I mean, yeah. We screamed at him for what must have been like two years. But regardless if we helped him or not he's the one who dodged the bullet.
True!
Also who gets the math here? Does an ex's failure count as points in your favor, since you're presumably succeeding over them, or points against, since they considered you on their level at some point?
Any ex's failure is a failure for us all. Society must care for its own, even our EXs deserve compassion.
Naw, man, I'm funnin'.
One of my ex-girlfriends from college is a Facebook friend. I honestly hope for the best for her and, at the same time, I'm relieved that I'm not obligated to be a part of her struggle. She is smart, creative, industrious, and professionally productive. My parents were impressed with her, and it seemed possible that I'd end up with her permanently. She was probably the best looking woman I ever went out with, and like all beautiful women who don't realize it, she was a bit crazy. When I finally realized the level of her problems, and that she was not interested in pursuing improvement to her self-acknowledged problems, I cut my losses and broke it off.
When I see her updates, she's still struggling with the same set of problems that she ever had. Her husband seems like a nice enough guy. She's got three kids that are also creative, smart, and good looking. She's running her own business and is successful and popular in her niche. But she's ALWAYS having money problems (repairs to her car, home, business equipment, sales booths) and looking for solutions, living hand to mouth, and fretting about it publicly; then, turn around twice, and she's on a Disney cruise or visiting Disneyworld, or something else that I assume costs an assload of money. Her friends seem smart enough, but it feels to me like they're enabling her behavior by posting sympathy.
If I felt like reengaging on that level, I could say, "Hey, maybe instead of fretting about your business-critical van's transmission failing, maybe you could have a little nest egg by not doing a multi-day trip with airfare to Disneyworld?"
But I walked away from that for a reason, and I should stick with my initial assessment.
