Author Topic: Depression/mental health thread  (Read 109592 times)

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Madrun Badrun

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #540 on: August 27, 2019, 04:11:13 PM »
I don't remember if I posted this but I'm starting to think that this isn't a regular depression issue - I've really had a major break down - and I'm not doing good at all to be honest.

Had to submit a phd candidacy extension form today.  The grad chair is also on my phd committee anyway the form the had a mistake on it (done by my supervisor), so I get an email back asking about it.  I've basically been hiding from my committee for a year and especially the last few months, so this was not the way I wanted to interact with him again.  Anytime I have to do an admin thing my anxiety just kicks into high gear and I just feel mentally drained - which is incredibly silly because I realize this is a minor thing that is easily solvable. 

I'm a Puppy!

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #541 on: August 27, 2019, 07:53:40 PM »
I know this is cold comfort but anxiety and depression have no logic.
Also, a friend recently taught me to try to not put on comparative stuff. For example I had some anxiety a few weeks back over something sorta minor and I was really hard on myself saying "This is nothing compared to last year, I should be able to handle this" And my friend had to come in and remind me I practically almost died last year and that's not a healthy comparison, you're not supposed to almost die. Comparisons only exist to guilt you and that just makes things worse. It's hard, I know. But try not to compare situations. The only situation that matters is your current one.
que

Madrun Badrun

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #542 on: August 27, 2019, 11:31:22 PM »
Thanks.

I was talking yo a friend tonight that got his phd a while ago and he was talking about how these issues don't leave you after finishing.  Like all your self worth is tied into your research and it never changes.   really scared me. 

CatsCatsCats

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #543 on: September 11, 2019, 01:33:35 PM »
:stahp life being very hard again

VomKriege

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #544 on: September 11, 2019, 01:45:38 PM »
:stahp life being very hard again

Sending good vibes.
Also fartung in the process. That's how serious I'm concentrating.
ὕβρις

Himu

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #545 on: September 11, 2019, 02:59:00 PM »
You know how in old pc games you have the fog of war and you and slowly uncover the map bit by bit?

This year has been like that, except for me the fog is depression. Somehow, due to a mix of therapy and other things, I've started to become a bit more positive in my outlook in life. I've been able to re-engage in my hobbies, work on my social anxiety, while also planning for the future. It's been a really, really good year.
IYKYK

chronovore

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #546 on: September 11, 2019, 10:34:49 PM »

CatsCatsCats

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #547 on: September 13, 2019, 12:32:26 AM »
:stahp life being very hard again

feeling way better than when I made this post, kinda wrapped my head around the difficulties 

Tasty

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #548 on: September 13, 2019, 12:46:19 AM »
Really glad to hear it. :heartbeat

Tasty

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #549 on: November 11, 2019, 09:28:21 AM »
If you ramp down the abrasiveness of your forum personality, I'm sure you'd have people take you up on that offer. You're clearly curious and knowledgeable about several interesting topics.

I'm glad you feel less lonely lately.

« Last Edit: November 11, 2019, 09:33:17 AM by Tasty Meat »

chronovore

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #550 on: November 13, 2019, 04:27:37 AM »
If you ramp down the abrasiveness of your forum personality, [...]

or maybe just use firefox like the rest of us :camby

obvious defense mechanism is obvious

shosta

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #551 on: November 13, 2019, 05:10:04 AM »
i was thinking about PMing some folks here that i think are interesting to talk to and be like LETS BE FWENDS
you've never PM'd anyone here? Lol. My inbox is literally like 2% away from being full.
每天生气

Transhuman

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #552 on: November 13, 2019, 05:19:31 AM »
I think Blame Space's must be full because he never replies to my PMs

Tasty

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #553 on: November 13, 2019, 08:04:21 AM »
If you ramp down the abrasiveness of your forum personality, [...]

or maybe just use firefox like the rest of us :camby

I'm just giving you actionable things to do to improve your situation. Either take the advice or don't. :trumps

And I use Firefox quite a bit, just not as a default browser.

Tasty

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #554 on: December 05, 2019, 11:35:04 PM »
Woke up from a nap and immediately started crying like a bitch, which is new.

Transhuman

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #555 on: December 05, 2019, 11:48:48 PM »
I usually cry before sleep not after

Himu

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #556 on: March 04, 2020, 09:42:17 PM »
Sorry, only registered users can see this content. Please Login or Register.
IYKYK

shosta

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #557 on: March 04, 2020, 09:45:15 PM »
Cindi please call a suicide helpline and know that a lot of people here love you. You are not thinking right. You have a future worth living, you just can't see it right now.
每天生气

Transhuman

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #558 on: March 04, 2020, 09:46:48 PM »
Joe Biden could have a brain aneurysm tomorrow Cindi, and then think how dumb you'd feel

El Babua

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #559 on: March 04, 2020, 09:48:24 PM »
Please don't Cindi

G The Resurrected

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #560 on: March 04, 2020, 09:51:43 PM »
Cinidi I know things in the world aren't so great. It can get better, It has too.

Hotline
1-800-273-8255

PM/DM's are open don't feel like you are alone in this world, we are all in it together suffering through life in a multitude of different ways. I care about you boo!

TVC15

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #561 on: March 04, 2020, 09:51:48 PM »
Please reconsider and talk to someone you’re comfortable with, Cindi. I like you so much that I gave up clowning on you years ago. Who else have I done that for? Really!

My messages are open, too.
serge

G The Resurrected

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #562 on: March 04, 2020, 09:53:53 PM »
Please reconsider and talk to someone, Cindi. I like you so much that I gave up clowning on you years ago. Who else have I done that for? Really!

Seriously!

Cindi we all care about you, and without you things would suck more.

benjipwns

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #563 on: March 04, 2020, 09:56:39 PM »
Nope. Not yet. Don't let the smarmy Yuropeans (and timu, especially him) be right about you never going anywhere but Mexico. :karen

Great Rumbler

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #564 on: March 04, 2020, 09:57:18 PM »
TALK TO SOMEBODY IN REAL LIFE ABOUT HOW YOU'RE FEELING

NOT ON THE INTERNET, AN ACTUAL PERSON
dog

TVC15

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #565 on: March 04, 2020, 10:10:18 PM »
Has anyone heard from her? Should we contact authorities and do we have enough info?
serge

G The Resurrected

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #566 on: March 04, 2020, 10:18:54 PM »
I wish there was more love and compassion in this world for those who are suffering through life. There's too much pain out there in the world and not enough love.

Cindi we Love you and this pain you have it doesn't have to be yours alone. Talk to us and let us take some of that pain for you.

OnlyRegret

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #567 on: March 04, 2020, 10:36:08 PM »
Please don't  :(
You matter to us  :heartbeat

Himu

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #568 on: March 04, 2020, 10:37:34 PM »
Thanks for all the messages and love. Mupepe and I talked. I have looked at every variable for the future, and suicide has been the top option. Currently on the phone with a suicide hotline.
IYKYK

Great Rumbler

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #569 on: March 04, 2020, 10:40:01 PM »
bless up, sis
dog

BisMarckie

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #570 on: March 04, 2020, 10:47:51 PM »
Thanks for all the messages and love. Mupepe and I talked. I have looked at every variable for the future, and suicide has been the top option. Currently on the phone with a suicide hotline.

We haven’t interacted very much on this board, but I appreciate your idealism and your sense of humor in your posts. I am sure you will pull through this.

Akala

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #571 on: March 04, 2020, 10:53:29 PM »
At least try France.

G The Resurrected

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #572 on: March 04, 2020, 11:00:57 PM »
We love you Boo!  :heartbeat

Don't ever think you in this alone. You got people here who care and love you. I hope you feel it, I want you to feel that love!


Himu

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #573 on: March 04, 2020, 11:04:00 PM »
Honestly the discussion with the hotline hasn't been helpful.
IYKYK

shosta

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #574 on: March 04, 2020, 11:11:16 PM »
Do you feel like you need to be put under monitoring? My friend just got out of semi-institutionalization for a month-ish and it stopped him from killing himself and gave him just enough breathing space to figure out what to do next.
每天生气

thisismyusername

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #575 on: March 04, 2020, 11:11:44 PM »
Honestly the discussion with the hotline hasn't been helpful.

I mean, the best they're going to do is "you have so much to live for!" and probably call a psych ward to have you check in. That's kind-of their job to do. They don't know you personally so giving deep-reaching advice probably isn't in their M.O. to do.

Himu

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #576 on: March 04, 2020, 11:12:49 PM »
I don't think I should be monitored. Honestly the thing that made me reconsider is the fact my dad needs me with his health problems. Tomorrow I pick him up at 6:30 AM for a surgery. It would awful if I couldn't make it because I was dead.
IYKYK

Himu

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #577 on: March 04, 2020, 11:19:52 PM »
I feel better now. Often ideation comes in waves. This was very, very strong. Often when I have ideation I grit my teeth and bare with it because I know the urge will be over soon. But this urge was so strong, ya'll. :stahp
IYKYK

G The Resurrected

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #578 on: March 04, 2020, 11:22:28 PM »
Do you feel added stress and responsibility for taking care of your father? I know how hard that can be on some folks, especially those that have difficulties of their own. Have you looked into getting some assistance in helping ease some of those responsibilities? Thus giving you a break.

Himu

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #579 on: March 04, 2020, 11:28:05 PM »
No I don't feel pressured from it. I feel pressured from the fact there's no future. For our country, humanity, or our planet. Actually the planet will be ok.
IYKYK

Himu

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #580 on: March 04, 2020, 11:30:09 PM »
Goddamit the radio is playing Landslide. You mother fuckers.
IYKYK

benjipwns

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #581 on: March 04, 2020, 11:31:22 PM »
Those aren't your burdens. You said it yourself earlier in the discussion with Glenda, just do what you can.

Himu

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #582 on: March 04, 2020, 11:36:17 PM »
Those aren't your burdens. You said it yourself earlier in the discussion with Glenda, just do what you can.

I can't afford mental healthcare for now which I desperately need. Currently pulling myself up from my bootstraps and trying to work 2 jobs to afford it. The country and society we livr in are sick. I'm sick and tired of it. I'm so desperate for care now that earlier when we were joking trump should run on m4a against Biden that I actually humored the thought of voting for Trump to get it. I'm desperate.

Suggest poditive star trek episodes for me to watch while I drink tonight. I bought two more Modelo 40's.
IYKYK

benjipwns

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #583 on: March 04, 2020, 11:39:20 PM »
TNG's "Disaster", "Clues", "Deja Q", I find "Tapestry" to be positive but you might not

G The Resurrected

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #584 on: March 04, 2020, 11:47:57 PM »
I get that feeling too Cindi, but one day it's gonna start moving in the right direction. It might have to get a bit worse before it starts to peak and go the other direction, but it will start to get better. For the time being though you can only do what you can do. Those burdens are not yours alone, but all of ours. If there is something you can do and be an active part of it do it! Any action is better than no action when it comes to the problems you are concerned with, they are worth fighting for.

I find unplugging from a bit from it all can be super helpful in reducing the stress of those burdens. Have you tried anything like that?

Texas right? What is it about the mental health services there that you can't get access to?

TNG: Elementary, Dear Data; Ship in a Bottle
« Last Edit: March 04, 2020, 11:51:59 PM by G The Resurrected »

thisismyusername

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #585 on: March 04, 2020, 11:48:35 PM »
Check to see if either of your jobs has an "Employee Assistance Program" where they give you like 4-8 free sessions with a councilor. Tell them to recommend you to a psychologist/mental health facility that will prescribe the meds. Depending on your job and the insurance (you have it, right?) you should be able to get meds for cheap if you explain your situation/pay/etc.

Himu

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #586 on: March 04, 2020, 11:52:21 PM »
And then things are decided by some bum fuck state like SC

Jesus Christ thankfully I have booze on me.

IYKYK

Himu

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #587 on: March 04, 2020, 11:57:11 PM »
Check to see if either of your jobs has an "Employee Assistance Program" where they give you like 4-8 free sessions with a councilor. Tell them to recommend you to a psychologist/mental health facility that will prescribe the meds. Depending on your job and the insurance (you have it, right?) you should be able to get meds for cheap if you explain your situation/pay/etc.

Extremely helpful post. Thank you.


I can't afford mental healthcare for now which I desperately need.

Check PMs. I wanna help.

Thank you.

I get that feeling too Cindi, but one day it's gonna start moving in the right direction. It might have to get a bit worse before it starts to peak and go the other direction, but it will start to get better. For the time being though you can only do what you can do. Those burdens are not yours alone, but all of ours. If there is something you can do and be an active part of it do it! Any action is better than no action when it comes to the problems you are concerned with, they are worth fighting for.

I find unplugging from a bit from it all can be super helpful in reducing the stress of those burdens. Have you tried anything like that?

Texas right? What is it about the mental health services there that you can't get access to?

TNG: Elementary, Dear Data; Ship in a Bottle

Yeah I think I'll unplug for a week.
IYKYK

benjipwns

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #588 on: March 04, 2020, 11:58:52 PM »
Regarding prescriptions there are a variety of discount networks you can join, GoodRx is a fairly large one, SingleCare is another. You can pretty much just search for them and sign up for a whole bunch for free, they send you cards or give you codes, you just give these to the pharmacist and they'll see if they accept them or not then apply the best one. Some like Kroger or whatever have their own plans (it's technically part of GoodRx), you sometimes have to pay a little, like a few bucks a month but you can get like 90+% off the prescriptions so it works out. Sometimes it's actually cheaper than a co-pay on insurance can be.

Himu

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #589 on: March 05, 2020, 12:06:49 AM »
I have been to Legacy and didn't realize they offered mental health services.
IYKYK

benjipwns

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #590 on: March 05, 2020, 12:34:57 AM »
Another thing to keep in mind with doctors, it's easy but can be forgettable, is let them know your situation financially/insurance/etc. wise and many can be flexible. There's a cost built in for them to work with insurance that they'll often work with patients who can only pay "cash" on a discount because it's simpler to do in terms of paperwork.

Not saying there aren't doctors who want the most money and will set up barriers, but it's like anything, there's ones who just want to help ya out and will accommodate you. Especially if you're not a problem patient in the meaning of causing headaches on stuff.

This can also help when it comes prescription time if need be, they'll often know the general cost of drugs and will look for generics and cheaper ones to try first. Sometimes that might not work out but if you take the time to explain that it's too costly for you there are often similar ones they might be able to switch you to.

I don't want to pretend there aren't burdens, especially financially, but for a lot of routine care there are a number of ways to help keep costs reasonable. To use myself as an example, and I know I've been blessed situation-wise, but I don't have insurance for drugs (or much at all regarding mental health actually) and with these various steps and those discount networks the costs have been only like $30-35 a month. I know not everyone can afford that or it can sometimes be tight but I myself thought it more daunting that it turned out to be for me after I started poking around just a little bit.

If it feels too daunting looking at things you can always just step back a bit and plus, as Esch has already done, you can always ask us to help look up stuff. I know until I started looking I didn't really comprehend how many options there are for someone like me, and I don't even live in a big ol city let alone a megalopolis.

Himu

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #591 on: March 05, 2020, 01:04:55 AM »
TNG - Disaster really soothed my heart. Thanks Benji.
IYKYK

eleuin

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #592 on: March 05, 2020, 01:32:20 AM »
another sliding scale option

https://openpathcollective.org/

Himu

  • Senior Member
Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #593 on: March 05, 2020, 01:53:55 AM »
another sliding scale option

https://openpathcollective.org/

Found two therapists very close by and inexpensive. Thank you very much.
IYKYK

team filler

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #594 on: March 05, 2020, 02:04:28 AM »
love you cindi   :heart

one of my twitter brehs had to get help for his kid tonight

https://twitter.com/MidgetTamer/status/1235416202035507200

I love all of you  :tocry
*****

Potato

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #595 on: March 05, 2020, 04:50:57 AM »
Hey Cindi, there isn't much I can do for you from the other side of the world, but I would certainly miss you if you were to do yourself any harm. Please reach out if you need someone to listen.
Spud

Yeti

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #596 on: March 05, 2020, 08:49:00 AM »
We’ve survived nearly four years of Trump, we can survive four more if comes down to it. It’s a terribly cliche saying, but I hope you can find the serenity to accept the things you can’t change, the courage to change the things you can, and the wisdom to know the difference. I think you are good on those last two, but you seem to really be struggling with finding serenity to accept things you can’t change. With politics you can only do so much because everyone can have a say, and some people get to have a bigger say than others. But politics is just a part of life, there is so much more out there than politics
WDW

CatsCatsCats

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #597 on: March 05, 2020, 09:32:22 AM »
Really glad to see you pushing through those thoughts and urges, Cindi. I struggled to come up to a reply to this yesterday, I was glad to see others stepping up. I felt an amount of guilt for bringing up suicide as a way out of this shit in the politics thread. I also just didn’t know what to say because I had very similar plans yesterday morning. Been feeling very out of control. Was thinking I’d hang myself at work before anyone go there, there’s a spot where I could do a real drop hanging. Instead I wrote an “im taking a mental health day” email from my work desk and reset the alarms and left. Then I researched and got a debt transfer loan dealio that’s going to make it so I can survive even if my ex completely stiffs me. For me the thoughts come at hard times, but I’m getting a lot better at taking a positive action instead. Sending all my love

bork

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #598 on: March 05, 2020, 12:27:19 PM »
Very glad you're doing OK, Cindi.  Hope that Euro trip is awesome!
ど助平

bork

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Re: Depression/mental health thread
« Reply #599 on: March 05, 2020, 12:40:52 PM »
Really glad to see you pushing through those thoughts and urges, Cindi. I struggled to come up to a reply to this yesterday, I was glad to see others stepping up. I felt an amount of guilt for bringing up suicide as a way out of this shit in the politics thread. I also just didn’t know what to say because I had very similar plans yesterday morning. Been feeling very out of control. Was thinking I’d hang myself at work before anyone go there, there’s a spot where I could do a real drop hanging. Instead I wrote an “im taking a mental health day” email from my work desk and reset the alarms and left. Then I researched and got a debt transfer loan dealio that’s going to make it so I can survive even if my ex completely stiffs me. For me the thoughts come at hard times, but I’m getting a lot better at taking a positive action instead. Sending all my love

Cats, so glad you're doing better today, too!  :)
ど助平