even provide adequate sexy descriptions to help me work through this blood pressure medication and maintain an erection.

I honestly don't what kind of sexual descriptions I can give about a forty year old woman that would give a dying gay man a hard-on. This is an impossible task.

Quote from: Cheebs on March 22, 2009, 07:36:22 PM
how did you describe this place?

theres plenty of hot 40 year old chicks

She didn't understand the gay subtext.

TVC15 · « **Reply #347 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:43:15 PM »

Quote from: Malek on March 22, 2009, 07:40:42 PM

Quote from: TVC 15 on March 22, 2009, 07:36:15 PM

Yet you keep coming back for more. And you can't even provide adequate sexy descriptions to help me work through this blood pressure medication and maintain an erection.

I honestly don't what kind of sexual descriptions I can give about a forty year old woman that would give a dying gay man a hard-on. This is an impossible task.

And you wonder why you never win with this sort of defeatist attitude.

Cheebs · « **Reply #348 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:43:51 PM »

Quote from: Malek on March 22, 2009, 07:40:42 PM

I honestly don't what kind of sexual descriptions I can give about a forty year old woman that would give a dying gay man a hard-on. This is an impossible task.

I think you forget this is TVC, his alt account here is that old lady sex therapist Dr. something, I forgot "her" name. He has a thing for older therapists.

TVC15 · « **Reply #349 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:45:13 PM »

Wrong, dumbass.

1) I don't have a joke character.

2) I have a thing for bestiality, incest, and general paraphilia, not older therapists.

Cheebs · « **Reply #350 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:46:39 PM »

Quote from: TVC 15 on March 22, 2009, 07:45:13 PM

Wrong, dumbass.

1) I don't have a joke character.

2) I have a thing for bestiality, incest, and general paraphilia, not older therapists.

DrMiletski

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #351 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:46:55 PM »

Quote from: Fresh Prince on March 22, 2009, 07:36:37 PM

So far your shrink has been right about everything. Ask her next if she thinks you'll die alone.

I think she's insinuated that I might need to lower my unreasonably high standards; otherwise, I will $:-\$

Quote from: TVC 15 on March 22, 2009, 07:43:15 PM

And you wonder why you never win with this sort of defeatist attitude.

During our sessions, she takes off her clothes to reveal her skin tight body suit made out of the skin of aborted fetuses.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Am I heading in the right direction?

[close]

Barry Egan · « **Reply #352 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:48:40 PM »

you should probably send her a link to this thread. I'm not sure she quite understands what she's dealing with yet.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #353 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:51:12 PM »

Quote from: Chipopo on March 22, 2009, 07:48:40 PM

you should probably send her a link to this thread. I'm not sure she quite understands what she's dealing with yet.

Well, I think she would have me assigned to someone else; that is, if she has a colleague she doesn't like, she would. Otherwise, she'd just call security when I showed up.

TVC15 · « **Reply #354 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:54:57 PM »

Quote from: Malek on March 22, 2009, 07:46:55 PM

Quote from: Fresh Prince on March 22, 2009, 07:36:37 PM
So far your shrink has been right about everything. Ask her next if she thinks you'll die alone.

I think she's insinuated that I might need to lower my unreasonably high standards; otherwise, I will $:-\$

Quote from: TVC 15 on March 22, 2009, 07:43:15 PM
And you wonder why you never win with this sort of defeatist attitude.

During our sessions, she takes off her clothes to reveal her skin tight body suit made out of the skin of aborted fetuses.

spoiler (click to show/hide)
Am I heading in the right direction?
[close]

Why would I be turned on by fetuses? Do I look like JayDubya?

I'mma go and read this new issue of Skeptic magazine now. It has an article on "The great self esteem and positive thinking debacle." At least you never fell for that particular scam, Malek.

Fresh Prince · « **Reply #355 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:56:21 PM »

Quote from: Malek on March 22, 2009, 07:46:55 PM

I think she's insinuated that I might need to lower my unreasonably high standards; otherwise, I will $:-\$

So you know they are unreasonably high yet you do nothing?

Hell Malek just do the first year college thing ask her for out for a cup of coffee and just get it over and done with.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #356 on:** March 22, 2009, 07:59:21 PM »

Quote from: Fresh Prince on March 22, 2009, 07:56:21 PM

Quote from: Malek on March 22, 2009, 07:46:55 PM
I think she's insinuated that I might need to lower my unreasonably high standards; otherwise, I will $:-\$
So you know they are unreasonably high yet you do nothing?
Hell Malek just do the first year college thing ask her for out for a cup of coffee and just get it over and done with.

* Malek is overcome by negative thoughts involving Flannel Girl turning him down, an event that would further lower his already basement-dwelling self-esteem.

Barry Egan · « **Reply #357 on:** March 22, 2009, 08:07:34 PM »

Look buddy, you're an ICON. on EVILBORE. What more could that dumb cunt want?

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #358 on:** March 22, 2009, 08:10:28 PM »

Quote from: Chipopo on March 22, 2009, 08:07:34 PM

Look buddy, you're an ICON. on EVILBORE. What more could that dumb cunt want?

Chiseled good looks, rock-hard abs, a great smile, and a large, toilet-paper-roll crushingly thick penis.

Wait, or is that what I want in a mate.

TVC15 · « **Reply #359 on:** March 22, 2009, 08:12:12 PM »

Seriously, Malek, have you considered becoming a juggalo like demi? Bare minimum, you will get more ass and people won't care what you smell like.

Quote

juggalos are society's underdogs... poor ghetto freaks... eating ramen noodles... drinking faygo cola... and sporting pro wing shoes... made fun of in school... never accepted by anyone... tossed out by the world that didn't want them... these group of outcasts... brought together by the music and real life messages of the insane clown posse... are followers of the dark carnival and scapegoats of the world...

being a juggalos isn't about being a "fan" of icp... j and shaggs are juggalos themselves... being a juggalo is about individuality... no one is ever fully accepted in this world... and juggalos just don't give a fuck... so we sling our faygo, jam to the wicked shit, and wave our middle fingers to the legions of hypocrites, haters, and rich ass bitches trying to bring us down...

everyone in this world is so quick to judge... the close minded percentage of the population hears the "cuss words" in icp's music and automatically labels them "satanic" or "trash"... but icp's music is laden with messages you bitches never stop to hear... the "bad language" just weeds out the listeners that could never be juggalos anyways...

juggalos are opposed to bigotry and domestic violence... we see the world from a much different angle... and we have the ability to look past petty stereo-types and prejudices... juggalos come in all shapes, sizes, colors, and races... and still we are not like you... we look different, we talk different, and we act different... we have no need to impress...

you put on your fake smile and your fancy suit... you go to work and lick your boss' ass crack... and make small talk with your "friends" and talk shit about them in the same breath... and you go home to your wife and kids and you kiss them with the lips you been sucking on your assistant's tits with... and you continue to live in your utterly corrupted fake world...

juggalos live in the real world... we say what we mean and we mean what we say... we don't front for anyone... and you will never change us...

but of course... to fully understand what a juggalo is... you must truly be one...

It does sound a bit like you.

News:

Poll

Will I win or lose my moot court case?

Author Topic: Malek's Diary-ah (Read 85652 times)