The Official Psychoanalysis GAF Thread

[Barry Egan]

So apparently Uncharted 3 got an 8/10 from some magazine, and it's an absolute crisis.

I desperately want to troll about how Skyward Sword must be better, but I know that would be an instant ban.

Link?

[magus]

So apparently Uncharted 3 got an 8/10 from some magazine, and it's an absolute crisis.

I desperately want to troll about how Skyward Sword must be better, but I know that would be an instant ban.

I SAY WE CAN GET A 100 PAGE THREAD IF WE GET A REVIEW THAT GIVES 8 TO SKYWARD SWORD

ACTUALY I SAID 100? 150! WE CAN AIM FOR 150!

spoiler (click to show/hide)

that place is so stupid and sometimes i worry it rubs on me

[close]

[Barry Egan]

Just reading a few pages of that made me depressed.

[Tasty]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=32102086&postcount=3251

It's Apple versus Mac.

 

[magus]

i know this isn't related to GAF but....

http://gonintendo.com/?mode=viewstory&id=164523
http://gonintendo.com/?mode=viewstory&id=164611

poor little buddy,posting video of 360 games while waiting for the wii u release isn't probably doing him any good for his psyche

[Stoney Mason]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=32102086&postcount=3251

It's Apple versus Mac.

 

yeah had a brainfart there.

Also yeah you can expect that sort of attitude from GAF. The only good review is a review that confirms their already held opinion before even playing a game.

[brob]

oh jeez @ the eurogamer meltdowns.

[Broseidon]

The most pathetic shit I've ever seen on GAF.

[brob]

My memory might be playing tricks on me but I remember the 8.8 debacle being worse.

[Broseidon]

I didn't experience that, thankfully.

[Oblivion]

The first Uncharted never lit the world on fire, so I have no idea why Sony fans would expect the sequel would achieve 10s accross the board. It was never a top tier title to begin with, and the biggest thing it had going for it was the megatextures and other graphical whizbangs and what have you.

Hell, they should be glad that it's gotten the amount of 9's+ as it has at the moment.

[Tasty]

I do remember 8.8 being bad, not even on NeoGAF but just in the Nintendo circles I ran in back then. But back then, nobody expected reviews to really differ on AAA games like they sometimes do today. It was more expected they all fall in a neat little line, whereas today, either reviewers feel more bold about their opinions or they legitimately want attention. Like today, I'm expecting 7 or 8/10 reviews for SS, and I just care much less about reviews in general.

Doesn't excuse such execrable posts, though.

yeah had a brainfart there.

You might be able to make the argument that Apple is paying more attention to iOS and neglecting their Mac products, but it's harder to make that argument since Lion.

[Stoney Mason]

You might be able to make the argument that Apple is paying more attention to iOS and neglecting their Mac products, but it's harder to make that argument since Lion.

 

Nah. I meant Windows versus MacOs. Or just in the general the windows versus mac debate.

[brob]

half tuck > do-rag

[Tasty]

People still fucking care about metacritic and gamerankings?

You know what they're you're posting in, right?

[Broseidon]

I cant enjoy a game if some perfect stranger says it's not the best thing sincce penicillin.

Even though I've never played it.

And it's exactly the same as the previous 2 ones.

[brob]

Played maybe fifteen minutes of uncharted 1. isn't it just the same as uncharted 2 except with less 'production value'?

[brob]

ludology states that video games are only as good as their mechanics and the interactivity available to the player through them. 

[Tasty]

People still fucking care about metacritic and gamerankings?

You know what they're you're posting in, right?

wait, wat?

We're bitching about GAF, who of course have people that care about that stuff. Duh. 

[Stoney Mason]

I legit like and respect Uncharted. Unlike a lot of Sony franchises (See Resistance or Killzone or others) it actually deserves real merit and praise imo.

Some fans like to try to pretend its outside of the shooter category through to give it more cred or something which tickles me. The light platforming and light puzzle solving in that game are enjoyable but the bulk of the game you spend shooting people in the face or mowing down waves of enemies like most other shooters. (or watching cutscenes)

Good game though. Good production values in it especially.

[Stoney Mason]

[cool breeze]

uncharted 2 (and 3) have the best set piece moments in games.  the shooting and movement still feel great, specificity your character's mobility, but it's not the reason to play the game.  I barely touched Uncharted 2 multiplayer.  it's all about the pacing, situations and environment for me.  Like, the section in Uncharted 2 when you're jumping between moving vehicles was incredible.  Playing it earlier this year, it is still incredible.  Those moments are unmatched by any other game.

that said, the fans are nutso.  I'll never understand what they're trying to accomplish by being acting so belligerent and idiotic.  I saw subhumans complaining about the possibility of Jeff Gerstmann reviewing Skyward Sword because he might give it a bad score.  Because, like, he's free to have an opinion as long as he never ever expresses it.  Think Zelda is an 8/10? take it to the grave.

[Olivia Wilde Homo]

I don't see anyone making death threats to the writer of the review so I guess it isn't quite as bad as 8.8.

[etiolate]

The problem is these sites continue to use numbers to relate quality and then have 15 year olds do the reviews. Some run of the mill game is going to get a 9 and some big game is going to get an 8.5 and voila! Internet hyerpmania.

[Vizzys]

7.9 sounds about right to me

[Phoenix Dark]

I thought Sunshine was very fun. But then again I was a Gamecube exclusive gamer

[fistfulofmetal]

Sunshine is one of the best sci-fi movies in the last decade

[Phoenix Dark]

Double Dash was awesome. But then again I have 3 brothers, so it was perfect for us

[Himu]

3 is always the worst ND game entry

[Van Cruncheon]

The most notable fan shitfits I remember are Frank Provo's review of Shenmue (6.7 I think?  The only honest review of the game at the time), the Mario Kart Double Dash review from IGN (7.9), and of course the brilliant Gerstmann review of Twilight Princess (8.8, which was masterfully followed by giving the GC version an 8.9).  Time will tell if the Eurogamer Uncharted 3 "8" will join that mighty legion, but it's looking good so far.

of course it will. does ANYONE remember the other scores or reviews given to shemue, dd, or tp - or even their metacritic/gr averages? the canonical score for a game is the one that gets the most attention. as it should be.

[Himu]

then again, i can't imagine uncharted 3 being worse than uncharted 1. jesus what a mediocre game.

[Phoenix Dark]

3 is always the worst ND game entry

might want to brush up on the math skills, breh

[FoneBone]

The most notable fan shitfits I remember are Frank Provo's review of Shenmue (6.7 I think?  The only honest review of the game at the time), the Mario Kart Double Dash review from IGN (7.9), and of course the brilliant Gerstmann review of Twilight Princess (8.8, which was masterfully followed by giving the GC version an 8.9).  Time will tell if the Eurogamer Uncharted 3 "8" will join that mighty legion, but it's looking good so far.

Anal-retentive notes - Shenmue was a 6.8 (c'mon, it was a GAF meme for years!)  And the IGN Double Dash controversy was made all the more hilarious because it was promptly followed by Gamespot giving it the exact same score.

[Himu]

3 is always the worst ND game entry

might want to brush up on the math skills, breh

Crash 3
Jak 3

pretty sure the same will be for Uncharted 3, though I'm sure it won't be worse than 1, it'll probably be worse than 2.

Hoping it turns out well, though.

[Tasty]

honestly, as much as i enjoy twilight princess once you get out of the intro chunk, that 8.8 is even looking a little high.

8 is about what the intro chunk should get, the dungeons are easily 9.5 material.

[Himu]

Sorry Himu, but both Crash and Jak had awesome first games. Jak in particular had one great game in the first and whatever the second and third tried to be.

Jak 2 > Jak 1 > Jak 3
Crash 2 > Crash 1 > Crash 3
Uncharted 2 > Uncharted 1

looks like we're right on schedule

[Himu]

hahaha 8 for the intro chunk?  people shouldn't fucking dread playing '8' material, Andy.  that intro is like a three hour 5-6 game with a 9 game chasing it.  A shaky 9 at that.  I think if I were still in such a poor state that I was earning my living writing reviews, I'd have given the GCN version an 8.5 and the Wii version an 8.

i had wii version and when you do that fishing tutorial I was stuck on it for like 20 minutes because of the new fangled wii controls. went to gamefaqs, and there were like 100 topics about the same fucking thing

[BlueTsunami]

Man, all this talk of Uncharted, Gears, Zelda and shit made me realize I only play Bethesda games and the odd JRPG

[Tasty]

TP's dungeons kinda paled in comparison to OOT, MM or WW for most of the game.

Nah, no way. The only two duds were the final dungeons. The rest were incredible.

[Himu]

TP's dungeons kinda paled in comparison to OOT, MM or WW for most of the game.

Nah, no way. The only two duds were the final dungeons. The rest were incredible.

He said most of the game. He has a point, TP's gameplay doesn't pick up until the second half, though I really like the first half.

[Crushed]

literally just realized the other day that every tp dungeon was this:

go right
go left
go forward

[Himu]

isn't the snow mansion better about that?

[Crushed]

even that one!

"i left the mirror in this side!" "no that side!" "no this side!" "okay, i show you way forward"

[etiolate]

i lurved windwakers world and stuff like the forest dungeon, forest dungeon boss, the hyrule castle segment and being able to go out exploring in a boat

[Mr. Gundam]

Aside from the terrible sailing fetch quest, I really enjoyed Wind Waker.

[Himu]

I liked Wind Waker's sailing. I would fill out my map just sailing around because I'm a masochist.

Dungeons were forgettable.

[Phoenix Dark]

I loved sailing around in Wind Waker, especially at night. The dungeons were fun and I loooved the controls. Sadly I never beat the game, but one of these days I'll whip it out and finish

[Crushed]

wind waker has a really odd, thoughtful ending for a zelda game that in retrospect i've kind of interpreted as a message from nintendo to stop clinging to old concepts of hyrule and the legend of zelda and let a new generation of gamers find its own legend of zelda

then they decided to make twilight princess brown and "mature" and oot-like to sell to american nostalgic nin-nerds 

[Himu]

oh, come off it. TP has more than brown in it -- there's green too!

[Crushed]

and then the game broke out some weird greens and purples, but made sure you were a fucking dog hunting bugs with the same exact bad background music for most of those

[MCD]

Man, all this talk of Uncharted, Gears, Zelda and shit made me realize I only play Bethesda games and the odd JRPG

You poor thing.

[Tasty]

wind waker has a really odd, thoughtful ending for a zelda game that in retrospect i've kind of interpreted as a message from nintendo to stop clinging to old concepts of hyrule and the legend of zelda and let a new generation of gamers find its own legend of zelda

then they decided to make twilight princess brown and "mature" and oot-like to sell to american nostalgic nin-nerds 

In all actuality, that entire game was sort of exactly that. I'll never truly understand how they had the balls to make a game like that hot off the heels of Majora's Mask. That's like the biggest 180 in Nintendo franchise history and I doubt anything like it will happen again.

Even back then, I think Nintendo knew how big OoT was and that the only way out of its shadow was to do something completely different (but staying within the same series with similar conventions, obviously.)

[cool breeze]

The most notable fan shitfits I remember are Frank Provo's review of Shenmue (6.7 I think?  The only honest review of the game at the time), the Mario Kart Double Dash review from IGN (7.9), and of course the brilliant Gerstmann review of Twilight Princess (8.8, which was masterfully followed by giving the GC version an 8.9).  Time will tell if the Eurogamer Uncharted 3 "8" will join that mighty legion, but it's looking good so far.

almost maps out who were the most depraved for each generation.  right now it's more of a tie between nintendo and sony fanthings.

wind waker has a really odd, thoughtful ending for a zelda game that in retrospect i've kind of interpreted as a message from nintendo to stop clinging to old concepts of hyrule and the legend of zelda and let a new generation of gamers find its own legend of zelda

then they decided to make twilight princess brown and "mature" and oot-like to sell to american nostalgic nin-nerds 

I wouldn't be surprised if they saw Lord of the Rings popularity and jumped on something similar.  Also, Phantom Hourglass aped Pirates of the Caribbean.  Spirit Tracks aped Densha de Go and really awful kiddie anime.  Skyward Sword has similarities to Avatar.

[EmCeeGrammar]

Oh hey Crushed is here.  I was hoping to have an audience for some Gerstmann bashing.

edit: Gertsman?
fake edit 2: Gutsman?

[Crushed]

wind waker has a really odd, thoughtful ending for a zelda game that in retrospect i've kind of interpreted as a message from nintendo to stop clinging to old concepts of hyrule and the legend of zelda and let a new generation of gamers find its own legend of zelda

then they decided to make twilight princess brown and "mature" and oot-like to sell to american nostalgic nin-nerds 

In all actuality, that entire game was sort of exactly that. I'll never truly understand how they had the balls to make a game like that hot off the heels of Majora's Mask. That's like the biggest 180 in Nintendo franchise history and I doubt anything like it will happen again.

Even back then, I think Nintendo knew how big OoT was and that the only way out of its shadow was to do something completely different (but staying within the same series with similar conventions, obviously.)

like the whole story is that there was once this super-amazing hero of time that everyone talked about because he was the greatest ever but then there's this new kid and everyone kind of picks on him for not being the dude from the past, but then he proves himself on his own merits. the remnants of the past, everyone who sees him in relation to some old story about ocarinas and horses, gets left behind while the seeds for a new future are sewn.

over a year later, manchildren in los angeles are crying and screaming because link is a Teenage Anime on a horse fighting uruk-hai and goblins in an empty green texture


edit: oh yeah, def. agreed on the LotR reference. The corrupted Goron boss was literally the Balrog. And let's not forget Phantom Hourglass, with its bumbling greedy-with-a-heart-of-gold pirate who loves the sea and is totally dissheveled and insists on being called "Captain" and has a loopy brass theme. Definitely NOT a gangrenous Jack Sparrow!!

[EmCeeGrammar]

Skyward Sword's influences are Studio Ghibli movies.  Pay attention to the way the fire temple boss' legs move as it crawls.  Its eeirly similar to several creatures' animations seen throughout Ghibli films.  The scope of the skyworld recalls Laputa.  The forest area has Totoro-esque creatures (including a big one).  The soundtrack reminds me a lot of Mononoke's so far.

There's other things I'm having trouble remembering now, but I doubt Avatar of all things were an inspiration.

[BlueTsunami]

Man, all this talk of Uncharted, Gears, Zelda and shit made me realize I only play Bethesda games and the odd JRPG

You poor thing.

Its like S&M; hurts so good

[cool breeze]

in Avatar there's a scene where cataliens are tested with taming a flying creature, and then fly around floating islands.
in Skyward Sword there's a scene where students are tested with taming a flying creature, and then flying around floating islands.

at least that aspect seems similar.  I mean, it could just be Nausicca with an animal serving as means for flying; floating islands from Laputa.  Whatever!

the pop culture influences are another reason why the timeline stuff is dumb.


edit: to bring it back to Uncharted:

Uncharted is Romancing the Stone
Uncharted 2 is National Treasure 1

I'm hoping Uncharted 3 takes cues from The Mummy Returns

[Himu]

AVATAR

suck it haters

[MCD]

Man, all this talk of Uncharted, Gears, Zelda and shit made me realize I only play Bethesda games and the odd JRPG

You poor thing.

Its like S&M; hurts so good

You into femdom?

Pegging is my favorite.