Wank Dad 2: Electric Wankaloo

[Mandark]

I can't fathom how anyone can take this dude seriously. Some basic ass talking points packaged into pseudo-intellectual words. Somehow he makes a fortune selling his drivel to people.

Makes more sense if you think of him as a self-help dude than a political one. The market for that shit is yuuuuuuuuge, but generally the audiences don't loudly demand validation from the various cultural gatekeepers. Like nobody was yelling at the NYRB to give props to The Secret, yanno?

[Tasty]

"You watch Marvel movies HAHAHAHAHA"
-63.21% of all Assimilate posts

"Matrix Revolutions is secretly awesome guys!"
-36.79% of all Assimilate posts

[Assimilate]

it's also hilarious that you're in here screaming how dumb everyone is while you can even barely type coherently

no, you used the right word, you just don't know what it means because you aren't very smart

 

maybe you're on 4d autism chess but go on explain it to me

[Van Cruncheon]

most self-proclaimed atheists are just contrarians perpetually on the brink of intellectual rectal prolapse

and they're doubly sore that their brand of paaaaiiin isn't social currency

jp is what one of them evolves into when he holds a college degree and fights 99 pokemon #pokepsych

[agrajag]

i'd love to know what men can't do these days

graduate

lol

[Assimilate]

oh and

lol you're so gassed bro. have fun owning yourself more dipshit

Which gas station do you work at my guy?

Chevron? Shell?


 

[seagrams hotsauce]

libel entails irreparable damage to someones reputation. in no way did your pop pop suffer as a result of those comments. it's a dumb suit that will fail and it's yet another glaring red flag the lil goofballs who suck him off hilariously twist themselves in knots trying to explain

[benjipwns]

i'd love to know what men can't do these days

be a swamp witch

1. they'd be a swamp warlock
2. trump is draining the swamp

[seagrams hotsauce]

wow you realized gas station was two words, congrats bro showing real growth itt

[Van Cruncheon]

i'd love to know what men can't do these days

be a swamp witch

1. they'd be a swamp warlock
2. trump is draining the swamp

u down 2 yaga my baba bae 

[Mandark]

most self-proclaimed atheists are just contrarians perpetually on the brink of intellectual rectal prolapse

and they're doubly sore that their brand of paaaaiiin isn't social currency

I found an essay on how the "skeptic community" got suckered into a moral panic about campus political correctness, written by a guy who considers himself part of that community (it was published in Skeptic magazine).

That essay was published in 1996.

Time is a flat circle.

[agrajag]

[Assimilate]

libel entails irreparable damage to someones reputation. in no way did your pop pop suffer as a result of those consequences. it's a dumb suit that will fail and it's yet another glaring red flag the lil goofballs who suck him off hilariously twist themselves in knots trying to explain

Holy fuck.
So you're telling me i didn't understand what a defamation lawsuit is when he's in fact suing for defamation? http://torontosun.com/news/provincial/peterson-launches-defamation-suit-against-wilfrid-laurier-university

So you just went on that little beaky rant off your own interpretation of what will or will not happen in court?

WE HAVE REACHED BEAK AUTISM FOLKS

 

[Van Cruncheon]

i have yet to encounter any adult taxpaying human who holds a hot take on social issues identical to a college campus leftist radical

however, i know more'n a few -- many edging into retirement home territory -- who feel simpatico with daddy p

[seagrams hotsauce]

sigh. you're just not very smart dude. explains why you're so angry all the time tho

[CatsCatsCats]

you'll notice he's ducking my posts that break kayfabe

he's losing a game of chicken to the bore's premiere coward smh

He's ducking you, ducking me, ducking anything that he can' really argue against.

Say what you will about the late, great wankpappy. He at least had some conviction.

Fairytales and lies, he did the same thing

[Assimilate]

you'll notice he's ducking my posts that break kayfabe

he's losing a game of chicken to the bore's premiere coward smh

He's ducking you, ducking me, ducking anything that he can' really argue against.

Say what you will about the late, great wankpappy. He at least had some conviction.

What am i ducking? Sorry, i got distracted by a moron. Stupid me for even giving my time.

Continue...

[Oblivion]

libel entails irreparable damage to someones reputation. in no way did your pop pop suffer as a result of those consequences. it's a dumb suit that will fail and it's yet another glaring red flag the lil goofballs who suck him off hilariously twist themselves in knots trying to explain

Holy fuck.
So you're telling me i didn't understand what a defamation lawsuit is when he's in fact suing for defamation? http://torontosun.com/news/provincial/peterson-launches-defamation-suit-against-wilfrid-laurier-university

How does this statement address seagrams' post?

[benjipwns]

Peterson’s lawyer said the U of T professor cannot allow a university to viciously slander him, let alone compare his comments to a speech by Hitler, when he has spent his life and career teaching against the evils of the Holocaust and despots.

“The politically correct on campus should not think that they can defame people, slander people and bully people implicitly and explicitly with impunity,” Levitt said. “This isn’t just some internet troll mouthing off in a way that no one pays attention to and doesn’t give any credence to. These are professors and head of gender equity studies making comments that are atrocious about Dr. Peterson who is one of if not Canada’s most prominent intellectual.”

canada annihilated

[BisMarckie]

Peterson’s lawyer said the U of T professor cannot allow a university to viciously slander him, let alone compare his comments to a speech by Hitler, when he has spent his life and career teaching against the evils of the Holocaust and despots.

“The politically correct on campus should not think that they can defame people, slander people and bully people implicitly and explicitly with impunity,” Levitt said. “This isn’t just some internet troll mouthing off in a way that no one pays attention to and doesn’t give any credence to. These are professors and head of gender equity studies making comments that are atrocious about Dr. Peterson who is one of if not Canada’s most prominent intellectual.”

canada annihilated

[Tasty]

(Image removed from quote.)

You stole my post sloppier than Assy stole etoilet's schtick!

[Tasty]

Alt. reply:

You stole my post sloppier than Assy rode etoilet's dick!

[Mandark]

i have yet to encounter any adult taxpaying human who holds a hot take on social issues identical to a college campus leftist radical

however, i know more'n a few -- many edging into retirement home territory -- who feel simpatico with daddy p

like even if we conceded that kids are just making up genders to be trendy and guilt trip you over risque jokes and are always virtue signalin', how the FUCK does that get treated like an urgent social problem rather than mild annoyance?

look at this shit:




people literally dying but no, the real threat to civilization is buzzfeed listicle feminism

sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit

[Tasty]

Honestly, men (just like humans in general) are just so much better off today it makes the entire argument laughable on its face.

[Oblivion]

i have yet to encounter any adult taxpaying human who holds a hot take on social issues identical to a college campus leftist radical

however, i know more'n a few -- many edging into retirement home territory -- who feel simpatico with daddy p

like even if we conceded that kids are just making up genders to be trendy and guilt trip you over risque jokes and are always virtue signalin', how the FUCK does that get treated like an urgent social problem rather than mild annoyance?

look at this shit:

(Image removed from quote.)


people literally dying but no, the real threat to civilization is buzzfeed listicle feminism

sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit

The fact that gender pronouns are the worst and most oppressive struggles in people like Assimilate's life tells you a lot about his kind.

[agrajag]

Alt. reply:

You stole my post sloppier than Assy rode etoilet's dick!

your link is broken, so your image doesn't show up. Settle down, kiddo

[team filler]

libel entails irreparable damage to someones reputation. in no way did your pop pop suffer as a result of those consequences. it's a dumb suit that will fail and it's yet another glaring red flag the lil goofballs who suck him off hilariously twist themselves in knots trying to explain

Holy fuck.
So you're telling me i didn't understand what a defamation lawsuit is when he's in fact suing for defamation? http://torontosun.com/news/provincial/peterson-launches-defamation-suit-against-wilfrid-laurier-university

So you just went on that little beaky rant off your own interpretation of what will or will not happen in court?

WE HAVE REACHED BEAK AUTISM FOLKS

 

[Mandark]

Ugh who the fuck wants to live into their 80s anyway

I kinda want to read Winds of Winter

[BisMarckie]

Ugh who the fuck wants to live into their 80s anyway

Spoken like a true wrestling fan. 

[Assimilate]

Who said anything about stripping men of their masculinity? Unless you consider masculinity to be making more money than women for working the same job and being able to harass them without being condemned. Which basically means masculinity is to be babied. Don't think that's very masculine to be honest. There being some invisible war on masculinity is an alt-right talking point, yes.

Some people are born smarter than others is very different than what you posted, and I quote: "do i believe there could be a genetic difference between races in intelligence? -yes" you specified races. There's no science to back this up and it's essentially a racist view. It's also an alt-right talking point. Are you dense? Or do you just not want to associate yourself with trumpkins even though you pretty much agree with their views?

Yeah, i do think masculinity is under a bit of an attack. I see it, i've lived it. I've lived in a very progressive town, it was brutal. Does this reflect every suburban town in America? No, obviously not. I'm sure if you live in the midwest you don't see that. But in terms of coastal areas, yeah for sure.

And i do believe you can be born smarter. Breaking that down into one race or another isn't what i mean to say but i do believe if you marry smart, you will produce a smarter child. I think genetics play a big part. This only becomes controversial when you include black vs white, it's never controversial when it's asian vs white (well not it's becoming controversial after that harvard shit)

That's my take.

[BisMarckie]

Genetics play a part in determining intelligence? Stop the fucking presses.

Jordan Peterson truly has some groundbreaking ideas

[Mandark]

Yeah, i do think masculinity is under a bit of an attack. I see it, i've lived it. I've lived in a very progressive town, it was brutal.

oh no I'm having an actual giggle fit over this I'm so sorry

[Tasty]

Ugh who the fuck wants to live into their 80s anyway

I kinda want to read Winds of Winter

You think GRRM is lasting to his 80s breh?

[Assimilate]

What parts of masculinity specifically do you think are being attacked and why do you feel that's a negative? Are there parts being attacked that you think are positives?

Of course there's positives. Fat bastards in position of power shouldn't be able to jerk off in a bush in front of some woman because he can't stick his dick in her.

Genetics play a part in determining intelligence? Stop the fucking presses.

Jordan Peterson truly has some groundbreaking ideas

But this has been controversial 

[Tasty]

Yeah, i do think masculinity is under a bit of an attack. I see it, i've lived it. I've lived in a very progressive town, it was brutal.

If read in an over the top movie trailer voice, this could easily be the opening gag to a very stupid romantic-comedy movie about a modern day neanderthal who just can't quite seem to fit it..

[Assimilate]

I've lived in both and nope. Dumb internet battles in general, be they very woke tumblr or pissbaby 4chan almost never translate into real life like that

Of course not, jesus. 4chan translated into reality? Come on man

[Tasty]

I do think masculinity is under a bit of an attack.

I see it.

I've lived  it.

I've lived in a very "progressive" town...

It was brutal.


COMING SOON

[Mandark]

Yeah, i do think masculinity is under a bit of an attack. I see it, i've lived it. I've lived in a very progressive town, it was brutal.

If read in an over the top movie trailer voice, this could easily be the opening gag to a very stupid romantic-comedy movie about a modern day neanderthal who just can't quite seem to fit it..

I imagine Assimilate saying that as a grizzled old man, drinking whiskey at the VFW and holding some younger guys rapt with stories of the Cuck Offensive in the college intellectual War.

"We'd dig trenches. The days were okay, but it was night time they came for you. Cover of darkness. Wait for hours, total silence, and when you finally let yourself hope that it won't happen tonight, suddenly there they were. Saw my best friend get called problematic, couldn't look away. They ambushed me on patrol and told me their pronouns, but my boys rushed me back to a MASH unit in time. I was one of the lucky ones."

[benjipwns]

it was literally a figurative hell

[Assimilate]

I do think masculinity is under a bit of an attack.

I see it.

I've lived  it.

I've lived in a very "progressive" town...

It was brutal.


COMING SOON

  

[Van Cruncheon]

I see it, i've lived it. I've lived in a very progressive town, it was brutal.

NEWSFEED PLS

[BisMarckie]

 But this has been controversial 

There are myriads of studies that show a strong correlation. The only part that is controversial is to which extent genetics determine intelligence.
However any correlations with ethnicity or gender have been clearly debunked.

[Mandark]

In fairness the only male role models left now are soldiers, police, lawyers, fire fighters, professors, EMTs, chefs, pilots, doctors, teachers, athletes, musicians, construction workers, clergymen, politicians, finance dudes, tech bros, the countless fictional portrayals of all those roles, and then some that I forgot.

[Van Cruncheon]

you forgot marines

[Assimilate]

Good luck. That's his go to move, half answering half of your question then changing the subject and saying you're upset about it/calling you autistic.

Oh I know, just want to see if he can be a big boy for once.

There's not much else to answer? I don't go picking fights with people over this IRL no matter how bad the U.S is getting. I try to avoid it even though i see it every time i'm out.

I just wonder what's going to happen when there's more generations of guys than women unemployed or underemployed in the U.S. Guys usually never have a problem taking care of a woman financially, nor is it a stigma, it's definitely a stigma the other way around and guys usually can't handle it very well. Not to mention for the most part women HATE taking care of a man financially.

[Mandark]

you forgot marines

ah shit, the bareknuckled yin to the professors' heretical yang

[Great Rumbler]

I added some new words to the censored word list:

college intellectual
Jordan Peterson
cuck
cucked

See if you can guess which ones these are!

[Mandark]

btw, "racial differences in IQ aren't controversial when you talk Asians vs. whites!"

man gtfo, IQ And The Wealth Of Nations* pegs Thailand as a low-IQ country, and the children of Thai immigrants in the US have higher average academic benchmarks than native born white Americans. Shit's all over the place.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

*Which I am NOT endorsing good lord, just using it as an example of the state of this branch of "research"

[close]

[benjipwns]

I don't go picking fights with people over this IRL no matter how bad the U.S is getting. I try to avoid it even though i see it every time i'm out.

this is why you just stay in your desiccated castle rather than trying to survive on the streets with masculinity under assault

[Mandark]

you think jp would admit to blanking on "dilapidated" or would he insist that he meant a castle that had lost all its moisture?

[Assimilate]

Ah well, not everybody can be etiolate, or the all time WOAT of low effort shitposting Methodis.

I don't have the stamina like he did. I"m sorry to disappoint you 

i'm going to bed. World Cup tomorrow 

[Tasty]

 Oh hey an accurate title.

[Van Cruncheon]

can a fella get some dead kid pics all up in heah or is masculinity just. that. dead

[Mandark]

assimilate gonna fuck up the google image search and spam us with pictures of hodor

[agrajag]

you think jp would admit to blanking on "dilapidated" or would he insist that he meant a castle that had lost all its moisture?

He would probably tell you how well-moisturized castles are essential in repelling chaos dragons.

[Van Cruncheon]

i for one await the day when our bene gesserit social engineering over-zes build the last testosterone-fueled cryptocurrency farm outside the gates of the temple of st. sarkeesian

[thisismyusername]

his initial stance was straight up red meat garbaggio: THINK OF THE COLLEGE AGE MALE CHILDREN!!!

Considering there's less males going and graduating from Universities now while at the same time being dealt "toxic masculinity" bullshit? Don't you think just maybe it can be a talking point to be considered?

Maybe I'd go to school if it didn't cost me my fucking entire life to pay off given how stagant wages are. Got nothing to do with "toxic masculinity," but "try to keep your head above fucking water."

[team filler]

 

[benjipwns]

i for one await the day when our bene gesserit social engineering over-zes build the last testosterone-fueled cryptocurrency farm outside the gates of the temple of st. sarkeesian

unfortunately the gigantic temple's gravity well makes it an obvious target for the gamergate space corporations moon rocks

[thisismyusername]

"You watch Marvel movies HAHAHAHAHA"
-63.21% of all Assimilate posts

"Matrix Revolutions is secretly awesome guys!"
-36.79% of all Assimilate posts

If there was a way to Newsfeed multiple lines, this would be it.